9 year old makes an mmm noise when eating

[TulipVictory]

Our 9 year old daughter makes an "mmm" almost like satisfied sound when she's eating her dinner. She does this repeatedly as she's eating. It's only started in the last few months. We only just brought it up with her yesterday and she's adamant she's not making any noises so she obviously isn't even aware she's doing it. Does anyone know what this could be? Thanks

Is there anything for her to be anxious about in your lives?

@DustyLee123 yes she is often anxious about something. It is normally to do with cleanliness, catching a sick bug (she gets very worried about vomiting) and also bowel movements. A few nights a week she will scream, shout and get angry on the toilet because it's taking too long to wipe. She has had very bad tantrums from a young age and can go from 0 to very angry very quickly over very small things. She gets so angry she screams, shouts and it takes her a very long time to calm down or even forget the situation. She is different to her siblings, I know that but I don't know what exactly. She's also very righteous in the sense that everything has to be black and white, if her siblings are wrong she will tell them so and tell everyone she knows that they aren't doing something right. There's a lot more I could write really but a lot of the time she is lovely. Her teachers wouldn't know about these outbursts at all, she only does them at home. I think they would be shocked.

That would drive me bonkers! If she’s not aware that she’s doing it then you need to correct her every time that you hear it

Is she on TikTok or any other social media? According to DD there are a few influencers who solely post videos of them eating food loudly for views. Could she have subconsciously learnt it from that?

I think reading into it being anxiety related is a bit much to be honest.

Best ignored - pointing out a tic or habit just makes the child anxious about it. It will go in its own good time.

This sounds like a ND dc and the mmmmm noise is a form of stimming.

Anxious
OCD
black and white thinking
meltdowns
Angel at school tantrums at home.

l could go on. I have one.

I mean surely you're thinking ASD?

I thought stimming as well.

And I hadn’t even read the OP’s next post about tantrums and black and white thinking then either!

Sounds like autism to me, as the parent of 2 autistic kids. The noise sounds like stimming. And all the other behaviours sound like autism.

I laughed when I saw this because my dc, at around 7yo, used to make a similar noise when eating,

It was also a "mmmm" sound, but more like humming, rather than a "this food is yummy" way.

My dc was amused when we used to point it out and said they weren't aware they were doing it.

My advice is to ignore it and let them be. Sooner or later, it stops.

That would drive me bonkers! If she’s not aware that she’s doing it then you need to correct her every time that you hear it

This is terrible advice. Don’t do this. If she’s unaware she’s doing it, then it’s probably an involuntary tic, and pointing it out will a) make her self-conscious and upset and b) make it worse. And if she’s doing it to wind you up, then making a big fuss about it is exactly the wrong reaction.

Ignore it. Never mention it again.

It sounds like a tic, DD has a lot of them (probably tourettes), if it is then ignoring is the only way to handle it. Most tics don't last that long but pointing them out makes them a lot worse.

Being autistic myself sounds classic

Mine had a period when cleared her throat all the time - we gently pointed out she should try to stop. Which she did. So it could be a tic like this which come and go at this age. Or it might be more ... time will tell

my child has started doing this 'mmm mmm' all the time at home. It started a couple of months and he has been hurt a lot by children with challenging behaviours in his reception class. I'm thinking it's due to the anxiety he now has :( . He says he holds it in at school!

My dd does this, she is diagnosed with Autism, she does it less now she’s older but it used to drive me nuts 😬.

I was going to say this too
My eldest does this noise and he's autistic and 21. He doesn't know he does it either.

I did this as a child. I have an autistic dd. DH reckons I'm autistic too.

Sorry I'm probably going to ask some silly questions but I have long suspected she may have some sort of ASD.

What is stimming?

Will these absolute meltdowns/tantrums ever get better?

What can I do to help her?

My son who is 9 also makes similar noises when eating. He doesn’t realise he is doing it as I will ask him to stop and he looks confused. I have been worried his friends might be mean at school to him for doing it but he said no one has mentioned it to him. Maybe I’ll try just ignoring it from now on like others have suggested.

Stimming is something they do to self regulate, it can be as extreme as jumping up and down, running or arm flapping or it can be something as shuttle as a small sound. My daughter has lots of stims including hand flapping, hummming when she eats and throat clearing, she also does a weird thing where she makes a circle with her fingers and hold it to her eye. Some stims last a few weeks, others last months/years.

Meltowns get better when you understand the triggers and can avoid them or distract from them. It’s not easy, it’s more about learning to understand the causes and what works to make them shorter when they do happen. My dd is almost 18, most of the time I can predict what will cause a meltdown and avoid it or distract but sometimes that’s not possible. Biggest issue for us is being in a shop, dd wanting something and me having to guess what she wants (she doesn’t like asking so just gets upset when I try and leave the shop) and then telling her she can’t have something. Sometimes I have to offer her something more exciting to get her out the shop quietly 😬

For my dd ‘planning/scheduling’ helps her, she doesn’t like surprises, she likes to know what’s happening for the day/week and likes to stick too routines, same with school/college.

This thread has made me feel very odd because I used to do this as a child, it would embarrass my parents in company, but I couldn’t control it. I used to do many stimming things, like skin picking and sniffing my hands.

I am diagnosed ADHD but have wondered for a while if I’m autistic and can just mask better as an adult, which might explain (a) why life was so hard when I was young and (b) why I’m so knackered all the time

By the way, what I really remember from this part of my life is my parents just shouting at me to stop. Stop humming, stop sniffing, stop picking. Absolutely did not work, just made me feel ashamed.

Same. I was a chewer (clothes, pencils, fingers), a hair twirler, foot tapper. Got told to sit still and got shouted at for chewing my clothes. I’m waiting for ADHD assessment and I suspect I have ASD also, 2 dc both diagnosed ASD. Growing up was hard being constantly moaned at for not being normal.

Definitely sounds like she autistic. I have and Asd son with a lot of similar traits. He’s an angel at school. At home it can be very different. He’s hugely anxious, has meltdowns, stims and has tics on and off. Please don’t point out the stims/tics. My son makes so many different noises, he is constantly making sounds, often irritating ones but over the years I’ve just got used to it. He’s an absolute delight with so many struggles, he can’t help it.
maybe speak to your doctor for a paediatrician referral.