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Going to church with small children

2 replies

Boppingalong · 19/09/2025 21:00

Hello! I was raised Christian and spent half my childhood in a strongly Christian country with huge churches and massive amounts for every age group from tiny babies through to women’s circles etc.

When we returned to the UK we didn’t join another church and I haven’t really been since (for about 15 years). But I have been feeling drawn back to God for the last couple of years and would really like to start going to church again, and for my children to experience Sunday school etc.

However I’m not sure where to start. We live in a rural county, lots of small beautiful churches with a predominately older congregation. This doesn’t bother me but I am worried they won’t approve of small children (4 and 1) wiggling around etc. Naturally the services will be geared towards adults and I don’t want my children to associate church and God with boredom. We have a couple of churches locally that have crèche type offerings and are in more modern buildings. I’m not sure if somewhere like this would be better? But we went along to a church playgroup today at a beautiful traditional rural church who were so thrilled to see us. They told us about messy church and other events going on a couple of times a month. I guess my question is would it be best to just go to these child led services and not go every Sunday/to the regular service? The impression I got was that it was an older congregation. Part of me thinks they may enjoy seeing children in the church but I am worried about interrupting other people’s worship. I read about declining church numbers and worry that these beautiful rural churches will have to close due to low attendance. Our closest one has in the last year. A friend of mine has said her church would love to run children’s events but can’t/do because there are no children which made me sad.

It’s frustrating because I want to raise my children knowing God but would also like the opportunity to worship myself. Perhaps this is just not the season for it though?

My partner and I are also not married or engaged though do plan to eventually. I am worried about judgement because of this too. My partner would not describe himself as Christian and has said he will go to church “for me” but isn’t overly keen on the idea. Am I best doing the children’s services as a family and leaving him at home with the children for the non-child services a couple of times a month?!

Any advice would be very much appreciated.

God bless you all.

OP posts:
FuzzyPuffling · 19/09/2025 21:27

Try it all! Messy church, for sure, but also try some of the other services on offer. You'll soon find out what suits you best, and where you feel most welcome.

I've been a regular at several churches in recent years ( moving house) and all have welcomed young families with open arms.

And none, not one, has been in the least bit judgemental about non- marrieds.

God bless you all.

ChristmasStars · 19/09/2025 21:42

What @FuzzyPuffling said.

Try anything that looks like it has potential and see where you get a good welcome. When my children were small we went to our village church monthly messy church sessions but also weekly to a church that was more our style where the children went in a crèche then on to Sunday school. All of it was good.

I hope you find something that really suits you. Great that you're looking.

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