Hello everyone 🙂
Can a few of you have a read of this list and tell me if you would consider going to the doctors for help? He's 10 years old, mum has always had a gut feeling since toddler age that he's more unique with his little mannerisms than other children, for example he would line his toy cars in rows of colour or size.. he'd have explosive Meltdowns where his eyes would glaze over it was like sensory overload, a dark room and no physical contact would be the quickest way to calm him.
I will keep the list to things he still does now..
Chews on clothes and toys until he makes holes in the fabric
Deeply upset/angry at any criticisms/unfair treatment
Licks his hands as they feel dry
Doesn't like the feel of paper
Eats well but very fussy with food, will inspect foods for anything "dirt" looking i.e a herb? Browned breadcrumb? Will try new foods but prefers to eat the same 4 or 5 meals
Repulsed if someone drinks from same cup as him or touches his food (even family)
High expectations for himself that set him up for failure
Very, very, smart, loves facts and remembers hundreds, reading and spelling is advanced- he's at year 11 levels but very poor handwriting
Feels awkward with intimacy like hugs and physical touch, does not seek out these things
Refuses to do anything messy like cooking, painting, getting muddy etc gets noticeably repulsed if his hands get dirty
Likes to play on his own, has a set way he likes to play with his toys, if another child joins in he dictates how toys should be played with
Low self esteem and confidence
Social anxiety that manifests itself in appearing rude and unfriendly with new children he meets
Has a little circle of friends and isn't interested in adding to that circle
He notices if someone's feeling upset and will ask if they are ok
Does not want to try new things, like swimming or riding a bike, prefers to stay in the house but enjoys himself once he's been encouraged outside
Not sure if these observations are what every child does at some point, or a sign of anxiety, a product of nurture (i.e. his dad also hates being messy, remembers facts.. mum has low self esteem and social anxiety, likes things tidy and in their place) or are these signs he may be on the autistic spectrum? His parents separated 3 years ago, he's never wanted to discuss his feelings about this, he asked why it happened but never wanted to discuss how he felt.. he sees both parents equally through the week since it happened.
Mum loves his uniqueness and tries to not make a big deal out of these things but is concerned. Wondering if he needs some support, he's getting older and obviously now self conscious he does different things, I think it makes him feel embarrassed he's not like his friends? Perhaps he needs help with his mental health, it could be depression/anxiety? The virus has worried him a lot during lockdown, he knows licking his hands is counterproductive to keeping safe but he can't stop himself.
Can I get some advice please?