Do you have to go to church?

[SpirallingInMyMind]

I hope this is the right place to post, I know that there is a philosophy and religion board but I'm really hoping to learn from Christians and there seem to be some very thoughtful and knowledgeable Christians here!

Even though I was raised in a Christian house, I turned from god at an early age and am not very knowledgeable. Lately I have been longing to learn and would really like to have a relationship with god and grow my faith in Jesus. My biggest trouble is that I suffer terribly with social anxiety. Even the school run is a huge strain on me and I really don't think I'm going to be able to make the leap of going to a church. Deep down I would love to go and I have lovely memories of that feeling of community and togetherness in the church but I feel completely trapped within these feelings and it's only getting worse.

So my question is, as a Christian, do you think attending church is a necessity in being Christian and having a true relationship with god?
Also another question I have is regarding the bible and how you read yours. Do you read yours like any other book, start to finish? So genesis through to revelation. Or do you pick a particular book to read through before moving on to another book? Or just search for chapters/verses each day that you feel will help you?

I'm so sorry if these are silly questions but I don't have anyone in my life I can ask and I'm sorry if I've worded my post poorly, I also get anxious posting and my mind goes blank! But I really appreciate anyone who can offer any insight.

I don't think it is necessary to have a relationship with God. But o find the structure really helps. And as a Catholic I need the sacraments.

Yes, you need to be part of a faithful, bible-teaching church (and get baptized and become a member):
-in the letter to the Hebrews we're commanded not to give up meeting together
-much of the New Testament makes it clear that to be a Christian is to be part of the church
-you need older (in the faith) Christians to teach you and encourage you
-you'll be able to serve and encourage other Christians

Yes! To reading the Bible and memorizing scripture.

-scripture needs to be understood in context, so try to avoid going for random verses
-the Explore bible notes are excellent. In depth but very clear.
-God's Big Picture, and Dig Deeper are excellent books which will teach you how to understand the Bible
-you could use the Fighter Verses app to help you memorize scripture

God bless you and keep you on this journey.

I sympathise lots. It's not always easy to belong to a church for a variety of reasons, and you can be a believer whilst still searching for a church.

In your circumstances I would start visiting churches online, to find a good faithful Bible-teaching church. You will be able to listen to sermons online and get a good feeling for whether they are offering you what you need. I would then email the pastor to discuss your situation. They may have a prayer buddy system, where you can meet regularly with one person to talk, read the Bible and pray. They also will have small groups who meet midweek, usually in someone's house, or eg a women's group. If you had a prayer buddy, they would take you along to thesewhen you felt ready.

Belonging to a church means joining a family, who look after each other. It doesn't have to mean just going along to a service on a Sunday morning. Contact the pastors to see what they suggest.

If you are not sure where to start, and don't want to reveal your home town on here, do message me with your approximate area. I can see whether I can recommend a kind and welcoming church near you . . .

Re Bible reading, I read a whole book at a time, over a week or two, but not necessarily starting at the beginning and then going all the way through.

So, I would start with Genesis - there are some great stories in there - but then switch to Marks gospel and the New Testament afterwards. I find having good Bible notes is very helpful too
Have a look at the Bible Project online - there are clear introductions to each book - or I find the Enduring Word online commentary helpful. It's free and full of helpful explanations and comments.

And you will be able to listen to previous sermon series on church websites, so can read a book of the Bible and listen to those sermons.

Hi, it’s so hard when social anxiety makes visiting places like church super hard, I really feel for you.

Church is about being with a family and pursuing God together, but there really are lots of ways you can do that to make it easier for you.

As a pp said, lots of churches do online services now so you can have a look at those. But more importantly, lots of churches are small which might make things easier, and many have small groups that you can be part of to get that sense of community that you love the idea of.

I have a friend who has huge sensory issues and she cannot cope with a live service on a Sunday but loves her small group so does life with them really, and watches the service from home. It can be done! And I think more churches are realising how needed this is. So do have a look around and use websites to check things out before approaching the churches to find out about small groups etc.

I think the biggest thing to remember is that God knows exactly how you feel and will have a great solution for you ☺️

As for reading the Bible, you can read whatever you like whenever you like! I love Psalms - I think you can find a psalm to express anything of how you feel at any given moment which is so helpful! But all of it is great. Some great advice on some helpful aids in previous posts. But feel free to explore and have fun too. Luke is great for reading about Jesus and very Christmassy at the beginning so quite timely right now!

So really, you can have fun with the Bible and use apps and ideas from previous posts.

I hope this is helpful and you feel like you can explore things safely. Xx

I don’t go to church much. I dislike the vibe from the senior priest at my local church. There is another one that’s too modern for me. If the priest above ever moves on I’ll give it another go but they’re power hungry and political so it’s not for me right now.

Sorry, so to answer your OP I don’t think going to church or not makes a different to personal faith.

This
I don’t attend church but have a strong faith

A church is the people not the building. You can be a Christian without attending a church but we are all part of the Christian body and we all benefit from share life together and supporting each other.

A lot of churches have online live services these days, so you could watch each week and be part of the community that way. My church also has smaller midweek groups where people meet to pray and do a small Bible study. Again some of these are online on zoom.
In terms of Bible reading, I am a bit rubbish at it to be honest but when I do, I do a guided Bible study like those on the lectio 365 app. Or sometimes I just read a small section and think and pray about it.

You have agency and can decide whether you go to church or not.

If you talk to most Christians, they will say that going to church and being in a community is vital. Spending time with other Christians teaches you about the Christian faith, edifies and encourages you. A lot of people will say they can experience God by going into the country and marveling in Creation - I suspect that this type of worship is for a season, rather than a whole life.

As for reading the bible, if you are new to it, it can be overwhelming. This might sound funny, but I think the Lion Children's Bible is a good place to start, as you can whizz through the key characters and stories throughout the Old and New Testaments without getting bogged down with explanations. After that, there are so many help books. Alpha's bible in 30 days is good, as it takes you through 30 main events, and explains what they mean in our lives today. Another great way is to join a bible study group, where you can discuss a book of the bible in a non-threatening way.

It is hard to be a Christian on your own. We are about community but that doesn't mean you can't look for a community that works for you. Why not try some online services so that you can get a feel for the community? It sounds counter intuitive but sometimes it is easier to blend with a crowd. I go to cathedral services when I'm off duty where no one expects anything of me and I can be anonymous.

As far as reading the Bible goes it is a library and not a book so there is no need to start with Genesis although you will find many familiar stories there. Mark is the earliest and perhaps the most accessible of the gospels. The psalms are poems and hymns of praise and lament that are thousands of years old. Tom Wright has written a series of books called X for everyone. I've got the gospel ones in my bookshelf and I find them helpful when writing bible study material for the parish.

Personally, I need to go to church regularly.
That doesn't mean that I always am in tune with people there though. I love the phrase we use
'Though we are many, we are one body, because we share the body of Christ'
It also leads onto your question about reading the Bible. We have 3 readings every Sunday, and I will often return to a particular reading to look at it further.
Last week there was one which I didn't understand from Micah. The Bible Project site is excellent at helping with this.
Sorry, this is very rambling, but, in the end, you must do you.
But, yes, I think it's very important to attend church regularly.

I was singing in the choir but took a break from all church services until even the end of January. For 6 months did not make a personal friend and people are talking to me, but does not feel I have community.

The priest is ok but is strangely tense and rude to me. He has a condition after a health issue and I used an idiom once when asking him a question which contained that word. I have just seen him and could not see the tick on his face. My husband told me later that the poor man has a tick after an illness. I was speechless. I just used an idiom without seeing his condition.

He is rude to me, speaks tensely and short to me and when I ask a question , just reply and leaves me with not even more kind word: like, thank you for asking or that is ok, we will be in touch etc. I don't know to who to say this story for them to try to talk to him but I don't want to tell anyone the story because they might be the wrong person and actually make a completely different story of what I said.

so I leave the man in peace and there me is, no church.

I go to church when I am well enough to do so it just under two minutes from me. I have multiple reasons for going.

Someone is up to them..some reasons..take the Sacraments the Holy Eucharist which Christ said should done in his memory with frequency day given. Miracles can happen after taking this for I healed from mine not even yet returned to my home just in the driveway of the my issues with chest went into the air moves on.

If you want to be baptised probably it only be done in a church...baptised to a part of body of Christ. Also if you want to develop Gifts of the Holy Spirit they start for majority at church even if you do not attend always and everyone is different for God knows our unique situation who can and cannot etc for their unique reasons....We are the branches etc etc as Christ said.

There are more reasons.. I love a place of sanctuary and to get away from the world some withdrawal.

I love Holy water and get that church for I have never been to Lourdes ever based in London. It can be made Holy anywhere but Lourdes is most worthy and without doubt beautiful.

Church leaders offer me fantastic support above and beyond. Appaluses.

Christ attended Church Luke 4:16-21 to worship his Father enough said again me the greatest of explemar.

Before Eucharist in Temple there was the Bread of Prescence and then Christ our new as Christians so to partake a gift from God and it will always be.

I cannot edit my post run of time but I meant to type.. the Eucharist no fixed time for its use is given to be done in Jesus' memory., I like to take mine at least once weekly if possible.

I'm the same, and tbh I feel further away from God when in a church than I do anywhere else.

Maybe try making a habit of watching a weekly service or Mass on YouTube?

You will hear selected readings from the Old Testament and New Testament and hear the congregation praying and singing, and a homily from the presider.

In the RC church, you'll hear the entire Bible over the course of a three year cycle of Sunday readings, psalms, and gospels.

Your post is not silly at all, and I want to acknowledge how brave you are for sharing something so personal, especially when dealing with social anxiety. It’s clear that you have a genuine desire to grow in your faith, and that’s such a beautiful and important first step.
To answer your question about church, while attending a church can be incredibly helpful for fellowship, teaching, and spiritual growth, it is not the only way to cultivate a relationship with God. Christianity is ultimately about your personal relationship with Jesus, which you can nurture through prayer, reading the Bible, and seeking Him in your daily life. If attending a church feels too overwhelming right now, you could consider starting small. Many churches offer online services or small home groups where the setting is less intimidating. Over time, as your faith grows, you may find your comfort zone expanding. Regarding reading the Bible, there’s no one "right" way to approach it. Some people like to read it from Genesis to Revelation, but many others prefer to focus on specific books or themes. For example, the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John) are a wonderful starting point to learn about Jesus and His teachings. The Psalms can provide comfort and encouragement, while books like Proverbs offer practical wisdom. You could also use a devotional or Bible reading plan to guide you, especially if you're unsure where to begin. Finally, please don’t be too hard on yourself. God knows your heart, and He sees your efforts and your struggles. Take everything one step at a time, and know that there’s no need to rush. You are deeply loved by Him, and He will guide you in this journey, even through the challenges. If you ever feel like you’re struggling alone, there are many Christians (online and offline) who would be happy to walk alongside you in your faith.

I understand your situation. I used to really feel at home in my church, but their new LED light give me migraines so I can't go any more. All the churches have the lights so my churchgoing had end really very suddenly.

It's pretty rubbish tbh. I would like to be in a church but there is nothing for me now.

No, you don’t have to go to church physically. Many churches continue with Zoom options (and during the lockdown many non church people were locking in with camera switched off and and anonymous name). This might suit you.

my ds has expressed an interest in becoming a Christian - he’s given up doe to the total lack of welcome both with the Christian union at his university (was a closed shop) and others.

people say just find a church but do you know how hard that is.

totally unsurprised that church attendance is falling. Totally unwelcoming.

A Christian is someone who has been brought into a body of believers. So meeting with other Christians regularly to hear God's word taught is literally an expression of who you are. To not meet together with your brothers and sisters is to contradict your whole identity as someone who is part of the body of Christ.

I am Anglican. My view is you don't need to attend church regularly but you really should be there on Christmas Day, Easter Sunday and Good Friday. I also think taking communion and recieving absolution is important, and you need to be there for that. The service at most Anglican churches is out of a book, so there doesn't have to be much social interaction, especially if you go to an early service or one during the week when there won't be many people. All of them teach the Bible: there are three readings and the sermon should address them.

Regarding reading the Bible: I don't recommend sitting down and reading it through. You could follow the Church lectionary or pick a guide that takes you through e.g. the epistles of Paul. There are lots of guides out there.

I personally don't think you have to regularly attend church or spend huge amounts of time reading the bible (in whatever format and whether you read sequentially or jumping around as long as you live a Christian life, how you live matters more so loving god, loving thy neighbour specifically supporting the poor and vulnerable without expecting anything in return. I feel closer to god running the soup kitchen than reciting the Eucharistic prayer

Go to church when and if it makes sense to you.
Explore faith in the way which is right for you!

Baptism

I think may be we should have a discussion around the need for baptism for Christians. I like to blog about my faith and fact checked this with my rector at church about the need to be baptised. She said it is important in the Christian journey to be baptised of the Spirit. Christians need this, you may read differently online and a lot will be personal opinion and many will be placating themselves. My rector would only tell me the truth. Ok, after receiving Baptism you may not attend all the time or regularly but it should be something you should be looking at as a Christian.