Headaches in 4YO.. should I be concerned or just anxious?

[piglingwiggle]

Since December DD (now just turned 4) has complained of headaches maybe a couple of times a week. They were fleeting. I.e 'Urgh I have a headache' 2 mins later.. 'oh it's gone now'. Worth noting that in May she did not once complain of these headaches & I thought the phase of her saying it was over. However she started up saying it again in June, maybe once a week. Again, fleeting, never needing Calpol or stopping her doing whatever she's doing at the time.

She's not been well this week, high temp, some sort of bug. Still eating & drinking mostly however. Horrid viral rash. Not had a temp for over 24 hours now.

2/3 days ago when her fever was having to be controlled by meds, she said she had a headache about 3 times that day. But again nothing really came of it. Put it down to the illness.

Today in the last couple hours (we had been out all day prior to this and all ok) she told me she had a headache then started crying & saying it hurt & holding her forehead. I've given her Calpol, she's eaten some dinner & now having a little ice cream for afters.

She has a paediatrician for an unrelated issue, we saw her back in April & told her about the headaches then. She wasn't concerned as they were so fleeting & also no vomiting etc with them. DD also had an eye test yesterday with better vision than most her age according to the Optician. Pics of back of the eye all fine.

My health anxiety has truly kicked in & I just feel
Like the only way I can be at ease that there's (hopefully) nothing going on is to ask if DD can have an MRI. DP not happy with this idea, he thinks she's fine & doesn't want to put her through the stress/sedation of an MRI even if we were granted one. I just feel this has been going on for 6 months relatively.

I just don't really know what to do? I'm full of anxiety as about to give birth to DD2 any day now. I've just never ever known her cry over a headache. It really startled me. Am I being OTT, should I just monitor or get back in touch with paediatrician?

On the whole, headaches for truly scary reasons in children (ie brain tumours) happen when there is significant pressure on the brain. This tends to mean symptoms that are pretty much continuous, evolving and worsening, usually over a relatively short period of time. Though understandably frustrating how long it's gone on for, you can in some ways see this as a positive in that respect, especially if you've been seen by a trained healthcare professional in that time. The symptoms actually sound quite infrequent so not a direct burden on your child.

@Unseenentity Thank you for your rational comment. I suppose I'm just a bit shocked by her getting upset over a headache & actually requiring Calpol, this has never happened before. As I say, usually just very fleeting.

Has she had her eyes tested? It would be good to rule out eye strain.

My 3yo says he has then whenever he has a cold and I can only assume it's pressure/ sinuses.

Like your dd, his are fleeting; mentioned once and then forgotten about.

I did get his eyes checked, just to be sure, and they looked at the back of his eyes when I mentioned headaches.

Hi @piglingwiggle, I have been / am in your shoes many, many times. Firstly, your DD has no other red flags - this is a good sign! I reckon my DD was saying it because she got into the habit of it, but also she was having headaches because, unknown to me at the time, she had undiagnosed coeliac disease so that was another reason.

I was / am so paranoid that every headache is a brain tumour, and it really sets off my anxiety. She is under a consultant for her coeliac and I’ve mentioned the headaches and she said so long as they aren’t worsening day by day / making her sick / giving her double vision / change in personality or becoming clumsy, then not to worry.

I hope you’re ok and I can totally relate to you. What I find helpful is recording in a diary the times DD has a headache and seeing if there is a pattern - was it hot and she was dehydrated? Did she have a virus?

Wishing you all the best on your new arrival xx

My DD actually needs an mri to measure how much of her small intestine is inflamed or strictured as a result of her Crohn's. She was diagnosed in October 2021 and we have an appointment for her MRI, finally, at the end of this month. 22 month wait for a genuinely medically indicated MRI.

I will leave you with that, OP.

@pineapple360 Yes, eyes tested only yesterday.

Is she drinking enough water, and at regular intervals? Good to have her eyes checked.

How does she have her hair styled? Is it always the same? I get a splitting headache if I wear my hair in a tight ponytail for too long.

I agree with trying to look for patterns, eg after being in the car, always on PE days etc.

@Alloveragain3 Thank you for your reply. She has had a horrid temp/virus which started up on Wednesday. As I say she last had a temp with it over 24 hours ago but has a viral rash, so something in her system still. Wondering if that could be the cause. She's just never got upset with a headache, that has unsettled me.

Hi @Jabbitt thanks so much for your lovely message. How often does your DD get headaches? Does she ever get upset by them?

You're quite right about the absence of other red flags, I do look at the Head Smart site & try to reassure myself. I just feel on the edge constantly. And say she was actually sick but then complained of a headache, rather than think 'it's likely a sick bug & she has a headache also' I would think 'she's vomiting & has a headache - red flag', does that make sense? Aware my anxiety is a lot to do with this but also not wanting to ignore actual symptoms either.

Xxx

@MumofCrohnie Totally get it. Advantage (I say advantage, it's not for a nice reason) but totally unrelated, is that she is under the care of a Paediatrician so we are already in that 'system'. Paed is actually very good & said happy to do MRI if it brings me peace but I don't want to put DD through it unless I feel really necessary, otherwise I'm just passing on my health anxiety to her effectively

@piglingwiggle yes, DD (who started getting headaches around 3 years old, so very young!) would say “my head feels ouchie” and sometimes cry. It was awful. Honestly, I remember one Christmas DH was poorly and DD ran in sobbing “I have what daddy has! My head really hurts!” I was terrified. DH’s cousin is a GP and I messaged her and she said it was likely a combination of too much sugar / late nights and possibly coming down with a bug.

DD got to a stage where she would say “do you want to hear about my pains” when I was putting her down at night, and I was suffering so badly with panic attacks because of the worry. It’s so hard to not pass my anxiety on to her, so I would just say “what about we talk about the good things today” so it would distract her.

Now DD is older (nearly 8) she can articulate a lot better about where the pain is / if it’s particularly bad. The paediatrician said that she has simple headaches and will get them when she’s tired / unwell and to give Calpol if she needs it xx

@Jabbitt Totally identify with the anxiety you're describing it's just horrid. Did they do any tests to diagnose your DD or just going on the fact she had no other symptoms come to the conclusion they did? Xx

@piglingwiggle with diagnosing the headaches they didn’t do any imaging, but they did a full neurological check (getting them to touch their nose to the doctors finger, the clonus test and some other things), but she said girls do tend to experience more headaches than boys (I have a DS who is older than DD and he has had a handful of headaches compared to DDs 20-30+ headaches!).

DD will have a headache probably once every month at least, and every time I will write down exactly what she was doing before it happened - for me, it’s useful to see if there was a trigger. Usually, she will get a headache a few days before the symptoms of a cold appears, so I’m usually on tenterhooks for 3 days after a headache 🙈xx

Could she have Covid OP ? Horrible headaches with that are common.
The fleeting headaches may be completely unconnected to this one which has made her cry, this could be Covid or sinus related, sinus pain really hurts.

@SirVixofVixHall I wondered about Covid as I've heard it can cause headaches especially in children but she won't let me test her, if she had a cold it would be easier to just blow her nose & swab the snot (apologies for that lovely image) I may try tomorrow if she's still the same.

Of course you must get this checked out, but just wanted to come here and say that a severe migraine sufferer in my 40s, I've sadly suffered and been predisposed to bad headaches for as long as I can remember. Probably had them as a baby, a specialist told me. So it could be "just" these- awful for her but not life-threatening. Good luck.

@piglingwiggle sorry just re-reading your post again and DD was the same with having a bug / having a headache with it and then saying she had a headache a few days later because she still wasn’t 100%. Your DD sounds like the bug was still lingering and then did a bit too much today. My DD had covid last year and the headache was the worst she ever had (her only symptom) so now we use that to compare the pain of her”normal” headaches! I hope your DD feels better but I would say it’s a virus xx