10 year old soiling himself

[Juliesdagger]

My son has been toilet trained for years. For the last 6 months or
so I’ve noticed he’s had some poo marks in his underwear most evenings - nothing I was overly concerned about, I put it down to lazy wiping and just made sure he was freshly washed daily and new pants on in morning etc. But lately it’s been more than a smear- I’ve thrown 2 pairs away this week because there was an actual poo in them, or enough of one I just put them straight in the bin. He often has to use wipes at
the end of the day too to clean himself so I’m now worried. He’s defensive when I ask him about it and simply says he doesn’t even know it’s happened - my guess is that it happens when he’s gaming and absorbed for
a few hours in the evening as he’s clean when he gets home from school. He drinks well so is hydrated and goes for
a bowel movement daily so I don’t he is constipated but something is going on. He’s also very emotionally Labile, easily angry and upset so I’m concerned. I will make a gp appt but frankly dreading it as he’s embarrassed with just me raising it so a Gp hearing he soils himself will be excruciating. Does anyone have any experience of this? Thank you

Am sorry you and more importantly your son are going this. No advice but GP appt is definitely the way to go. He might be more open with a stranger than his mum.

The Eric website is really helpful and will lead you to further info. The condition is called Encopresis. It's more common than many realise.
Home - ERIC

Not sure if this the same thing but my 6 yo had a similar problem that lasted a couple of months over last summer. It followed a tummy bug and it took him ages to get back to normal. Doctor wasn’t concerned at all. Suggested secondary lactose intolerance as it came on after a bug so we cut out dairy for several weeks. It only ever happened in the evening. The GP said this was because that’s when his bowels are active as he’s always been one to go for a poo in the evening. So he’d have a poo and a shower and put clean pjs on then we’d check them before bed and often there’d be something there to clean up and change pjs.
it was never whole poos or anything. But obvious smears and occasional little bits of actual poo. Biggest one was maybe 5p size but most often was just smears. He always said he didn’t feel it happen.
It stopped by itself - took a couple of months though.

From how you've described, i would reduce gaming (few hours every evening is a lot!) and take it from there

Just because he goes once a day doesn't mean he isn't still constipated. Try upping his fruit and liquids, reduce anything that requires very focused concentration, eg gaming. Go back to basics and send him to the toilet when he gets in after school, then before gaming, etc.

You can feel very out of sorts when constipated.

I agree with this. Sounds like he might be in a rush to return to his game so does a lack lustre job of wiping.