How to take something off your toddler

[Mazzy4]

hiya
i Just wondered if any of you have wrestled something off your kid after trying to get it off them. My 3 year old was in the bath and tipping all of the bubble bath out. I said he can have some but he wanted to tip all of it out. In the end I tried to take it off him and had to wrestle with him which felt awful.

then later in the same morning he bit my boob so hard. I freaked out. I told him to let go and he didn't so I pushed him away from me. I felt so awful. I said I am just going to go into another room for a minute and he ended up following me. He saw me crying in another room. I can't stop feeling awful about it. 😭.

thanks xx

Sometimes you do just have to grab things off them, like you did. Pouring all the bubble bath is not only wasteful but also dangerous, he could have slipped very easily so you were keeping him safe. Pushing someone away is a natural reaction to being bitten too. It's okay that these things happen you just need to repair after, explain things once he's calm and give him a cuddle but don't be hard on yourself you haven't done anything wrong.

Given the two incidents and how to deal with them. You pour the right amount of bubble bath into a plastic cup, tea pot whatever, and he gets to pour that into the bath. You both get what you want.

Re the biting, he needs to see he has hurt you. If he bites another child he may end up with a hard slap or having his hair pulled to move his head away so he needs to learn we do not bite and you give him no attention for unacceptable behaviour. Name the behaviour and the emotion that goes with it. Tell him he hurt you, make the same noise he does when he gets hurt.

The main thing you need to know is that we cannot make our children happy all the time otherwise they would never go to bed and eat chocolate until they were sick. You parent to raise them as good friends, to be able to to take turns, to share. Sometimes you have to pin them down to take medicine or brush their teeth, sometimes you have to wrestle things out of their hands, sometimes that is every, bloody, day. It doesn't make you bad it makes you a good parent because you are there to guide them through the day and whatever it throws up. Of course it feels awful at times but they have to learn. Be kind to yourself.