My friend committed suicide - looking for support and advice

[Pr1mr0se]

This week my friend committed suicide. She was very religious so you can understand how extreme her situation was when she did this. She was in a violent and abusive relationship and had been trying to leave her husband for several years. She leaves a young child who will now be brought up by her husband and his family.

For various reasons I am not likely to be able to go to her funeral.

What else can I do to mark her passing / make sure it's not all in vain?

I feel so sorry for her child. I don't know what I can do as a friend rather than relative about that either.

It is very sad that your friend ended their own life. I have no words of real comfort that will not sound like empty platitudes. Grief is an individual path we have to walk ... each of us grieves in our own way and there is no 'right' and no 'wrong' way, but it takes times; sometimes a lot of time.

Are you a follower of Jesus? My only advice is to give it all to the Lord in prayer and I pray you will know His comforting presence at this time. Speak to your Minister too. Be kind to yourself.

These links may be helpful ...

I’ve Lost Someone to Suicide

Support after Suicide - Losing a Friend

Losing Someone to Suicide - MIND

Samaritans

Thankyou

I’m sorry this must be so hard. if you are religious yourself maybe prayer, but I feel like @Thegreatestoftheseislove regarding individual grief.

Depending where you are could you light a candle or leave a light on during the time of the funeral that you are there in spirit/heart even if not physically

If she has family can you write maybe share a story or two about your friend. If not maybe write a card and just keep it. One way of meaning is sharing about that person. I’m a Catholic and the night before or after the service there is often a gathering or there is the eulogy. You won’t get to hear that, but you can record your own memories.

Do you have any suspicion that the child may be in danger? Does social services have any involvement? If not or you aren’t sure and you are in UK Contact the NSPCCand talk to them. You can just ask for advice anonymously. You don’t need to be a family member to report a child that may be in danger. The worry is lots of people know, or know something and it doesn’t get reported by anyone or maybe just one person and is missed.

I am sorry to hear this. When a friend of mine died I did something like a memorial for them. I went to Sea Life to mark the day and videoed it. I then stood by the river and it gave me a sense of them parting. I waited one month to do this as I couldn’t do it before emotionally. If you do something to mark this, of course you do what you would want to do yourself.

I know somebody as well who lost their daughter to suicide in her 20s and she has gone into campaiging.

I wrote a send of note on their facebook which people liked and the family from my friend. I also got motivated to be more involved in justice as I felt that she went through unfair treatment in life. I wrote an article on a blog for her.

There are domestic abuse charities in the Christian faith. May be you could get involved if you wanted to.

I have seen this charity do a talk in church before and it is one of many and there are non Christian domestic abuse charities as well.
https://www.mothersunion.org/campaign/rise-up/