Anyone chosen to pay for MMR vaccine instead of having the new MMRv?

[lovesT]

no anti vaccines talk please! I'm doing my research.

Took my son for his 3 year 4 month jabs yesterday. For some reason hadn't fully clicked that they had added the varicella (chicken pox) vaccine to the MMR.

My daughter had the MMR but not varicella as it wasn't rolled out when she was a toddler.

I felt a bit flustered and nurse said I could go away and think about it if I felt I needed to. He had the 4 in 1 but not the MMRv.

If I could choose just the MMR I'd be happy. I know there are possible side effects of both but was planning not to have the chicken pox vaccine when it wasn't on NHS. Has anyone decided to pay for it privately and just get the MMR?

Am I over reacting? I just wasn't prepared for something different to what my daughter had and I feel like they emphasised the encephalitis rare side effect but I'm not actually sure the risk is any higher than MMR.

Ant thoughts? Anyone done similar?

*I'm not saying he won't have MMR (I would plan to go back to GP and get what they offer after research or pay privately if possible for just MMR.)

Thanks!

@Starbright102 are you someone who would recommend a chicken pox party? Would you also be out and about with a child with chicken pox?

Are you aware that chicken pox is not so mild the older you contract it. So if your DC don't get it when young it can be very painful if they get it as an adult.

DS seemed to avoid contract chicken pox whenever there were cases at his nursery or amongst his little friends (we weren't aware a vaccine was available then and not sure how available it was then anyway). If it was circulating we would avoid visiting GPs as my DF had cancer at that time. At a time we were unaware any of his peers had chicken pox we visited my parents. A day later DS came out in spots. No idea where he caught it from. We were so worried as he would have been contagious around my DF. Luckily he was fine. But if vaccine had readily been available we would have given it to DS.

I think there was a poster on here who lost her DD who had cancer as she had been exposed to someone with chicken pox, which then cause complications which she died from.

Not something `I would want on my conscience

No, I wouldnt 'recommend' anyone put their child in any place where they are likely to catch a virus such as a chicken pox party. I am not a doctor and to be honest I dont tend to make any recommendations to other parents on how they should parent their children. I can only tell people my own experiences and then its up to them to decide what to do. No one knows their own child like their own parent.

Being 'out and about' when my child had chicken pox... We still needed to go to the supermarket etc. I didnt go to the zoo or anything like that if thats what your getting at? She would have been contagious at nursery with it but I notified the nursery as soon as I was aware she had it and kept her off for the full time. I dont think i was out and about more or less than a normal person. I certainly wasnt out flaunting her chicken pox?!

Yes, i am aware it can be more painful for a child the older they get however, my child had just turned 3 so as i say, i made the decision based on what i felt was best for my child which is all any of us can do.

You seem very judgemental regarding my decision which is strange considering you also claim to have been completely unaware of a vaccine thats been readily available from high street pharmacies for the past decade. Most parents with children my childs age have not taken it privately though so im not in the minority. I expect that will change now that its in the routine schedule though.

Have you been able to find the scientific papers okay hun?

My thoughts are that I have scars from chicken pox, had shingles as a teenager and I lost my hearing due to measles so I would get my child vaccinated as soon as possible.

Thank you. I just came to ask for thoughts but it seems there are multiple people who think I'm a complete idiot and am only going to ask Mumsnet.

I won't bother coming back to this. I'm just asking for thoughts and experiences - madness right?!

The nurse literally encouraged me to take some time to look into it and gave me relevant links and leaflets (so NO, NOT JUST MUM'SNET FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO THINK I MUST BE A BIT THICK.)

My own fault, I hadn't realised it was all part of the same jab. IMAGINE wanting to look into something they're injecting into my son?! Must be an awful mum.

How do you get @mumsnetto take this down because I just don't have the mental energy for the snarky replies.

Thank you for the helpful replies. A sarcastic thanks to those who think I'm asking strangers online to tell me what to do.

Remember when we used to ask for people's experiences and have friendly conversations?

https://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/vpd/mmr/hcp/vacopt-factsheet-hcp.html

Cdc says separately is preferred for the first dose

ALSO: I've never once said I'm not getting him.vaccinated. I was looking at my options. He's so far, fully vaccinated.

@Starbright102 my DS is now an adult so as I said not sure vaccine would have been readily available when little.

Oh well, your conscious must be clear then, as you so kindly put it to me.

Chickenpox is an isolation illness. If you take your child to the supermarket with it, a pregnant woman without immunity could catch it and her baby could develop birth defects as a result. That could have been me as I didn't have immunity during my first pregnancy.

Don't do that.

But thats like saying the common cold isnt always mild for some, it can leave some seriously ill and push them to develop other things.
Indeed – and if there was a vaccine available for the common cold that had a statistically lower risk of complications than the common cold, I can assure you I'd be getting that for my child, too.

Of course you can argue not taking it carries a risk but vaccines carry risks too so that should also be considered.
Yes, which is why one should look at the statistics, see that the risk from the vaccine is lower than the risk of serious complications from chicken pox and make the sensible decision to go down the path of lower risk.

In my opinion, i made the right decision for my child.
Your opinion is evidentially and scientifically incorrect.

Anyone who manages to get a vaccine for the common cold would make even more money than the people who make weight loss jabs. The total working days lost to the common cold cost companies so much money. Not to mention it's just very uncomfortable and inconvenient.

People are being a bit "but did you die?!" about chickenpox but it's not just about preventing our children from dying. It's also about reducing severe pain and discomfort, missed school etc.

Kids are contagious before spots show so its a difficult one. My child caught chicken pox either on a Wed or Thurs and i only noticed when getting her ready for bed as it began with only a few spots on her back. She is fully toilet trained so she doesnt really require changes of clothes throughout the day or the nursery would have phoned me to collect her. She had been at nursery all day and the days prior. With regard the food shop, we live rurally and you cant get food deliveries without a few days notice and my husband works abroad regularly, we had to eat. Life isnt always perfect and people sometimes have to do things like that. Its not uncommon, its life.

The chicken pox vaccine has been given in lots of first world countries for years. My daughter paid for our oldest grandson to be vaccinated as he hadn’t caught it at 7 yrs old. I caught chicken pox at 36. It’s very very nasty in adults. I was hospitalised. It’s worse in children the older they get. I’d advise having the offered vaccination. Read up on the troubles chickenpox can bring.

There are nearly always alternatives- you do a click and collect, or ask a friend/relative to do your shop and pay them back. At the very least you go just once and stock up so you don't have to take her out again. I did click and collect when my kids had it, as the kids could stay in the car.

Your tone has changed, which I'm relieved about, as you said earlier "we weren't out more or less than a normal person". You should be out a lot, lot less than normal with infectious chicken pox. I just hope you didn't give it to a pregnant woman, that's all.

But some people just don't really think about the consequences of their actions on other people do they. I think you were probably more thoughtless than selfish.

It's totally understood that you don't go out and about with a vomiting bug or you'll spread it. And yet vomiting bugs don't cause actual birth defects, and chickenpox can, when pregnant women catch it. I just don't know how anyone can be so nonchalant about spreading it around.

I wouldnt be comfortable leaving my 3 year old in the car - infact that could potentially be an offense. My local supermarkets dont do click and collects (rural town in Scotland). When I said we werent out more or less than a normal person, i meant a normal person with a child with chicken pox. We were predominantly at home but id be lying if I said we never once left the house. Thoughtless maybe but id do the same again, if i need to get food or go to the pharmacy for creams, we dont all have help and i simply needed to go and bring my toddler with me. I wont feel bad about dealing with the practicalities of life.

I dont believe in vaccinating to help others. That might be selfish but its how I feel. My daughters friend at nursery, her mum was actually pregnant when my daughter had the chicken pox and her child would have been playing with my child. Her own unvaccinated daughter never caught the chicken pox and the mother experienced no ill effects So again these horror stories are not a given.

My children are grown up now do pre-date the vaccine. When they were small, my eldest caught it. She was fine. A week later my second child caught it, he was ok-ish but hot dome nasty infected spots. Then my baby caught it despite me bf. He was so unwell he was hospitalised.
My 4th child caught it a few years later in moving house day.
Please please have the vaccine. Medics know what they are doing.

My son was in intensive care with chicken pox for a week, not pleasant. It has had lifelong consequences for him.

DD was vaccinated.

There’s a potentially dangerous and at the least uncomfortable disease prevalent… scientists and medical professionals have spent years perfecting a vaccine so your child can avoid it. What do you do?!

honestly, anti-vaxxers are up there with the manosphere bros for stupidity

It’s such a weird British flex to have a massive hang up about wanting children to get infected with chicken pox because somehow it’s “better” than a vaccine.

GB is literally 20 years behind France, Australia & Germany & 30 years behind the US and Canada in introducing the vaccine. It’s not some experimental new drug.

Puts me in mind of the Mitford sisters' mother and her insistence that "the good body would right itself".

Didn't do Jessica much good when she and her baby contracted measles, and the baby died.

Vaccines just give a focus to some of these people who have convinced themselves that vaccines are somehow inferior to the disease themselves or some form of "cheating". They hold up the fact that nothing bad happened in their particular circumstance means that it's all scaremongering.

We don't teach people how to understand and evaluate risk, and it shows.

I would get the vaccine.

It has been around for a long time as others have said, and if the children your own DC's age are getting it, there is less chance of catching chicken pox anyway.

Even if it is not too bad as an adult, it can be very inconvenient.

When my two got chicken pox, it was absolutely horrendous. I was always told it was just a few spots and fine. It was spots literally everywhere, and they were extremely uncomfortable. They both got very ill with it and my son developed a nasty ear infection. I was quite annoyed that it was not part of the routine childhood vaccine as other countries vaccinated children. If I had known what it would have been like for them, I would have paid for it privately.

My dear friend's daughter got the chickenpox at 11 months old, just before one year of age, when a child is typically eligible to be vaccinated.

The baby had serious complications and was hospitalized for a couple of weeks, including over her first birthday. One of the problems was eye involvement, particularly on one side. My friend was terrified her daughter was going to lose her vision in one or even both eyes. Ultimately, they saved her vision, but she did end up with some permanent vision changes in one eye. She must now wear glasses.

It was never a question for my friend whether her daughter would be vaccinated, as she is a medical research scientist herself who understands the science of vaccination. Their family was just unlucky to be exposed before their daughter was of normal vaccination age.

Vaccination doesn't just protect your own child. It protects others who have not yet been vaccinated or who cannot be vaccinated. There is no way to predict whether your child (or the children to whom they pass the virus) will be the one who suffers a terrible complication.