Chronic constipation (movicol) and school attendence figures - Need some support and advice

[Hangingbellyofbabylon]

dd is in reception and will be 5 in August. She has had chronic constipation for around a year now. Being treated with movicol and senakot and as those of you with children in this situation will know it is a very delicate balancing act.. if she gets too bunged up we have trips to the loo every 20 mins and just a smudge of sticky 'tar' on her bottom which she cannot clean up herself. On other days for some reason (not clear but maybe diet related) she seems to have very loose bowels and again, loads of accidents as she doesn't have warning so doesn't get to the loo.

We are under the paediatrician at the hospital for her constipation and I do worry about her missing school but am not going to send her on the days when she will have accidents. It is not fair on her, she is already well aware of what's going on and I will not let her self-esteem be further battered by letting her risk pooing her pants at school. She's also had a couple of the usual d+v bugs which has meant unfortunatly that her attendence has dipped below 90% (it's 88.4%).

In something totally separate the head teacher made a comment on a note about her attendence and it has really pissed me off. She loves school and is doing really well but she does have a medical problem. The school don't like absence notes and get us to phone in but I don't know if they log the reason for absence or just put 'medical'. I feel like I have no evidence for dd's absence now and if and when it goes below 85% and the EWO becomes involved then I don't know how to tackle it.

Has anyone been in this situation and have you got any advice? I'm going to mention it at our next hospital appointment as well. I just don't think until you've been there you have any idea how much poo issues rule your whole life- constipation sounds trivial but when it rules everything you do and everywhere you go it is really really tough.

ignore it.

I have been there with J, still there in fact, only now we have the croup issues too so his attendance is down to 79%.

I really truly think you are doing the right thing with keeping her home when she is likely to have accidents. not only is it better for her esteem, it is also nicer for the school, not having to clean her up. (not that they should be arsy about it BTW, and I am not implying that....it was how I felt with regards to J when he was in reception).

and I really truly understand how much you say it rules your life. each morning that J states he has tummy ache my heart sinks a little.

do not forget, she is still very small. she has a lot of years of school ahead of her to catch up in if she needs it, and if you cocntinue as you are, she will catch up easily. you send her because of pressure from the head, you will possibly end up with an unhappy little girl on your hands who will stop trying at school as she hates it, and that would be worse, far worse, than the possible bad attendenc right now.

I speak from experience BTW of an older one I forced to school, hence my relaxed attitude now with J.

oh, and I have had two of mine with attendences below the 85%. I have not been investigated as yet.

that said, I did panic and get the paed to write in to cover us, which helped immensly. who are you under (assuming you are at PGH?)

Hi psycho - yes we are at PGH but not sure who our actual paed is - we seem to see someone different each time. I hear the dreaded Dr black is back... we're seeing her at the end of april so will interesting to see how things are.

no Dr black is taking medical retirement due to her illness returning. I had an appointment with her 3wks ago and they are telling all her patients now that she is too ill to return.

she is being covered at the moment by a lovely doc, altho some of his veiws are slightly old fashioned to say the least.

if the school is getting to you, would your GP write to them a cover note for her medical files at school??

if your dd is 4 then legally she doesn't need to be in school yet (I think it's full time from the term after their 5th birthday)

does her %age attendance really matter when she's below compulsory school age?

I can understand why it's upsetting you though. Have you explained in detail to the school? if you have it's bad that they're not more understanding

psycho is it dr clow still? he was really nice but way off the mark with dd2 - basically totally played down her cerebral palsy. I was hoping for someone a bit more realistic as we are starting the statementing process soon and wanted a realistic report. oh well, will start the battle.

psycho is it dr clow still? he was really nice but way off the mark with dd2 - basically totally played down her cerebral palsy. I was hoping for someone a bit more realistic as we are starting the statementing process soon and wanted a realistic report. oh well, will start the battle.

I know what you mean about it ruling your life my dd has chronic constipation on movicol but she can with hold for england, she will only have a poo in a pull up in her bedroom stood on a yellow box! We have just had to cut a holiday short cos she wouldnt poo on holiday and was on day 6 of withholding so had to come home for her to poo! People dont understand about the condition, my dd is scared stiff of poo

She doesn't even need to be in full time education until the term after her 5th birthday. Our local primary actually encourages you to do part time until this stage if you feel they won't cope full time.

I've been to hell and back with this situation. My DD has disability which means she is both doubly incontinent and suffers with chronic constipation. Last year was the worst year for us, the meds she had been on stopped working as well, we were in the process of trying lots of new things and having to get dosages etc right. Aswell as suffering horrendous rashes because of her bowels Her attendance dropped to 60 something % that school year.
I had medical notes covering all of her absences of three days or more (which is what school had told me to do) Then ewo starting coming out to us, and wasn't happy. Was convinced I was 'exaggerating' the severity of her illness. The ammount of times I had to sit and listen to him saying yet again 'well of course she couldn't possibly be '
In the end, despite doing everything they told me to They took me to court
I won, of course, the whole thing was ridiculous. The magistrate even tore strips off the ewo in court for being an arse

But these situations can get very out of hand very quickly given the wrong ewo and a medical condition he doesn't or won't understand.
(oh and the ewo started sending letters to me before DD was at compulsary age)
In your shoes I would cover my back from the get go and get a medical note for every absence whether the school request it or not. Keep them yourself, so they can be produced if needed.
I'm V V cynical about the whole system and don't trust anybody in it to make informed or rational decisions any more!

Ds (6) had 4 days off a few weeks back because of 'poo' issues-major overflow issues and there was NO way he was going to school in that state.Also under paed at the local hospital and have been for the last 4 yrs.

I expect he will have more time off in the future as it's very tricky to get his meds 100% correct-it simply can't be helped imo.It's a bowel condition.

I'm not having problems with school commenting on his attendance at the moment.I am having problems with them allowing him to have his meds.I'm fuming with them.

As a teacher and having had a 13 year old with ME/CFS whose attendance has at times been under 20 per cent I think you need to go into school when you are not fuming and have a full and frank discussion with them. It sounds like they haven't 'got it' which is no excuse but is very unhelful to you. Does your DS take his own meds or does he need help? I only ask because again that might be an easily solveable issue. As far as attendance is concerned it sounds like you have a 'jumpy' head who is overly worried by league tables(not their fault but attendance is a biggie atm).Just make sure you have up to date letters from paed. It will be fine. He's only a little chap with a chronic condition doing his best and so are you.
HTH

Sorry HBoB just re-read your post and see you have a DD not a DS. Apologies. Just think 'her' instead of 'his' and the post still applies!

hanging, yes, same doc.

I know what you mean, he is very old fashioned in his veiws I found. lovely with it, but not up to the mark on 'todays' issues. ignored my issues with J, spoke about his allergies rather than his pooing probs.

I was just however glad not to have the grunting, head shaking and nodding woman who ignores what you say and shakes when you ask for a second opinion

Hanging - I have similar concerns re:EWO - DS's SN aren't physical but he does seem vulnerable to ever D & V bug going and got measles last term so his attendance rate isn't great. I did end up with EWO letter last term - but all it said was - attendance should be 95%, important to attend blah blah blah - so just because you end up on EWO radar doesn't mean they actually do anything scary iyswim. I had a useful tip from saggar yesterday (she works either as EWO or in that department) - rather than make your GP write a note, an appointment card from the receptionist is enough from EWO point of view to back up medical reason absence. saggar also said that copies of prescriptions would also suffice (so if you keep a copy of the meds packaging, that will have the date on it).

It is incredibly frustrating having to think of covering one's backside - DS has yet another D & V bug (got send home yesterday after a poo accident, poor thing) - so tomorrow I will probably take him to GP, as much to cover my arse than because I am particularly concerned (though maybe a stool sample will show up something).

Thanks for all of the advice, I saw the GP today to get a repeat prescription for dd and he was really good, said copies of all the hospital letters etc and basically said they are being ridiculous and not to let them get to me . I think I'm going to gather all of my evidence then make an appointment to go into school and talk about it all. The class teacher is fine and gets it but the info obviously hasn't been passed on to the Head etc.