Scaryboo, sorry to hear you're going through such an upsetting and stressful time. I could give you information from the other side - I was diagnosed with epilepsy when I was 13 or 14. I started taking medication - Epinuten (sp?) didn't really work for me, but I was fine with Epilim, which I took for a couple of years. Apparently a lot of children grow out of it. In my situation not the case, but even when I stopped the medication I stopped having seizures as I could "feel" it coming the previous day and would sleep all day and then it passed. With the exhaustion of a new baby I've (with the support of my neurologist obviously) started taking a very low dose Lamotrogine again, but aim to stop again in a couple of months. I have no side effects from the medications btw, am just lazy to take pills, vitamins included.
I'm rambling, but what I mean to say: having been diagnosed with epilepsy had absolutely no negative effect on my life. I realise some others have a harder time and sometimes uncontrollable seizures, but the fact that my parents accepted (ok, as a parent now I assume they just pretended, I would be really upset if it happens to my son too) this as a normal part of life meant I accepted it as the same.
Unless your daughter starts having uncontrollable seizures more often, don't keep her out of school. Because it's something unpredictable it helped having the rest of my life as normal. Stress is also a trigger in my case - would it be possible for her to start doing yoga / pilates or something equally relaxing if stress affects her too?
Oh yes, last thing - no family history in my case either, no scars on my brain (injury ruled out), but definitely irregular eeg patterns.
Sorry for the essay, I just wanted to let you know it won't ruin her life. Please feel free if you want to ask anything (not sure if I'll be of much use, but sometimes just talking helps if you're upset, doesn't it?) Good luck with the tests. It will tire her out for the day, but not much different to that "after exam" kind of feeling where you just want to sit down with a coffee and watch rubbish tv.