Mum at breaking point - 13 week old won’t stop crying

[VF2025]

Hi,
I have a 13 week old daughter who has been extremely unsettled, almost constantly, since about 2 weeks old. I am almost certain it’s colic, having had an older daughter who suffered from it. I thought by the 3 month mark we would be over the worst of it but things keep getting worse.

My 13-week old is formula fed, on Gaviscon and Omeprazole, and I’ve also changed her milk from Kendamil to HiPP organic (after reading that it’s gentler on the gut). The GP is in agreeance that she’s suffering from silent reflux but was confident the medication would do the trick. It isn’t touching the sides. He also said if she had a milk allergy she would be presenting more symptoms I.e: rash, diarrhoea etc. My baby’s bowel movements are slow, but of no concern.

The crying can be bad in the daytime - but it’s especially from the hours of 6pm to 10.30pm that she’s really going for it. It’s definitely impacting my mental health. I do have a supportive husband who shares the load and we do all the usual stuff to try and calm her down. She falls asleep around 10ish after being so exhausted from all the sobbing.

To me she appears in pain at this time of night. Sometimes she resorts to cluster feeding (even at this late age) and every night is a battle to try and soothe her. I often go to bed with my ears ringing.

What I want to ask is: a) has anyone had a successful milk allergy diagnosis when their baby didn’t present all of the symptoms?

Also, b) can colic go on for longer than 3-4 months? Is there anything I can be doing?

many thanks in advance from one burnt out mum x

Couldn't read this and not reply- it's 12 years since I was in your position and I still remember it!

Personally believe colic can persist up to 6 months, and it's to do with how quickly a certain enzyme is produced to digest lactose in milk. We found coleif helpful, added to each feed broke down the lactose.
We also tried to lie him on his back and cycle his legs to help with the discomfort. Sorry if you know all this already

I know many say 13 weeks is the turning point and it may well change any day, but sometimes it just takes a little longer. I would say lack of rash diarrhoea etc is a good sign that nothing like actual allergies are at play. Maybe the disturbed sleep is causing the "witching hour " as we used to call it to go on a bit longer than the usual three months. I'm sure you're exhausted physically and mentally at this point but if you can face getting out on the fresh air around 4ish you may be able to preempt that few hours or crying and break the cycle

Above all remember you're most likely nearly there so be kind to yourselves and you'll fingers crossed soon be through this stage. Unmumsnetty hugs to you xx

Hi op. Sorry you’re going through it.
My first had CMPA, it wasn’t obvious at first but at around 3 months she came up with a huge rash over her body. I cut all dairy and soy and it went away.

I'm so sorry to hear you're having such a rough ride ❤️ as soon as I was reading this my first thought was CMPA. My DS has a CMPA and didn't have any other symptoms than mucousy poo which alternated with constipated poos. She sounds like she is really struggling with what could be silent reflux. People often assume that reflux is always being sick but it's entirely possible for there to be silent reflux which just causes pain, particularly in CMPA babies. Reflux isn't an illness it's a symptom of something else and very often that's an intolerance.

The talk about cluster feeding makes me wonder if you are BF? If so I'd recommend going dairy free and seeing if it makes any improvement. If you are FF then go back to the GP and explain you would like to try a hydrolyzed formula like pepti 1.

Sending love- I went through exactly what you describe with me DS and it was awful xx

One have mine had silent reflux the screaming didn’t really stop until after she weaned. Saying that she is lactose intolerant since teen years 🧐

Big jugs, it’s horrific when they barely sleep and scream most of their waking time.

They cluster feed and the suckling is soothing.

Go back to the GP and ask for an amino-acid formula. Both DS and DD have CMPA and they didnt have all of the typical symptoms. Don't let them fob you off with hydrolysed formula - it still has dairy in it, just broken down. Both of mine were completely different babies within 24 hours.

She may have “silent reflux” for which immediate relief comes with ranitadine prescription. If this is the case, she will outgrow the condition as she gets a bit older. Personal experience.

Both of my boys had colic. Ds1 grew out of it at 12-13 weeks. Ds2 kept going for just over 6 months.

Colief saved my sanity. We had to use it for every feed. It alleviated the problem, but every now and then we would try a feed without and the screaming would start again immediately.

Best of luck.

Hey. My 2nd was like this for absolutely ages... I tried everything but she was just very unsettled. In the end each time she could move she got more settled... so rolling, crawling, walking etc. She is now 2 and is honestly the happiest little thing! Of course there could be something else going on so it's worth trying, but in our case was just one of those unexplained things! X

Thank you all for the replies! I am going to go back to the GP and see if they’ll actually see her etc. So far they’ve just taken my call and sent the prescription over to the pharmacy.

I do wonder if she has an allergy/intolerance but because she’s showing no other signs the doctor isn’t really interested in exploring that route. Can any harm come from putting her on a dairy free/medicated formula even if she may not have any allergies? It feels like such a rough end of the deal - we should be enjoying our little ones but instead we are praying for less crying and focusing our efforts on ‘case of elimination’.

I am, like you say, praying that it will resolve itself. And of course we’re now at the teething stage so that could play a part. Thanks again everyone x