Hi I have a 11 year old boy who has had recurrent problems with his ears from an early age like your Little person. It started with failed hearing test at age 18 months then progressed to glue ear which caused speech problems and all sorts of other problems...on doctors advise we too had the grommets fitted which resulted in a perforated ear drum for him at age 4 when the grommet came out after an ear infection.
He has had the following years since suffering with recurrent ear infections and discharging ears and is a regular Antibiotic Junkie!!
After much deliberation by his doctors it was decided to refer him for the Myringoplasty operation at age 10 he had it done last december. on the follow up appointment it was confirmed that the operation had failed and he still had the perforation in his ear. Having made loads of investigations into the surgery and done some homework prior to him having surgery I concluded that it is generally not recommended in smaller children due to the narrowness of tubes and failure rate being higher.
I have just revisited the ENT doctor and they are now saying he must have the op again as it will ultimately affect the quality of his life as he gets older.
All I can say to you is that having been through the process and op with my son I would be having second thoughts and some real concerns if it was recommended to a child as young as yours due to the aftermath of operation the recovery period and failure rate being higher risk.
My own personal experience of this ear problem in my son has been frustrating to say the least, as recurrent ear infections have meant, as i am sure your child has been, that he has spent a lot of time in pain or with an embarrassing discharge from his ear that on occasions just refused to clear up.
However, being on the recovery side of the operation which was traumatic for him they have now confirmed that he will need the operation again and we personally have elected to put this off for another year untill he is 12 or 13. After the operation it was apparent that even age 10 is still a little on the young side just due to the restrictive activities that are imposed.
My personal opinion is this. It is frustrating when you have followed the advice of the doctors and things dont improve, but this complaint is a routine type thing in the doctors eyes as they see this every day....that's where we mums take their advice at face value. I would recommend that if you have access to the net. Google the operation and read..read..read. Be imformed about the procedure and then make a judgement for yourself as to whether you wish to put a child as young as 2 through the operation that is more at risk of failing.
My Son Swims. all be it that he was a slightly late starter but now even with the perforation, he swims every week and regularly Surfs at Woolacombe and Croyde, so far we have been able to keep his ear dry with silicone type ear plugs that are comfortable. Showers and hair washing were dealt with by way of cotton wall in Vaseline....when we or he remembered!
I know that age 12 seems a long way ahead but having weighed up all the pros and cons I think it would be worth the wait for your little one to be given the best chance of success at the first attempt of the operation as the whole experience was traumatic and my son is still expressing to us that he dose not wish to have the operation again as the pain is still raw in his thoughts!!
I can sympathise with you for wanting the condition cleared up, but sometimes protection and precaution are better than the cure that can fail.
please if i can give you more information i would be happy to do so