Is this reflux / silent reflux??? Every day is hell

[SleepDeprived3103]

Hi all,

I posted on here a week or so ago regarding DS2’s sleep and had some lovely responses. As time has gone on though I’m wondering if something else is a miss to cause him such restless nights (he basically just doesn’t sleep - ever) and have been looking at some previous threads re silent reflux and wondering if this could be the root cause of some of his problems.

His symptoms being:

• Congested nose and very sneezy, since birth, sneezes a lot during feeds and has milk come out his nose
• Hiccups daily, often taking quite a while to clear
• Grunts, squirms, cries, strains and slams legs against cot mattress at night
• Possets after / during every feed even when burped - not sure how much is a normal amount? It seems quite a lot and we’re having to change his / our outfits regularly and car seat etc completely stained. It’s not exactly projectile but definitely feels like a lot. It smells pretty bad too but is that normal?
• Simply hates being put down and will not sleep lying down - rarely falls asleep in the pram, if he does it’s for 5/10 mins max. All naps have to be in the carrier/contact nap or sometimes car seat
• Will be in a deep sleep in my arms but wake screeching grunting and crying as soon as I transfer him. He goes straight back to sleep and quietens in my arms
• Cries hysterically if you take him away from boob / bottle to burp him
• Catnaps constantly, never sleeps longer than 30-40 mins even on his (havent even attempted the crib for naps)
• Dropped a centile initially on weight - he’s already had a case of viral meningitis so we put this down to that initially
• Constantly coughing

To help with sleep I tried co sleeping as I did with DS1 but our mattress has become quite soft and I found him rolled onto his front and now completely freaked out about doing it again. Financially we’re not in a position to be buying a new mattress for the sake of a couple of months and to see if co sleeping will even work.

He usually brings up 1-2 burps per feed and I hold him upright for 20-30 mins after feeding (90% of the time he falls asleep). I have also had our latch checked a few times at the breastfeeding clinic.

During the day he is very happy kicking about on his playmat or changing mat and is lovely and smiley but just seems so unsettled and uncomfortable at night. If I do get him to sleep in the crib, he wakes within 20-30 mins seemingly uncomfortable and it is absolutely killing me. I feel completely broken and my relationship is at breaking point as we’re both knackered. Plus I feel awful if he’s having an awful experience. He will only settle at night on the boob so we go round and round in this cycle whole night. He has been ebf up until a few days ago, when we’ve introduced a few bottles of formula (Kendamjl organic) as DP is obsessed with the idea that baby is hungry and breastfeeding is the root of all problems (heavily influenced by my MIL - but that’s a story for another day).

I’ve read about infant gaviscon working wonders but that it can cause constipation. I’d love to hear about others experiences, if the above sounds familiar or am I just imagining it? Is this normal baby behaviour? I feel quite dismissed by our HV and am just told he’ll grow out of it with no real help or practical advice.

he’s miserable, we’re miserable and I just don’t know what to do any more!!

Thank you so much x

My little one had silent reflux but not all the symptoms you describe. She was just almost always crying and grunting and slamming legs.
No idea if yours has the same or not, sounds like something else might be going on or a more extreme case. The coughing in particular.. maybe he still has some sort of infection?

If i were you (and i wish I could turn back time and do this sooner for mine) i'd pay for a private paediatrician and get your baby checked out properly. It's a few hundred quid-not cheap, but worth it. I'd suggest GP, but ours was useless and they initially want to "try" things (like do this one random thing and wait 1-2 weeks to see if it gets better). Sounds like your don't have time to waste.

Wishing you strengh and luck. I remember this time, for us too the first few months were hell on earth 😔 doesn't help you now but know it does (slowly) get better

Sounds like reflux, yes, but also potentially allergies. One for the GP - omeprazole and Gaviscon can be helpful.

Infant gavisvon on a half dose with a laxative every other day worked for one of mine with very similar issues. Tongue tie was the culprit for taking in too my much air during feeds. Get that checked asap.

Sounds like my daughter and it was caused by multiple food allergies and silent reflux.
We were on and off gaviscon from 6 to 18 weeks trying to find a dose that helped but didn't cause constipation and failed. At 17 weeks she was put on the highest dose of omperazole and I went dairy and soya free which improved things a lot but she still needed a thickener so at 18 weeks we accepted lactulose on prescription too. We had a different baby. Ultimately we needed domperidone too as her reflux is tricky to treat. She's 4 and still on this combination but since about 8 months she hasn't needed the lactulose

It’s likely cows’ milk protein allergy. Take advice from the GP and don’t change to soya (most milk allergic kids also allergic to soya). Can you drop the dairy and fully BF? By far the best option if you can.

If you remove dairy from your diet it’ll take a few weeks to leave your system but may sort it.

Was he given antibiotics for the meningitis? If so it will have wrecked his gut flora and I’d give him baby probiotic drops rather than gaviscon. I had a horrendously milk allergic baby and none of the medicine worked. It was diet and time for the gut to heal.

Are you feeding on demand in the day or to a schedule? Up the daytime breastfeeding if there are weight concerns but if it’s allergies the formula will be making it worse (ignore MIL!)

How old is he? I don’t think you say.

Thanks everyone for taking the time to read and reply, I really appreciate it.

@BananaPeanutToast sorry I should have said, he’s nine weeks. This all started around six weeks. Previously he’d been sleeping 3/4 hours at the start of the night then 1.5-2 after that.

He did have antibiotics and we were recommended to give him a probiotic - the name escapes me but we’re using the one in a pink box if that sounds or looks familiar.

I am feeding on demand - as much as I can while running round after a very active 2 y/onat least - as much as I’d love to be in a routine we’re still just feeding and cat napping on the go pretty much as and when required. To be honest I feel like giving up at this point as I’m so exhausted - I’m not exaggerating when I say he just doesn’t sleep anywhere but on me. I’m surviving on less than three hours sleep for the last 36 hours. But if there are allergies I know breast feeding will be easier and they say to never give up on a bad day. I spoke with our HV today who simply said it’s very normal to expect babies to want to sleep in mums arms and to ask for help where I can. My mum is very supportive and has given up lots of time to hold him while I nap already but it’s unrealistic to expect her to do so every day for the next six months… I just felt completely dismissed and that they were trying to minimise the severity of how this feels.it also doesn’t address the problem or the fact my baby is seemingly in pain.

@5475878237NC we have been told he has a very slight tongue tie when we first brought him home from the hospital - but multiple midwives looked at it and said it was very minor and wouldn’t affect feeding. I don’t know too much about tongue tie as it wasn’t ever an issue with DS1. Even if it’s minor do you think I should get this looked at?

@Superscientist it sounds like you and your little one have really been through it. I guess the lesson for me here is to be patient and expect to try a few different variations out if it is reflux / silent reflux. I’m really glad you found what worked for you ❤️

@kisaki333 thats a good idea - I do get private health insurance with AXA through my work which covers my children - so I’ll look into this pronto to see if paeds is covered.

we were prescribed infant gaviscon today so I know there are lots of mixed opinions about it - but I’m hopeful we may see positive changes soon, the dr said to expect at least a week.

Get a proper lactation consultant to check tongue tie. Midwives often seem to bluff and say it's fine and it turns out it's not.

It sounds like cmpa. I'd recommend the Facebook group for cmpa breastfeeding.

Even the slightest tongue tie has the potential to cause early end to breastfeeding because of pain for mum, reflux/silent reflux and/or weight gain issues. Get it assessed ASAP. Most midwives and HV have had one hour training on breastfeeding max and know hardly anything!

DS was like this, turned out to be milk allegory

I think at that age a cough, particularly if it is constant, is something that you should specifically mention to the GP/ the paeds consultant. My son had respiratory issues as a young baby and I did learn that at the time. Hopefully you will get some answers and an improvement soon. Take care.

All of this except sick, weight loss and cough is just like our CMPA baby was. Who then slept like a dream once I cut out milk and soya, but we didn't work that out for ages. Before we worked it out, Infacol, baths and dummy helped. (dummy after feeding to permit sucking to soothe digestive pain without restarting the feed-> cry cycle). Good luck.

All of the symptoms you describe I had with my DD except for the coughing, she had silent reflux and infant gaviscon was a life saver for us! She literally didn't sleep at all unless held for the first 6 weeks and once on Gaviscon, she'd sleep for 6 hours in a next to me which was tilted to help with the reflux. A dummy definitely helped too, good luck OP, sleep deprivation is the absolute worst! xx

Hello everyone, thanks so much for your replies I really appreciate it.

after a few days of giving gaviscon he seemed horrendously constipated - night two resulted in hours of middle of the night screeching until he finally got a poo out around 6am and instantly calmed. I know we should probably stick with it for the reflux but the constipation almost seemed like more pain! I was going to go back and ask to try omeprazole instead. I’ve read lots of good things but know it’s quite a strong drug.

We were moving to a combi feeding model, mainly as I was absolutely knackered and needed some help from my partner but i read that breast milk is easier to digest so I went back to ebf after a couple of days which seems to have improved.

i started co sleeping which is also marginally better at night - he doesn’t slam around so much as he did in the next to me crib and he’ll go for maybe 2 hours at the start of the night lying beside me (the rest of the night is a total write off however!)

the HV came to weigh him yesterday as they’ve been worrying about his weight but he’s been tracking between the second and ninth centile for a while now and she said she was no longer concerned and has concluded he’s just a small baby. However she did say all the above just sounds like a normal baby and made me feel I’m being paranoid or creating a problem out of nothing.

i guess with the slight improvement in sleep and weight gain and the health visitors comments I’m just thinking out loud to ask whether it is reflux…and how much sick is normal…we’re soaking through 3/4 outfits a day which seems a lot, still not getting long stretches of sleep unless upright, dealing with hiccups, stuffy nose etc as before.

ill definitely give the omeprazole a try but I feel like I’m just going round in circles!

Yes that's a lot of reflux. Omperazole is a perfectly safe drug to be given to babies. My daughter has been on it since 8 weeks and she's now 4. It can make things worse for the first few weeks as the body fights the meds and increases acid to counter the meds trying to reduce it. My daughter had to be on the highest dose for it to be effective. Or if you are happy that the gaviscon helped you could ask for lactulose alongside it. It's a gentle stool softener. I wish I had asked for it earlier than I did we had 3 months on and off gaviscon because of constipation. High dose omperazole, gaviscon and lactulose made a huge difference to my daughters

Yeah, I agree with every word of this. Waking all through the night like that even when co-sleeping isn’t normal. That isn’t a normal amount of reflux either. HV (and other professionals) are renowned for dismissing the concerns about this kind of stuff. There are meds which work and it will make all your lives better.

Please also keep an eye on the snuffly /coughing after feeding. If that doesn’t improve as DC grows then go to the GP about that as there are various reasons and it can be something that needs a bit of looking at.