Suggestions for sports for DD12?

[Reservoir13]

Dear readers,

My 12-year old has had a difficult year with the different lock downs. She is currently playing tennis, but doesn't enjoy it. Her 10 year old sister is a quite advanced gymnast with several trainings per week. Clearly, my younger one has found 'her' sport and is excelling in it. It also matches her personality and body type as she is small, flexible and very active. Last night, my older one said she would also like to find a sport she is good at. She is already spending far too much time indoors and alone behind the screen so I would personally prefer an outdoor or team sport. We've tried soccer in the past but "the ball was too hard" . We've also tried judo but she "can never remember all the moves". Now she wants to try basketball but I'm hesitant as the ball is also quite hard there and she is quite small (well, to be honest, like her sister, she has always been the smallest of her year group). I presume that even in kids basketball length will become important soon. What other sports can you recommend? She is currently wearing insoles as the podiatrist says she has some hypermobility - it does seem to be limited to her feet/legs.
I think she has good ball control and is fast. Are we overlooking a sports? Would you have recommendations?

Rowing is a sport which kids don’t take up until early teens. Lots of people start at uni/ adulthood and become decent.

Cheerleading. The competitive sporty type not the cheering for a team type.

Roller derby

Joining a canoe/ kyack club?

Join a Bouldering club?

Ice hockey.
Curling.
Speed skating.
Badminton.

@reallyreallyborednow

And yes- elite sport can be an absolute nightmare. The politics are unbelievable, even at 11 and 12 years old, both at club and national squad level.

"Good" doesn't necessarily mean elite though, I'm assuing OP's DD means something she is good enough to be on a team for and maybe win a few prizes or matches, even if that's only on a local level, rather than she is aiming for Olympic gold.

Actually @Reservoir13, does it have to be a sport she is "good" at? Maybe sport isn't her talent. Perhaps your DD has other talents or interests she might excel at and sport can be something for fun and to keep fit? I would guess this is as much about comparing herself to her sister's achievements as wanting to find a sport.

The one thing that makes me feel better about sailing is that it's not as shit has having a pony.

Seriously, if the kit for a sport doesn't fit in one bag it's going to be a hassle!

That said, we bailed out of swimming for the sailing because swimming hours are just so incredibly unsociable.

@reallyreallyborednow

Adam peaty didn't start competitive swimming until he was that age. I'm not sure it's held him back!

As a coach I never say never. I had a kid come to me at 12. Not particularly talented at first glance. Within 2 years they were national squad for acrobatic gymnastics.

Most of these early start sports are “too late” only because coaches won’t look at kids over a certain age and shove them into a recreational stream.

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

My son was in a small swimming club that suited him as he's also autistic. Covid cut hours right back and so he tried for big twin club that has competitive and non competitive stream.

He's gone from a club who never ever thought he'd do well to swimming alongside the national swimmers because he makes every session and trains hard and coach wants to give him the chance to get as far as he can.

And he's 16!!!!

Love coaches like you that recognise those who also have the will and not just the inate obvious natural ability.

Korfball - similar idea to basketball/netball (mixed boy/girl teams!) but height is less important than it is in basketball because of various rules in the game, and most UK players (both kids and adults) generally start as absolute beginners - all clubs are very welcoming

Trampolining

My brother is v small for a man, but is a rower. Yes, he often coxes...but he also held a British record at one point. It's a sport not started until this age, so definitely won't be behind the others.

Athletics, track and field. Loads if different things to do, although as a coach I am a firm believer in all kids trying a run, jump and throw and not specialising too soon. Most athletics clubs have different ability group, if you don't want to compete there should be no pressure, but there are all levels of competition available from local mini leagues, up through the levels.

If she is coming new to something, and not naturally sporty, then a competitive team sport may be a little disspiriting as the others will have been at it much longer? Unless it’s something quite niche. I think for this reason I would look mainly at individual sports where she doesn’t have to worry about being good enough for the team and where she can practise the sport without it always having to be about competition.

Netball is rubbish as a short person (cue lots of short netballers disagreeing with me )

I am small and not naturally sporty but enjoy things like kayaking, skating, cycling, skiing, climbing, archery where it feels as much a skill as a sport, iyswim, and can be done in a totally non competitive way.

I may be projecting here...

How about rugby, a position for everyone no matter the size.
We have girls join at all ages with no previous experience, it's as much about the social aspect than it is about being a competitive sport.
A lot of clubs have new and developing girls teams so you'll probably find she won't be on her own in just starting.

Horse Riding

Outdoors, once she has learnt to ride, there are various different disciplines within the sport. Pony club is brilliant for variety too.

One thing I would be mindful of as a parent is attributing body sizes to be perfect for different sports. People often say that petite women are perfect for being gymnasts but then the likes of Ellie Downie are winning world standard medals. Same with distance running- in the British Olympic trials this year the commentator said how one of the athletes has the 'perfect build' for marathon running. That athlete was sectioned a few years ago with anorexia.

Eating disorders are rife in women's sports, especially ones where young men and women are told the smaller they are the better they'll be.

Sorry to derail the thread but think it's an important message.

People often say that petite women are perfect for being gymnasts but then the likes of Ellie Downie are winning world standard medals

Ellie Downie is 5’2!! Not even above average for a gymnast.

Again though, the “perfect body type” argument only really exists if you’re going for elite. Whilst I agree in many cases it shouldn’t be a reason to keep someone from a sport (and believe me I’ve seen it at elite level where athletes aren’t selected for national squads, despite results, because their body type is “wrong”- and it’s nearly always because they’re on the “bigger” aka “fat” side), if you are trying for elite there’s no escaping the fact a 6ft gymnast can’t rotate quickly enough, they’d need to be able to jump record breaking heights to be able to complete a double straight, or that a 5ft rower unless superhero strong simply won’t get the stroke length in to be as efficient.

@reallyreallyborednow I was talking more about her muscular frame. She has talked openly recently about how as a teenager she was told to diet by coaches because she didn't look like a typical gymnast.

What about sitting volleyball if there's one near you. It's fun and a bit different.

@KibeththeWalker

My DS sails competitively. It takes up all the time in the actual universe and is really quite expensive. 2k for a decent junior boat, 1k for a trailer if you don't want to be constantly loading onto a car. Probably at least £500-1000 a year in kit and replacements for broken things. Up to £200 for a weekend inc fees, petrol, hotel if necessary etc.

It's an amazing sport, but not for the faint-hearted if the child wants to be 'good'. Obviously you can have a lot of fun floating about in a borrowed boat at a local club for next to nothing, which is great. But being 'good' is a different kettle of fish.

My son sails. Hires a boat for 6 quid a session at the local sailing club and they have lifejackets etc. Also very sociable. The initial training fee is offset by club membership and not too pricey as they're not for profit and keen to get new members, especially girls and women.

As you say, it doesn't have to be competitive to be enjoyable. But they do race twice a week and it gets pretty competitive!!

Friend's daughter loves climbing

Swimming is a good all round sport for fitness. Girls cricket is good for hand eye coordination and is a team sport. It is massively popular at the moment. If your dd can play tennis she would probably enjoy cricket. Plus there is the social side and a lot of games have a BBQ at games.

How about cycling- ds does cyclocross and also road cycling. With cyclocross you can start with just a basic bike and a helmet.

It is great fun, the training is social, and you can easily do competitive cycling if you want to.

You are absolutely fantastic with all your suggestions. I am really touched that you all thought along with us to find something that may suit her! I'm now going to look for clubs in our area so I can present her with a range of options.
Just to be clear, I really have no intention of pushing her to excel in a sport. I have one kid that has to be driven to/from 3 trainings per week and that is enough . However, my elder one sees of course the example of her sister and she just wants to discover something she is good at too. And I do feel sports would help as she is in fact quite sporty and likes playing outside (once I've managed to tear her away from Roblox). Again, many many thanks, you are wonderful!