Panicked it's autism

[35and3]

For context, I have a severely autistic brother and I'm an EYFS teacher so see a lot of asd every day. Yet now my worry is so close to home I'm not being very rational.

My son is 23 months (he's my third but only ds) and I feel he's showing some telltale signs.

1. He's obsessed with dinosaurs.
2. He counts everything.
3. He puts his toys into colour groups.
4. He's quite a fussy eater.
5. Wants to watch the same programmes over and over.

Now I know some of this could be normal toddlerdom but I've got a gut feeling something isn't right.

Otherwise, he's a good talker (except at nursery. He'll play but rarely speak there), good sleeper, loves to play. He walked from 13 miles - just saying this to show he's met milestones along the way.

Any advice or calming techniques?

13 months!!!

Will also add that he can count to 20 and read numbers to 10. He can also read most capital letter names.

He is what he is so I'd just enjoy him and try not to worry. My eldest wasn't diagnosed until his early 20s. He had similar interests to your son but aside from "being shy" he managed fine. It's only his social anxiety now that he needs to make his way as an adult that prompted his diagnosis, simply so that he can get any support that he needs for work etc.

He's still him, funny, clever, kind etc

I'm sorry that you feel panicked that your child might be neurodiverse.

I have two wonderful autistic teenagers.

If he is autistic it seems he can count and read at a very young age so it hasn't affected his intellect.

I would enjoy him and bring it up with a health visitor to see if they agree, they may agree to have him assessed in due course but 15 months is very very young.

So many children are autistic. It’s fine.

I know you're worried but the title of your post is a bit upsetting for those of us with an autistic child. My little boy has been diagnosed as autistic and he has his challenges but he's also very affectionate and a happy little child.

Your son sounds very bright - focus on the positives. Your health visitor or gp can give advice and refer you into the nhs system for diagnosis if needs be.

Apologies, no offence caused whatsoever. As per my op, my brother is several autistic and so I've witnessed the difficulties my parents have had and continue to face even though he's 34 now. Just one worried mum.

He actually has a paediatrician for a medical condition so I will raise it directly with them.

I'm autistic. My child is autistic. At least 50% of my extended family show strong traits of ASD or ADHD or both about half of whom have a diagnosis.

Your family mat be similar. These things are genetic. The only issue here is your "panic". Your child is a wonderful and unique human being. This will be true whether or not he has autism. Maybe you should get some counselling to process your "panic" and learn to accept people for who they are. We aren't subhuman or faulty. Culture has historically prioritised the needs and skills of neurotypical people which creates problems for neurodiverse people. As that changes, it is getting easier to function in the world as a neurodiverse person. Understanding eachother is key.

I think the biggest asd sign is limited speech. So thats less of a worry.
My dd was similar and actually is on asd pathway.
But loads of kids like dinosaurs and to count etc

I think you need to ignore the fact that your brother is autistic. Your child, autistic or not, is an individual and should be treated as such.

Autism is different in every person, so you cannot compare to your brother.

My DD was similar at 2, liked to organise her toys, particular about food, fussy about textures of clothes, struggled a bit socially at nursery but early talker.

At 6 she is clearly neurospicy but settled and happy at school, though found reception hard with the free flow and adjusting to noisy environment etc. She thrived in year 1 when things were a bit more structured and has a SEN plan to help her thrive but doesn’t need an EHCP. The county specialist teacher has recommended that we get her assessed and we will as it may get more challenging for her as she gets older but mostly she’s a bright sparky kid. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing.