The 'I hate Christmas cards but love Christmas' support thread now open

[NorksAreMessy]

have sent no cards for more than 5 years.
My life is not worse.
In fact it is quite a bit better


And don't start me on round robins.....

[exoticfruits]

I love the cards-I would rather get rid of presents. I love catching up with everyone with a card and letter.I don't see the point in sending a card to someone you see anyway. I think however that postage costs and the internet will make them redundant soon.

[mrsm123]

norks - hahaha!!!!

ok, ill do my best to refrain from nonsense.

[NorksAreMessy]

hooray!

[AndiMac]

I hate sending Christmas cards, but I do make a few concessions. As all our family are overseas, I will send some to my aunts and uncles about every other year or so, just so they know where we are living and what the names of our kids are.

And of course, my truly dirty little secret is that I love getting Christmas cards in the post, but I don't encourage it. And I really don't like cards handed to me in person. Why hand me a card to say Merry Christmas? Why not say Merry Christmas to me, as you will probably put more thought and feelings of good will into that than into the card you churned out in a huge production batch one evening.

[NorksAreMessy]

oooh, Andi I think I spot another exception to the rule.
The overseas relative....hmmm. what do the collective think, acceptable or not?

i am veering towards Ok if the card is also full of news and photos and is a genuine chance to catch up, but if it is just a mass produced card signed and nothing else, thst is jjust a card then, innit?

[WhereBeThatBlackbirdTo]

Can I join your collective Norks?

I've spent many years hating the damn things. Such a relief to find I'm not alone. Thank you, thank you!

[WhereBeThatBlackbirdTo]

Collective Norks!! Somehow that didn't come out quite as I meant!

[JKSLtd]

Definitely part of the collective here!

I used to keep an Excel spreadsheet of the cards I sent, and who sent me one back
I got up to well over 100 cards every year.
Then one year life got in the way, I never got past the Bs & the world didn't end so I thought, feckit & stopped sending them

I hate when someone hands you a card in person, so naff.
Even worse when they are going round the room handing them out, see you & take one from the bottom of the pile - it just has their name written inside, no name on the envelope or at the top of the card = emergency, oh shit i forgot about you card, no thanks very much!!!

Now I put a FB message saying 'Happy Christmas', I email a few people that aren't on my FB and if there's anyone left well never mind.

MIL insists on searching down the perfect card for each person/family. So DH & I get 'To my son & DIL' cards - what a waste of headspace.

[NorksAreMessy]

WBTBT the collective Norks welcome you to their collective bosom.
Break free, buy none, send none. give the money to charity or spend it on gin.
NOBODY CARES if you don't give out cards (that is what we are telling ourselves, and what we believe)

JKS, yes! the handed-to-you-card is SUCH a nonsense

Maryz in which case they fall into 'doing a kind thing' which is the catch-all exception.

March on sisters...away from Hallmark, away from Clintons, away from 'charity' cards that donate 7% of the price to some vague charity.
March towards the off licence, the Age Concern office and the shoe shop!

What don't we want? CHRISTMAS CARDS
When don't we want them? ummmm in the run up to Christmas?

[NorksAreMessy]

also, JKSLtd ...a SPREADSHEET!

[AndiMac]

Norks, yes, the cards for overseas relatives are usually full of news, not just our names at the bottom. It has in the past (and I'm really outing myself here) even contained an occasional round robin for them...

[JKSLtd]

I know!! I duly hang my head in shame!!

[Baffledandbewildered]

I thought I was the only one who felt like this....... I am not a freak hurray !!!

[ThePsychicSatsuma]

ooh. I definately want to save money, and loathe writing the cards...
but I would feel so guilty for not sending?

[ThePsychicSatsuma]

hmmmm

very thought provoking thread.

May just announce on FB I am doing my bit for the environment.... and not doing cards.
Will have to do one to 90 yr old GG

[GreenandBlacksAddict]

I tried to send e cards last year and to make an environmental stand saying I wouldn't be sending cards. My mum whinged like merry hell - oh I like a nice card- and her sister whinged etc etc why is it if your 65 plus you cannot be bothered about the environment ? As long as you have a mantlepiece full of cards at Xmas. So this year I told my mum if I haven't seen relatives in the past 2 years I am not sending them a birthday card. As I am pregnant again she will probably pass this off as me being too busy, have reduced Xmas cards from 100+ to 40ish, will endeavour to reduce by half again next year !

[NorksAreMessy]

satsuma let go of the guilt. You are doing a positive thing. If you are taken off people's 'Christmas card list' then meh, who cares. If they are elderly people, then you can invoke the 'doing a kind thing rule'.

How does the guilt manifest itself satsuma? what are you worried about? The NCCC will support you through it.

GBA well done on the reduction. You can do it, we will help. Your MUm and Auntie might need a card, but who is number 27 on your list? Do they really need one?

[ThePsychicSatsuma]

I'm worried that,....
people will think Im cheap
tight
slack
lazy
disorganised
cold-hearted


OMGosh the power of the guilt is immense

[JKSLtd]

Satsuma will this help?

cheap/tight - say you are giving £x to a charity instead
lazy/disorganised - let them know earlyish so it's obvious it's a plan
cold-hearted - pick a charity they can't possibly argue with (depend what their soft spots are, Help for Heroes, some childrens charity, cute furry animals, etc)

You can even donate to more than one - and when you say 'the money I would have spent' - only you know how much that might have been and how much you're donating.

[ThePsychicSatsuma]

Been thinking about this, also feel a bit that not sending will upset people, they'll think they've upset me regardless of what charity reason there is. I don't want them to feel they've upset me/ that I've cooled towards them...

or possibly it's all a pile of arse.
Whatever I am def. sending A huge amount LESS than usual,.

[ThePsychicSatsuma]

help for heroes is a good un. or NSPCC

[Pascha]

What don't we want? CHRISTMAS CARDS!!
When don't we want them? EVER!!


Repeat to fade...

[NorksAreMessy]

If someone doesn't send you a card, but they say 'happy christmas' are you sad? Do you think they don't like you any more?

NO, you just think, "ah, another clues up member of the No Christmas Card Collective'.
If you think they will be upset ring them / email/text.
If you don't feel like doing that, you don't know them that well...why are you sending them a card?