At the end of my tether

[Howie119]

Okay so I’m a first time mum, I struggle with autism (suspected) and OCD (known). My LO is 10 months old. We started weaning at 6 months and they’ve been struggling with constipation ever since. We’ve been on Movicol for close to 40 days, maybe over that now and we’re on 1 satchet a day. At first my LO took it no problems, and after about 2 weeks, started to refuse it. (EDIT: even during this two weeks though there was no sign of improvement). Now they’re only passing stool every 5 days, large, firm (but squishable) and then all the other days either straining and passing nothing or smear amounts. When my LO is going, they will only go in the bath and they physically sob everytime they go so every 5 days I have to hold my LO as they pass a bowel movement and sob and this has been going on for months. I’ve been taking them to the drs every week at this point and they all keep telling me to increase fibre (my LO is under a dietician, egg allergy, and they’re so happy with their diet, mainly veg, meats etc) on top of that I’ve been giving, pears, prunes, flaxseed, chia seed, raspberries, lentils, chickpeas, black beans and broccoli. You tell me that isn’t increasing fibre? And today’s drs appointment really knocked my confidence as a FTM. I basically got told I’m not trying hard enough to give my LO their medicine but what am I meant to do when they spit it out, clench their mouth shut, shake it side to side, push me away etc like do you want me to strap my LO down and force them to swallow some liquid? What more can I physically do? Then I felt like they did not believe me with the diet my LO is on, gave me an entire booklet about constipation, what food to give and why I need to increase water intake and fibre because “it all starts with the diet” like I’m so angry. My LOs diet could not be more varied and nutritional. Because I’ve been trying to get movicol in them, they now refuse all their cups, refuse water and refuse the syringe. Still breastfeeding up to 8 times a day (and night). I can get some movicol in them by putting it in their food but this is obviously not the full dose and a very unreliable amount is entering my LO system. I’m just at my wits end and no one’s listening to me when I say I need help, they keep offering lactulose but it has sugar in and is just generally harsher on their little bodies than movicol.
If you’ve got to the end thank you. I could really do with some advice - am I overreacting or should I keep pushing at the drs?

It sounds like withholding but they are young to do that. But the straining could in fact be trying to keep it in, hence the smears? We had it for quite a while between about 18 months and three unfortunately. Basically she learned one poo hurt and then never willingly let another one out for months.

@luckycat888 - Yeah we’ve been told to reintroduce egg too but only when this constipation issue is dealt with so we haven’t tried yet. I have been told that some babies just struggle to adjust to handling solids but I’m just nervous that waiting until my LO is over 12 months to see if they grow out of it then it’ll just be 6 months of constant pain every few days and constant straining in between will have negative effects in the long run? Maybe it won’t though!

@MotherlandmamaI can definitely remove the seeds but I don’t even give my LO half a teaspoon, it’s literally a pinch because when they said to increase fibre then I just assumed the seeds would be good - I will remove them though because a couple of people have said this and I don’t want to be causing the constipation if the issue is literally just the seeds if that makes sense! I will try switching to lactulose as the GP today said they usually do one or the other and I’m struggling to get the movicol in LO as it is so I think I’ll switch and see if that helps first! I can definitely try different yoghurt etc but I’ve honestly tried to hide it in so many foods now! I don’t mind trying some more though !

@lordbaddinghamIt does seem like withholding but I’m not sure if it is withholding or what it is which is why I’m so stressed! Literally the minute we introduced foods the constipation started within a week or two and hasn’t improved since but my LO always seems shocked when the bowel movement happens, goes red, sobs, straightens legs like it doesn’t seem as though my LO wants to go and obviously the more they pass a bowel movement and the more it hurts, I’m worried they’ll withhold for the foreseeable !

Oh I understand the desperation. All you want to do is help them but it is just so difficult. I think it is usually one or the other but unfortunately we had to resort to the combination of the two. Hopefully, lactulose will do the trick for your little one. Another thing we added in to the diet was probiotics to support the gut so that might be another thing to try. The probiotics recommended to us were kendamil comfort drops, optibac or biogaia. Really hope it improves for you.

Oh this sounds so hard. You are actually doing an amazing job by getting support early on. I had issues from 6m with my DS and he ended up so unwell around age 2.5, and with hindsight we should have been so on it with movicol early on. I know he is tiny and it seems wrong but fruit shoots with it in can help loads. If you can try lactulose then can mix it in a little fruity yoghurt. We ended up neeeed to disimpact which was up to 12 sachets per day. Jelly, you can mix it in. Lots of luck and keep going. Ask for a referral to gastroenterology if no improvement before too long.

@Motherlandmama Yes I’m extremely desperate, it’s so hard having to hold them while they sob and it’s not even just tears it’s full blown holding breathe to then screaming, going red, snot, tears like the whole shabang and I really struggle listening to them cry, so to not be able to even help is just gut wrenching for me. And yeah if that’s what works then that’s what works! Hopefully just switching works because I’m really losing the will trying to get them to take movicol and sometimes when they do take it they just spit it out! Who knew a 10 month old could be so opinionated and feisty about it! That’s why it really stung when the GP basically implied I wasn’t trying hard enough and had to be “firmer” because “you’re an adult and they’re a child and they need their medicine” - okay but what do I do when it is point blank refusal no matter how “firm” I try to be! Anyway went on a bit of a tangent so sorry but I will try probiotics too! They have a multivitamin but I don’t think that’s the same thing - I’ll look into probiotics - thank you

My DD was a poo withholder. Started at 6 months after weaning and a couple of hard poos and that was it. Not a fun time in my life!
Anyway! She was on movicol once a day for a long time and it worked wonders - but the reason I managed to get it in to her was because I once went to pick it up and they didn't have plain they only had chocolate flavour. So I used to mix it with the correct amount of water and then mix the rest with milk and she used to think she was getting a lovely treat of chocolate milk instead of medicine!
I don't know if that flavour is still available but if it is I would highly recommend!

@acquiescence Thank you for your compassion and I’m trying! I really do want what’s best and the GP implying I wasn’t doing enough just really hurt because I’ve tried everything and I’m willing to try everything to help them go pain free! Having my LO pass a bowel movement pain free shouldn’t be something I have to beg for to get help for it! I’ll definitely try the switch to lactulose and asking for the gastro referral!

12 sachets is crazy! I hope your LO is feeling better or getting better at least! It must be awful for them x

@Jimminychristmass My LOs bowel movement isn’t even like hard! Just extremely large and sausage like so is firm but easily squashed (sounds gross sorry haha) but I’ll absolutely ask if they have chocolate flavour! That’s a very good idea ! I only have the plain Movicol and I tried it myself and it’s so salty for what ?? 😂 I will have to ask if they have it or if just switching will be better for us!

Interesting, my autistic son had this problem, lactulose worked

@bittertwistedI think I’m gonna switch to lactulose and see if it helps!