4yo having a filling tomorrow

[KhaleesiOfChaos]

Please don't flame me as I feel like a bad mother as it is. I just need some advice.

4yo is having a filling tomorrow, top tooth right at the back. Even the dentist said he's not sure how he's going to do it.

Does anyone have any tips or advice on how to make this easier / less scary or less painful for my son?

Short of turning back time and making sure he's brushing his back teeth properly obviously.

Hopeful bump as the thread is already missing from homepage on the app...really could do with some advice!

Giving you a bump! No advice but hopefully someone will be along shortly. I hope it all goes well for you both, it's soooo hard to brush children's teeth. My 5yo still screams and protests every. Single. Time. We are awaiting SEN diagnosis of some kind so perhaps linked but my point is please don't be too hard on yourself.
Good luck with the tooth procedure x

Thank you @Heavymetaldetector - he genuinely doesn't eat much bad stuff. It's fruit and fighting to get the back teeth brushed at all.

Wish I was more strict about it but lesson learnt now.

I was wondering if calpol just before appointment might be a good idea? Hopefully someone will along to give some advice!

Dentist here. Ever single child and every single case is different, so it is hard to comment without knowing if there's an abscess, if it's a big cavity, a small cavity etc etc...
these wee people cope amazing well. And sometimes they don't.
As a parent, try to keep your cool, keep lighthearted and full of praise. Do g say " don't worry, it's not going to hurt" or "you won't feel a thing" as these type of phrases trigger something in the child's head.
"Wait... what? Hurt?"
So just stay quiet and encouraging and let the dentist take the lead.
A wee bribe always good, a sticker, a small favourite toy as a reward. ( not sweets however!)

If it doesn't work out, and at 4 years old the child might be pre-cooperate, don't get upset or appear distressed in front of child. Don't make a big deal of it. Worst thing you can do is add to the "bad experience ".
Ask about alternatives to a specialist paediatric referral service, possibly community based, where the dentists there have more time to spend on children, and maybe able to offering sedation etc ( laughing gas) as an adjunct, although that's not for everyone.
Also if the cavity is big, ask whether stainless steel ( Hall) crowns are an option to help preserve the teeth.
Ask about prevention to stop the situation getting worse, ask about fluoride varnish application, ask advice in toothbrushing and get as much info as you can. I'd also ask gif 3 month recalls rather than ) month so the dentist can keep a closer eye for awhile.

When I had a filling it wasn’t painful, just uncomfortable holding my mouth open for so long. It was a bit overwhelming with the loud noise and bright light and having the dentist so close to my face and calpol wouldn’t help with that.

I’d prep him well, talk him through what will happen and be honest that it might be sore and unpleasant. That way he’ll know what to expect and won’t be blindsided by every telling him it will be fine. I’m not sure if there are any children’s resources or YouTube videos which are useful and I’m sure the dentist will be able to do that before the filling as well.

Sorry. Hate that you can't edit posts. A few typos in there.
The last bit meant to read I would ask for 3 month recalls instead of 6

@toastofthetown
Dentist here again. Prep by all means but I disagree with the advice you've just given re it may be sore.
Op please don't do that. It only puts them on high alert.
Play it down. Say the dentist might tickle your tooth and you might feel some buzzing

I tend to find sometimes mentioning other kids who have had similar helps. If at all possible if you know anyone who has had one. Say it’s quite common and lots of kids often have to do it. So they know other kids have managed.

the other tip I once read on here is to tell them the needle is long so it reaches the right bit of your mouth. But only the very tip touches you. Cos the big scary long needle is a bit alarming. But I am not a dentist though so maybe dentists above could advise if this is good idea or not. It can be easy to say wrong thing can’t it !

An injection might not even be required. Generally if it's a small cavity in a deciduous tooth you can get away without anaesthesia. I wouldn't mention it. Or you could check with dentist in advance.
If an injection is required I would always be straight with a patient and explain things well ( in a child friendly manner).
I talk about the magic gel. Make sure the dentist uses magic gel. Then I say you'll feel a wee scratch.
I try and distract the child with lights, sunglasses, tooth fairy, music, whatever I can find lying around.

Would earphones be a good idea? To play music or a story so he can’t hear the drill?

How did it go today?