Woefully imbalanced presents for my DDs - does it matter

[DeckTheHallWithBowlsOfPomBears]

DD1 is getting a laptop - about £250 worth. This is more than we would normally spend and it was a bit of a spontaneous decision when DH was at the airport recently.
DD2 is getting an ipod speaker docking thing - more like about £50.

DH thinks we have to get her another big main present to make up for the massive discrepancy. They also both have brilliant stockings with loads of stuff in them, and a couple of other decent under the tree presents. DH thinks we need to go and get DD2 a DSi or something, but I think it's entirely pointless getting her something just for the sake of it. She already has an ipod touch (DH's old one) so she has something to play games on. She could probably do with some clothes but I would rather get these with her after Christmas. She's 8 btw. I'm hoping she won't be calculating enough to recognise the difference in valuation, IYSWIM.
Any views / ideas? Thanks.

I think it depends on how much your DD wants a docking station. If she has been really hoping for one then she wont mind so much what her sister has.

I dont always spend equal amounts on my DCs but they usually get the main thing they ask for so they are always happy.

This year DD (14) has asked for a piano which has cost £400

DS1(12) has asked for electric drums costing £350

DS2(8) has asked for a Kinect bar for the xbox which is £130. He said he doesnt mind that his siblings presents cost more. We are going to give him about £50 in a card though. Not so much to make sure they've all had the same amount but just a little extra that he can spend on himself.

This is more because they will all end up playing with the kinect than to try and make things equal.

DD1 (17) asked for (and is getting) around £70 worth of books. DD2 (12) is getting a £60 touchscreen phone. DD3 chose, asked for and is getting a watch which cost £5.94. All of them have the same number of parcels (spent today wrapping stuff for stockings), but the cost to me is widely different. However, I fully expect that on Christmas Day morning, each of them will be delighted by what they each have, and what their sisters have, with no totting up of how much was spent.

However, DD1 got a laptop for her birthday rather than Christmas to avoid exactly this situation, as a laptop is generally regarded as a "big present" round here.

We are now thinking of getting her Zhu Zhu hamsters and some accompanying tat. I reckon she will like them a lot. It's not exactly going to cost a fortune, but it is right up her street. The problem is she hasn't asked for anything big at all.

I agree oldjolyon, that's sort of what I was trying to convey, but you put it better. If the dc see an imbalance that's one thing, but if they see the parents desperately trying to 'bridge the gap' they'll be much more aware of it and understand that their parents also see it as unfair. A bit like getting out the scales to weigh up everyone's piece of cake.

Tickets for a show, or even a shopping trip are nice ideas but on Christmas morning they wouldn't take away from the fact that one present is bigger than the other.

More important to teach them not to compare ( they will always in life have friends or even their own sibling with more money/friends/ toys/ house , car...) if you really try to bridge this gap, you're teaching them to compare and be dissatisfied IMO.

I see you've opted for the hamsters. I'm sure she'll like them. Just hope dd1 doesn't claim it's unfair cos dd. 2 got 2 presents instead of her 1, and that dd 2 got 2 fun presents, piggy dock and funny hamsters, whereas she, dd1 only hot a boring laptop, which is for school reall anyway.......!

Just remembered dh grandparents were always scrupulous about spending the same on him and his sister. Even after we were together, and him & sil were both working adults, they would still do it, and Sellotape the extra £2.32 to a bar of chocolate to be sure that dh didn,t feel robbed cos his present had been kingly cheaper than his sister's! he must've been 25 at the time.

I would say it was OL if the was a grown up sort of docking station - but if it's a novelty one that looks like a toy I think the inbalance would be too obvious - sorry.

Could you swap the docking station for a grown up one?

OMG - totally with husband!! Get DS. Will make elder daughter realise the cost of her laptop too!

Wow i must be in the minority then.Dd almost 8 will not notice who has more or how much it might have cost and she has 2 older db and a younger db.

some years i spend more on one or the other .
Ds1 and ds2 have less prsents to open as theres cost more and there old enough to understand that .

would just make sure dd does not do a well mine cost more than yours .Though at 12 she should be beyond that but then only have one girl so no idea if 2 girls is harder .

DH parents have always done the same value gifts for their 3 dc - now continue this even though all adults, gives DH and I lovely puzzle to work out each year as his DS always has a gift, we can never think of anything we really need so MIL gives us a cheque to same value- we really appreciate this but also love the " ooh wonder what your DS had this year if we got a cheque for that much?"
Not helpful for you but I would agree with your DH if you can afford it.

DH parents make everything absolutely equal right down to the last £1 for my DDs which I find a bit weird.
I will have a look at "better" docking station.

Zhu Zhu Hamster is great, my ds got one a couple of weeks ago and loves it (to the point had to order some track/runs for it for xmas)
You can spend quite a lot once you start buying the various bits to go with it. So if 'similar value' money is the issue then you can easily bridge a gap here (although wouldn't say spend similar anount on hamster tat stuff).

But IMO it still doesn't get away from being a toy which doesn't look like it costs as much as it does, as oposed to a laptop which is mega bucks.

I remember as a child being overlooked for a walkman. My younger 2 sisters both got one on different occassions but I never did and was quite envious particularly as I had a long journey by bus to college and it would have been v useful to combat boredom. SO when I was 17 my bf of time got me one and mum said 'oh you've got one of those already though' when I opened it on xmas day. I said no i haven't actually...

My point being is there anything her older sibling has had in previous years that she wasn't old enough for at the time? Eg if oldest has got a ds already then yes go ahead and get her a ds now. But if oldest hasn't got a ds either then that will be a big injustice to her (possibly) that her younger sibling got a fun game thing and she got a school type laptop that she needed anyway but you have given as a present to save yourself some money.

Course you know your girls better to know what kind of rection you may get from them both. I think you realise there is an issue here though or you wouldn't be posting and unsure what to do...

MIL insists on spending the same amount on everyone, os we quite often end up wiht pounshop tat making up the difference. She's never gone as far as sellotaping coins to something thankfully

They both have Nintendo DS already, but DD2 dropped hers in the loo a while back. She plays games on the iPod touch tho, so I dont think she needs another DS. Thanks for your input gillybean, seeker infact everyone. DH has gone off to the shops with a determined look on his face. He is going to get a better class of dock/speaker and take back the pig. I think he has his heart set on hamsters as well ( v childish DH)