Can we talk about Tamar?

[ElatedAzurePlayer]

I don’t usually write poetry. I have written a short poem that I’d value feedback on please. I’d also love to open conversations about the narrative itself found in 2 Samuel 13.

Tamar

Muffled whispers peal,
though they think I do not hear.
Yet none dare speak up,
far less do I.
Oh, that I might wish to die.

The day is spent.
I wait,
for time to turn back its hand,
though I know it will not.
Might I have saved my life?
Oh, that he would remember me.

The colourless horizon stretches,
like the coming days,
I will surely know.
Still it rains; still the skies are grey,
as I wish I were,
that he had never
looked upon me.

Wool mockingly adorns,
clinging where love
now never will.
My skin remembers,
though my heart tries not.
Fine linen, colour, hope.
Torn and discarded,
even as I am.

Even my body knows,
this does not belong to me.
I scratch at my wrists,
where linen once brushed its lips.
Where I was held,
gripped,
tight.

Moody clouds brood,
in this darkened sconce.
He skulks — eyes black,
vacant.
He comes and goes,
though I stay.
Always, I stay.

He shouts into the bleak,
with fitful sleep.
And daybreak persists,
of which I choose no part.
Rays bleed into darkness
As silence
continues,
with her testimony.

Footnote - Poem is based on the defilement of Tamar by her half brother and the aftermath for HER which is not depicted in Scripture. It is based on a Biblical narrative of one of King David’s daughters, who disappeared from Scripture after the incident took place.

One of the most heart-rending stories in the Bible- the rape of Tamar by her half-brother Amnon. Your poem captures the 'frozen' state in which she now lives- no, 'lives' is too vibrant a word- in which she exists.

Her torn clothing, a sign of grief, along with the ashes on her head vividly displayed her anguish at her traumatic loss as young woman, a virgin daughter of the king. Her future potential life as a wife and mother is gone, torn away, without hope of remedy.

Her father, on hearing of it, is furious....but does nothing. David is passive, inert. He provided no justice for his daughter. He didn't even provide her a home. His moral authority is gone; he's a shell of a man, deeply self-wounded by his own sins.

So, taken in by her brother, Absalom, the distraught Tamar is discouraged from even thinking about her plight- as if that were possible. She's in seclusion. Devastated.

Trying to view events from Tamar's perspective, she experiences another trauma two years later- Absalom kills Amnon in revenge and then runs away to escape vengeance. The curses pronounced by the prophet Nathan on David's house are inexorably continuing to unfold. Tamar must feel very insecure now, without her protector. And, although there is a reprieve, events become even more dire, extreme and dangerous when Absalom revolts dramatically in the most vulgar way against his father. From Tamar's perspective (if she's still alive by now, we aren't told) her whole world keeps falling further into chaos. And then Absalom too is killed. What a catastrophe.

I think, for all his faults, Absalom did care for his sister Tamar. He named his own daughter after her, which I hope brought Tamar some comfort.

There's much more could be said about this story, and I don’t want to make my post too long. I look forward to hearing others' input.

Thank you for sharing your poem with us. It's very evocative, and I've read and re-read it many times now.

edited for typo

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my poem and to share your thoughts. I don’t often have the opportunity to discuss Scripture, as my children are autistic and fellowship is, in reality, almost impossible. I hadn’t realised that Absalom named his daughter after Tamar—that feels deeply moving and meaningful. I genuinely believe that, out of everyone, he acted with the greatest honour toward her. He took her into his home, he advised her to remain quiet (which I believe was for her protection), and he avenged her when it should have been her father who stepped in. I also hadn’t fully considered how the events that followed would have compounded her suffering and made her life even harder—but you’re absolutely right. My heart breaks for her. How could it not?

Not me getting emotional this morning about Absalom naming his daughter after his sister 😭 thankyou again for bringing this to my attention!

It made me cry too. 🥺
So moving.
dear Tamar- I hope she found some peace in her life.

Incidentally, you mentioned your children are autistic. Two of my primary school aged grandchildren are also showing signs of being on the autistic spectrum, though not yet diagnosed. It can be extremely challenging to go anywhere at times. And I was myself diagnosed in my old age, two years ago, with high masking Asperger’s type autism.

While I don’t know what you’re going through I do have some understanding of how hard it is to function in church, and to fellowship with other Christians.

So big hugs to you and please do make use of this board as you already have done in this very thought-provoking post. I do hope to see more engagement from other posters.

Feel free also to private message anytime.
God bless you xx

Although Tamar went through a rape she still sounds like has energy and freshness for life. It doesn’t like the abuse crushed her spirit. She sounds alive to me still, but like she has been through something difficult.

Me, I have had difficult experiences in my life and it left a mark on my body and skin to and although I was ready to move on, my body and skin dealt with it differently and it felt like my body didn’t belong to me so much at time to. I related to what Tamar wrote about that. “Even my body knows, this does not belong to me”. “My skin remembers, though my heart tries not”. This can be difficult to in abuse.

Thanks for starting the post. It was a well written poem. It was good that it was included in the Bible and like Psalm 11 tells us, God does not like abusive relationships.

I somehow thought that ElatedAzurePlayer's poem that was posted was in the Holy Bible, but it was their own poem. It was a very good poem. I went looking for this today in the Holy Bible.

Another member Leaningontheeverlastingarms mentioned about David being inert in this. David had been through a lot and what would happen to Tamar was a prophecy told by Prophet Nathan.

God though often intervened in the justice of rape victims. If you look down in the bottom box, you can see some times this occured.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_in_the_Hebrew_Bible

Forgiveness of another can be one thing, but when your body and skin remembers, it can be something else.