How to get my 3yo to poo!?

[OnSilverStars]

My 3.5 year old won't poop. She holds it in for days. It's been a thing for about 6 months. I feel like we've tried everything. She says she just doesn't want to poop but doesn't know why. She says it doesn't hurt. She says she's not scared. After she finally does one- she says she's happy she has and won't hold it in next time. And it didn't hurt.

What we've tried:
Books. Lots of pooping books
You tube pooping videos.
Watching tv while on the potty.
Bribing. Treats.
Explaining why we poop and why it's important
Saying we'll have to go to the doctor.
Saying we're worried she'll get a tummy ache (which she now complains about occasionally)
Nothing. We've tried to just ignore it and be nonchalant but after 3 or so days it starts to become a big deal again

I really don't think there's a medical issue. I think she's convinced herself she doesn't like it and there's not changing her mind but it's driving me mad! And I am worried about her.

Any advice???

Also we're happy to put a pull up on her to go. We offer. Occasionally she does it after a lot of convincing but not usually

Have a look at the ERIC website and use their free help line.

Sit her on the toilet and blow bubbles. I was told that it relaxes the muscles needed to poo. It seems to work for my DD.

Put her feet on a stool too, it helps with the right posture and makes it easier.

Mine always did it in the bath. The warm water relaxes them

@Beamur

Put her feet on a stool too, it helps with the right posture and makes it easier.

Just popped back to say the same thing

I don't know if this is a thing anymore but when I was younger I was giving warm orange juice, it made it less hard so easier to push out so it didn't hurt.
I seemed to go not long after drinking it!

I have two DC. One that pois generally at least daily, and one that goes about twice a week. With the irregular pooer he doesn’t seem to be constipated, it’s a good consistency when he does go, and it just seems to be the way he’s made. He’s 5 now but it’s been at least a couple of years he’s been like this. There don’t seem to be any impaction issues, the poo is formed and a sensible size and shape. I’ve stopped worrying about it.

Not to say there isn’t an issue with your child, just that it can be normal for some children.

Chop up some prunes and put them in her breakfast cereal, porridge or offer them as a snack. She won’t be able to hold it in even if she wants to. Worked a treat with my son. Good luck.

How often do they actually go. I go maybe twice 3 times a week. I have always been this way. Its normal for me. Are you expecting them to go daily? They may not be constipated if they aren't straining, in pain or having leakage. I just don't feel the urge very often.

Do you think it's a physical issue I.e. constipation, or mental?

If it's mental then I would suggest poo goes to pooland. There's an app with the story and it really helped my DS want to go.

If constipation then dried figs.

Thanks everyone. I will definitely try these. Especially bubbles and pooland as I think it's mental... not at all physical

I'm guess I expect her to go every day or two. I go like 2-3 times a day but I guess I'm probably abnormal 🙈

I had this with my dd and ended up getting movocol from the Dr for her. I think they get into a cycle of holding it in, which then leads to the poo becoming hard and painful to pass so they hold it in...

A few sachets of movocol sorted my dd out as she couldn't hold it and once she got used to going regularly she was okay with it.