Constant illness - struggling to cope

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DD is 2 and a half and has been ill with something or other for over a year. Constant colds, chest infections, chicken pox, conjunctivitis, tonsillitis, ear infections . . . she's hospitalised twice, and been at home sick more than she's been at nursery. I started a new job a few months ago and I am so stressed out from trying to work around DD's illnesses. DH is struggling too, we share it equally, but it's having a hugely negative impact on both our jobs. We don't have any family or friends nearby who can help us when DD is ill.

I'm just at the end of my tether because DD has another bout of tonsillitis and a very bad cold - her eyes and nose are constantly streaming and she's sore from wiping; the antibiotics have given her terrible diarrhoea so we're changing her nappy every thirty minutes or so, and there is therefore zero chance of my having some time to catch up on all the work I neglected when she had chicken pox a couple of weeks ago.

I am exhausted. I can't bear to see her so miserable all the time. I'm honestly at the end of my rope.

There. Needed to get that out

Sorry you're having a hard time. It's expected when they first start nursery but not age 2.5. Have you spoken to your health visitor or GP?

Maybe their immune system needs a boost. You can buy special immune vitamins for babies in Boots, I saw them today whilst I was browsing.

Is there any way a family member can come and stay with you for a bit to help out? Or you go to them and work from their home if you wfh?

Hope things improve soon.

Hi @Jk987 - thank you for responding. I've spent so much money on immune-boosting vitamins and supplements, but nothing seems to be working so far.

As for someone to help out, I could ask my mum to fly over for a few days, but that's only practical as a one-off (or occasionally) and not for months on end, which is what's happening at the moment. It feels like DD recovers from something and is finally allowed back at nursery, and within a week she's sent home with something else. We only ever get a few days respite before her temperature shoots up again or she comes down with a virus or a cough or something . . .

I can usually solve problems and fix things. I'm efficient and practical. But this is defeating me (and DH). I pretty much burst into tears at the doc's the other day and he pretty much just said "that's kids for you . . . "

That sounds so tough on you. Constant illness is so difficult to handle.

Do you think maybe you could get a childminder in the home? To stop her being exposed to as many of the bugs in nursery? If financially possible at all?

We are coming out of the cold weather, so you'd hope it would come to an end soon, which is no real comfort to you when you're in the thick of it.

I know anecdotally, so many kids of that age have been constantly ill. Lockdowns definitely did a number on their immunity.

I never even thought of a childminder, @blue12345 - that may well be a possible solution. I hate the thought of her missing out on the full nursery experience (it's a brilliant nursery) but she's off so much anyway, she's not getting the full benefit.

It would probably need to be a nanny though, wouldn't it? A childminder would have other children, so the same principle would apply - she'd be excluded when she's ill. I'm not sure we can afford a nanny. But it's definitely something to consider, thank you.