Glue ear and behaviour

[lollydu]

I'm just looking for some advice really and experiences from mums who have experience of children with glue ear?

My DD who is 4 has had ENT problems all her life and is finally having tonsils and adenoids out and possibly grommets in January. She has always been a very spirited, headstrong, child. A real handful and often has me in tears. This week she has had another ear infection and the dr said she could see the fluid behind her ear drum bulging so the glue ear is pretty bad at the moment, and her behaviour is honestly something else! She has been hideous and it seems to correspond with the ear issues. I'm not silly and I know it is just her personality and the operation is probably not going to improve things much but I guess a small part of me hopes that sorting out her ear issues might have a positive effect on her behaviour? Does anyone else have experience of this? Examples of her behaviour are just not doing as she is asked if she simply doesn't want to do it, no matter how it is asked, no respect for us as parents, if we ask her to do something she doesn't want to do she gets physical and lashes out at us. I have asked school and they say she is well behaved there so she saves it all up for us at home. She is often full of remorse afterwards when she has calmed down and understands why her behaviour is wrong.

I guess I am just very hopeful that sorting her ears out will have positive effects on her temperament.

Hello
my experience is difference as my little girl is only 19 months, but when she was diagnosed with glue ear we also saw changes in her behaviour.
nursery called me as they were concerned as she’d started biting other children
atm her ears seem to be ok 🤞🏼 and we’re monitoring behaviour. It does sound to me like the glue ear could be the problem tho and she may be getting very frustrated and then lashing out.
hope the surgery does help things for you x

She is in pain and probably cannot hear very well so yes it will have a huge impact on her, it is also making her tired. Both ds had this operation done aged 4 and life improved massively for them health wise and also just being happier. Honestly she will be so much better once she has it all done.

My ds had recurring ear infections. I could always tell when one was starting because his behaviour was awful.

Glue ear causes discomfort, pressure, hearing loss, broken sleep, it absolutely effects their behaviour. My ds had it along with swollen low grade infected adenoids and he was deemed to be “high needs, clingy, bold”, when he was really exhausted and constantly agitated.

Thank you everyone for your thoughts - I remain hopeful then that life will improve for all of us when she has her op! I will report back xx

@lollydu could I ask for an update on your situation as we are currently in the same boat. Thanks

Well she had tonsils out and adenoids in January 2024 - the spec said grommets weren't necessary at that time but since Jan she has had 3 more ear infections so she's now set for grommets in May. I'll update further then. Tonsils and adenoids did nothing for her behaviour we are still struggling xx

My dd was very similar and was diagnosed with glue ear. She had grommets in and adenoids out when she was 3.5. I think there was some improvement in behaviour and sleep. However, she has continued to struggle slightly with the same things eg loud busy places, being emotional, etc - all quite subtle compared to when she was a toddler/preschooler - but at 10 she is now being referred for ASD/ADHD assessment. Just mentioning as I wish I'd kept more notes when she was younger instead of accepting it was down to glue ear. I'm still not sure which way it will go.

Thank you wtftodo - I am in the middle of an adult ADHD diagnosis so I remain hopeful for some positive effects of resolving the glue ear but also realistic that it probably won't change the fundamental challenging aspects of her personality!x