Misheard Lyrics

[MargaretThursday]

After reading a misheard lyric on the other thread I wondered whether anyone has any funny misheard lyrics from them or their child.

There's the traditional story:
"I've called my teddy Gladly after the song Gladly the cross-eyed bear" (Gladly, the Cross I bear)

When I was little I was singing a song from school:
"In the morning early I go down to the sea,
And I hear the waves on the shore.
Alison, and Alison."
The last line was actually "I listen, and I listen."

One that made me chuckle was ds.
We were doing the song "Everyone needs compassion" in the All Aged Worship at Spring Harvest and the worship leaders introduced action songs for the chorus:
"Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever
Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave"

And they asked the children to think of a good action for conquering the grave. The children came up with a kick.

So I heard ds singing later
"He rose and kicked over the grave
Jesus kicked over the grave"

Which actually probably meant much the same thing to a four year old 🤣

Anyone got any other misheard lyrics?

I thought the three kings were from a place called Orian-Tar.

And in the old child's prayer Gentle Jesus the line 'pity my simplicity' I thought was 'pity mice in Plicity' reasoning that 'Plicity' was some sort of purgatory or maybe even hell, for mice.

I developed the habit of overthinking very early on!

There's a Crowded House song which says "tales of war and waste" which I managed to hear as "tales of water and wine" and thought it was a reference to the Eucharist.

My grandmother was also the headmistress of my C of E infants school. One day, she stopped the class mid Creed and asked them (us? never sure if this included me ) to repeat a line.The whole class dutifully chanted, 'suffered under the concious violet'
(I can't imagine infants being expected to recite the Apostles Creed today)

That reminds me of the creed line:

"On the third day he rose again, according to the scriptures."

I thought this was doubting it really happened, but the scriptures said so. So we were adding a sort of disclaimer: A bit like "The Famous Five won again, according to Enid Blyton."

"He rose again, in accordance with the scriptures" makes much more sense.

I also as a child rather liked the line "we have left undone those things that ought to be done, and there is no health in us" although I rather thought they were talking about shoelaces as something that could come undone...

And the line "he spake by the prophets" I just thought was a typo. 🤣 I was surprised when we got a new prayer book they hadn't corrected it.

DS told me once that his favourite song was "The Dark Settee" when I told him i didn't know that one he said "yes you do, it goes ' I am the Lord of the Dark settee" (I am the lord of the dance said he)

My brother used to solemnly shake hands and say "pleased to be with you" (peace be with you)

A friend who was a vicar, told me that her DD got really upset once in church and when asked why said "because every week we pray for the Jesus tortoise and it never comes"

A family member when young thought the third line of the Lord's Prayer was "Hallo'd be thy name", ie Hello God!

I’ve heard Harold be thy name as a misheard lyric before

My son proudly sang ‘the little George Jesus’ in the Sunday School Nativity’s away in a manger. The vicar was laughing and said he had done it in every ‘rehearsal’ but she didn’t have the heart to correct him.

Oh, and my charming uncle once taught his much younger brother that instead of Noel Noel Noel Noel born is the King of Israel, he had to sing ‘oh hell oh hell’ 🤣🤣🤣 of course he naively did it, and Gran (vicar’s wife) wanted to die on the spot.