Worried about my niece, should I intervene?

[HeidiGerman]

I'm not one to tell someone how to parent, so this is difficult for me, but I feel like I have little choice. My niece is 12 and I've noticed that she's been getting heavier and heavier and she's now noticeably much bigger than her friends. I've also noticed that my sister (her mother) doesn't feed her dinner until her partner gets in from work, which is often after 8PM, and usually it's pizza or a pot noodle on the menu. Because she's hungry while waiting for food, she's pigging out on sweets and treats between meals. I looked in the fridge and it's full of cheap microwave meals, which she heats up and eats. She's also pretty inactive, spending most of her time on video games, and she recently threw up with exhaustion on a pretty gentle walk. My sister often leaves her with a babysitter on a weekend while her and her partner go out, meaning that she's stuck indoors and not getting anywhere near the recommended amount of exercise for a child her age. And she just doesn't seem to have anywhere near the energy that I had as a child and I'm worried how this is affecting her health. She has already experienced stomach issues and regularly gets sick. Her mother and partner are very well off, so can afford healthier options, and have the time to make proper meals for her. And I nearly lost it recently when I saw them make a proper meal for themselves but just handed her a pot noodle. Am I overreacting or should I intervene? And if so, how?

You must be at their house a lot (or even live there) to know this level of detail. Have they suddenly changed her diet or have you only just noticed?

I'm there a lot. My niece also tells me and other family members have noticed it too. My sister has never fed her a varied diet. She loves junk food, so my niece is used to living off junk food too. In fact she won't even eat vegetables anymore because my sister doesn't.

Invite her out to do active things such as swimming and ice skating. Go out to healthy food places, eg salad bars, while you're there.

How do you feel about raising it with your sister? There isn't much to actually can do other than raise it with her and see what she says.

You can't be there to feed her. You can't make your sister feed her healthy foods.

You could try to educate your rice so she can learn about hrs luthier choices, but if the crap in the fridge is all she's go to choose from then it won't change either.

So focus on what you can do, which is talk. Tell your sister what you see. No opinions, no 'I think', just what you have told us.