Is any/all of this normal for a 4.5 month old?

[jc2025]

DS is coming up to 4.5 months old and I’ve seen some changes in him.

He seems more miserable. Sometimes he’ll wake up crying, other times he will cry and we can’t console him. If it’s really bad then he won’t even accept the boob.

Leading up to and over Christmas, he was making some lovely vowel sounds and was ‘talking’ back to us quite a bit. The vowels have basically gone. Now, we’re getting the odd squeal and some guttural vocalisations. Almost like moaning or groaning.

We’ve described him as a ‘hard crowd’ - it used to be easier to make him laugh but now it’s more difficult to raise a smile.

Breastfeeding and nappies remain the same, all fine. Sleep is the same if not a little bit better. He might be transitioning from five naps to four - not enough days to tell just yet! Eye contact etc is the same. No concerns with hearing or vision, fingers crossed.

He just seems less happy/perky, especially compared to the other babies in our antenatal group.

Hopeful bump

Hi OP, is there any chance he could be teething? Or maybe going through a growth spurt? Both things could just be making him a little bit grumpier than normal, it could be as simple as that.

I’m not sure about what is “normal”, if there is such a thing as I know all babies are so different but my daughter is 9 months old now and I don’t remember any chances to her behaviour in the way you describe. She was quite grumpy over the weeks when she had teeth coming through and once they did come through was back to normal again, and she has had grumpy days when she’s been a bit under the weather or having a growth spurt/learning a new skill so frustrated, but a general change I haven’t noticed no.

Thanks for your reply, I have looked at his gums and they don’t seem to be any different but I guess the teeth could be moving underneath?

Probably teething, keep having a feel to see if his gums are getting harder or bumpy. Bottom front two are usually the first to come through at 5-7 months.

I've always assumed they go through phases and he's currently working on some developmental milestone that we can't always see... the babbling will come back I'm sure. It's always a phase.

This afternoon he was terribly, awfully distressed. Huge cries and sobs, I thought he would be sick from the crying.

After multiple loose poos yesterday, today he hasn’t pooed at all. He has however been very sick, lots of possessing and we’re currently on the third sleepsuit of the evening! He was sicking up a lot too last week.

We have tried a Calpol and some teething powder but I’m really feeling at a loss.

Hi, did he improve? Going through this with my 4.5 month old xx

Oh absolutely. He’s 7 months now and much happier on a daily basis, although don’t get me wrong he can still have his moments! But he is lovely and curious and has beautiful smiles 😊 His first tooth came through about five weeks after I posted although I do think he was in pain with them moving under the gums for a while. I think as a PP said, he was just going through a developmental phase for a couple of weeks.

It’s hard when you’re in the thick of it, that afternoon of the 27th Jan was awful I remember it like it was yesterday! But things are much better now. This too shall pass @TinkerTinkerbelle 😊

I’ll also say that it was about January time that I realised that I was comparing myself and my baby to other mums I know, and that actually you really shouldn’t do that! Because a lot of the time, other people can be ‘competitive mumming,’ or simply not even telling the truth about how hard things are. I was holding myself up to a fake ideal and I was sure that I was doing something wrong or that something was wrong with my baby. When in fact, each baby is an individual, with their own preferences and needs, and there’s no such thing as ‘wrong.’ I regret not being kinder to myself in those early days.

Also - he’s still a contact napper and a co-sleeper. I tried to put him down for a nap in his cot earlier today and, for the umpteenth time, it failed as he he woke on transfer 😅

But, there was a point where he did finally accept being on the floor to play, and he enjoyed being in a bouncer when I was showering. We also got a high chair with a newborn insert which was great. So; things do slowly get better. I’m sure one day he’ll even sleep out of my arms! 😂

Thanks for the reply. My little girl is the same with contact naps and co sleeping. BF so will only fall asleep with a boob in her mouth. I don’t even bother trying to put her in her crib now because I know she’ll just get inconsolable. Usually wakes up crying.

You’re right about not comparing them but it’s so hard. I just thought all babies were hard and cried all the time until I went to baby sensory class and saw all the other babies chilling sat on their mums knee or laid on the floor. They were all smiling and giggling away!!! That was eye opening., Mine screams through the whole thing, will only sit on my knee happily for a minute and refuses to lay on the floor. She doesn’t do chilled out. I have to stand up and dance with her and always feed her half way though to keep her happy. We stick out like a sore thumb and I get a few pitying looks due to my screaming baby. I’ve walked home in tears from there before. 2 months of going and she’s only got slightly better - will now join in the odd bit before getting annoyed. But we still try because I don’t want her just to be stuck home with me.

She’s always been a grumpy baby though. Cries a lot. Hard to make smile and giggles are few and far between. She’s a tough crowd. So im worried it’s not just a phase with her. I’m on my own too - single mum so it’s hard work 24/7. I just try my best one day at a time and hold out hope for improvements at 6 or 7 months when she can start to do more. As she definitely does get frustrated. Lots and lots of furious shouting at toys, trying to roll, tummy time etc. always quickly escalates to a furious baby because she can’t do what she is trying to do.

i love hearing stories of others who had similar babies and it got better! Thank you x