Do you get them everything on their list and if not how do you explain?

[Marne]

I made the mistake of getting dd1 to write a list as i had no idea what to get her, i have bought her a few things (in sales) which i thought she might like and was hoping to buy her a couple more things that she could choose.

So last night she wrote her list which consists of 15 items, most are around £20-50 each . I explained that 'father x-mas wont to be able to get her all those things as they are very expensive' she said 'well, im sure his elfs can make them in the workshop' .

Do i just buy her 1 or 2 items and hope she forgets about the rest?

How many things off of your dc's list do you actually buy?

we use lists as a great way for DS to articulate what he likes and wants without having to buy in a shop - we look at something he says "I want that" - "perhaps I can put it on my list for Christmas/ Birthday" and a list is half the fun - anticpation etc

FC does stockings only in our house. Presents are from people - us, other family etc

Lists is a "wish list" and doesn't equate to a "get list" but is handy for charting through the months what he consistently likes (such as playmobil) and what is a passing fad

I would add we don't actually tend to write the list either... it's just talked about

Same as above in our house: FC brings the stocking and everything else is from the real humans!

We don't do a list per se as Santa chooses what he thinks she would like. Have told her that his elves only make wooden and soft toys etc in his workshop (like in the story books) and so she tends to get a traditional stocking filled with fruit and nuts, choc pennies, a new cuddly friend, socks and sillies. Last year she wanted a Nintendo DS and i told her that Santa doesn't make electrical goods but her friend at school got a Wii from him so that backfired somewhat though she never questioned it. She isn't a greedy child so is always happy with what she gets. We get the rest!

We don't do lists for Santa although we do write a letter outlining what we would like. Unfortunately my family are into lists so we do them and the kids understand that. However according to my DD Christmas is great because it's really cheap as we don't have to buy the presents that FC leaves!

Ah, as our children are not yet at the list-writing proper stage we have 'The List', which I have found to be a marvellous way of getting them out of toy shops without meltdown in the months of Sept-Dec. Like this: 'OK, well, we're not buying it today, but we'll put it on The List.'

Ds writes a list every year (which I share with my sisters, as they always ask what he would like). However, he knows that these are suggestions only, and that although he will probably get some items from his list, he won't get them all. Which is great, as it leaves him some things to save up for with his pocket money!

The idea of them asking FC for specific things is weird. I accept that it's because I was brought up on the 'you'll be thankful for whatever you get, asking is what spoilt children do' school of parenting, but I find the idea of my ds' demanding 'that' and (more importantly expecting to get it) horrible.

My family when growing up always used lists and I remember being very fed up when my mum would ask for one every year and then not buy anything I'd ask for from it and no explanation was ever given either, so I'd end up feeling gutted. She often just bought I think what she saw in the supermarket, whilst buying food. So I am making sure with my two DC that I'm clearer on explaining that they can only have one or two from the list not everything and will share the list with extended family if requested. Still a plan formulating really, as my two are so young still, but Oxeye's idea is similar to what I plan

My two DS write santa a letter and mention things they would like, they do however know clearly that santa will bring you some presents that he thinks you will like and your letter is just to give him ideas. I made it clear at the start that santa has to deliver presents to children all over the world and does not have room for loads for any 1 child.

In our house all childrens presents are from santa so I will use the letter (if I think the presents are appropriate) to give Grandmas etc ideas.

Last year DS2 (then 5) asked santa for a baby sister - he did not oblige and DS1 had to wait ages before santa brought him a Nintendo DS! They have never been disappointed or mentioned anything they did not receive.

nappyaddict presents are not the centre of Christmas in our house so it is just not something we discuss. DD gets something small that she opens after dinner - so about 4pm Christmas day. She has never done a letter to santa either, unless they do it at school. We do leave out brandy, mince pie and carrots for santa et al and she does get a stocking.

our theoretical list is a combination of a - well lets put it on the list way of forgetting stuff in shops and also finding out what he would really like as keeps repeating

FC brings something from the list and also a surprise for us all as a family, rest comes from family/friends...

Why didn't someone start a thread like this three months ago? Since the school year started, it appears to be start of advertising aimed at giving kids ammunition to beat their parents into submission over multiple varieties of (expensive) tat.

I clearly was naive in the extreme. . DS (4.5) and DD (nearly 3): 'can we have that mum?'. Me: 'put it on your list' (and repeat thirty times a day). They now delight in going through any catalogue/xmas gift guide going, adding to the list (to be fair, I doubt they remember most of it althogh Barbie pointless dog swimming pool featuring alarmingly high). Granny to DS: ' I really like that picture you did for grandad, could you do one for me?' DS: 'I tell you what granny, put it on your list.'

Isn't the point of a list that the person getting the gift chooses something from it? I told ds1 he can ask for a few things for his bday and he will get ONE of them. Also, need to heavily brainwash pre-list (this works till about 8 years old)..."Oh, wouldn't it be nice to have a...", "What a shame your remote control car doesn't work anymore" (a few times a day and the pennies drop). This works v well if you have already got the gift !

DD1's 'list' is partially real and partially hypothetical; her 6th birthday is at the end of this month so she only receives gifts at this end of the year. From January until the end of October whenever she declares she's fallen in love with something we suggest that she put it on her ideas list nearer her birthday.

She's written a letter to FC - she did it during half-term whilst DH and I were doing some marking - she asked him if he was feeling relaxed then asked if she could have some Sylvanian Families stuff or some lego, some books and some nail varnish. She added a PS requesting something for her little sister, explaining that she was too young to write a letter (DD2 is nearly 18 months old).

DD1 knows that her letter is to give FC ideas in case he needs them and is under no illusions about being given everything.

Both sides of our family are very keen on lists so we use www.whattogive.com and add ideas throughout the year. That way there's a fairly general list, along the lines of 'audio CDs, stripy tights and arts/crafts stuff', for family that want it and we don't have to enter in to the whole co-ordinating gifts thing that used to occur!

If I got dd1 everything on her list I would be bankrupt - she 'only' wants an ipod or iphone, a trampoline, a poodle, a 'princess castle' kennel for her poodle, a pink collar with real diamonds for her poodle and a matching diamond necklace for herself, a camcorder and a barbie mermaid as well all the pop party cd's ever made and a new cd player.

I tell that Santa has so many little boys and girls to give gifts to and there are only so many gifts to go around so he only brings so many things to each person - besides which Santa cannot make Poodles and thinks she is too young for an i-anything and for a camcorder.

DD said that she knew FC wasn't real when she left writing her list till a week before Christmas and didn't get anything on it! Because I'd already bought her presents.

Our DC were very annoyed one year when we asked them to write a list and they didn't receive anything on it. We read them the riot act and explained it was a guide only because, tbh, their reaction spoilt our christmas that year.

The following year we got wise and asked them to write to FC detailing 3 items that they would really love to have. Eldest DC was amazed when he received not only the 3 requested (he had clearly "got" very heavy handed hint from us and requested small items :o ) but was totally stoked to have got a fair few more presents too!

So, from experience, letters a lovely idea but set out what you can afford to give in flowery way in terms of their letter-based expectations!

sorry, not anything meant everything

Ours are only allowed to ask for 3 things. We discuss all the things they might like, then I steer them towards we narrow it down to 3 sensible things.

Santa's elves are extremely busy. And they still have to buy the raw materials for the gifts, don't they? They can only produce so many gifts, so if one child asks for too much it could mean theer aren't enough pressies to go round. Alternatively, Santa might conceive it as greedy and decide to bring them hardly anything. But as he is constantly spying at this time of year (via his agents, the robins!) he knows enough about them to come up with some things they might want but haven't thought of, you know?

jooly am loving the idea of Robins as agents for Santa.......we always get a fair few of them in our garden :o

tulpe the robins are fab! We see a lot of them (obviously more at this time of year, as that is when Santa takes on extra agents to up his surveillance!)

I can stop a whinge with a "ooh look- there's a robin!" at this time of year

Oh- and of course that is WHY they have red breasts- it's to mark that they work for Santa!

waterlooroad How old is she? Does she never point stuff out in shops and say she likes it (not necessarily for Christmas but just that she likes it) or do you just never take her to shops with toys in

How much do you usually spend on her including her stocking?

Does she get toys only on birthdays and Christmas or at other points in the year too?

She is 9. We don't spend much time in shops so she does not really ask for things. Every now and again something will catch her eye but it is quite rare tbh. We live somewhere quite rural so shops are not really on her radar.

Her stocking will be about £5- £10. She gets a few books from the charity shop and fruit and sweets. Maybe a small thing in addition such as a pack of cards or similar.

She does not have a lot of toys, but I do buy her things at other times. So she wanted a telescope she had to earn some of the money to pay for it and then we paid for the rest. We don't buy birthday presents.