Two year old injured mouth now won't eat - help!

[Harveybell]

Hi all.

This is my first post - I'm after some advice or just anyone who's experienced similar.
On Saturday morning my two year old son fell and cut the top of his gum above his front teeth.
Basically since Saturday he won't have anything near his mouth except his dummy and his milk bottle. He isn't a fussy eater so it's heartbreaking that he won't eat or drink anything else but milk. He says his mouth is sore which I know but I've tried everything. It's like he now has a 'fear'.

He's been to GP who said he did tear his frenulum (the bit above his lip and gum) but it looked like it was healing fine. GP didn't seem worried about the lack of food and said keep trying which we are but to no avail. Even his favourite lollipops or juices.

I'm going out of my mind with worry that he's developed some kind of psychological fear of putting anything in is mouth now (apart from the dummy and milk bottle!)

Please any advice would be appreciated x

Also to add - GP did say he would expect it to be another 3-4 days to heal further and I'm going to call health visitor tomorrow for more advice. But thought I'd ask here too!

Have you given him calpol? He might be in pain?

Try not to worry too much I expect he will eat when he's ready. In the meantime offer anything nice that's his favourite food/drinks etc that might tempt him as you are doing.

My son knocked 6 teeth into his upper gum in a bad accident when he was 2 1/4, they literally disappeared we thought he had lost them, they grew back down in time. You can imagine the trauma and pain he suffered but did manage in a week to put things in his mouth. Even if its liquid or soft things he'll get back to normal.

Dental hygienist here. The frenum is pretty sore when it is torn or cut, and GP is right takes quite a few days to heal. I wouldnt worry too much, he will eat when he feels better, I think the beginnings of a phobia would include a dummy and bottle. Try not to focus on it and be as breezy as you can when he refuses to eat, a simple "ok!" and let him down to play. Icepops and juices if made with real fruit will be quite acidic and therefore quite tender on the wound so that could be why hes gone off those. Stick to water or very weak squash and keep trying at mealtimes. Hope he heals quickly!

Apologies for the long post, but I had a similar experienc with my daughter when she injured her tongue a few years ago (she was 7 at the time so a bit older). I would say to monitor very carefully a we ended up with her quite poorly after she refused to eat for a week. As you say, she became "phobic" about putting anything in her mouth. Our situation was complicated by the fact that she had a bad reaction to the antibiotics and was very sick.

She refused food for 6/7 days and we ended up at A&E with her. She had been monitored at the GP but they weren't concerned about the lack of eating as she had been taking fluids. However, I knew something was wrong as she was really weak and became a bit delirious - she became obsessed by talking about food but refused to eat.

Anyway, after various tests at A&E she was admitted to hospital with something called "metabolic acidosis", which I believe is caused by starvation. She was put on a drip overnight and recovered quickly after that. I don't want to alarm you as I think our case was extreme but definitely follow your instincts. If I had listened to the staff at the GP surgery I wouldn't have taken her in. The doctor at the hospital actually told us off for not bringjng her sooner.

This all happened after just a week if not eating, although as I said she was also being sick for some of that time.

Hope your LO feels better.

I've just seen you said that he is eating milk - that's good and should keep him going for a bit, but keep an eye out for any changes to his behaviour.

drinking milk

Similar happened my DD before. She was messing about in the bathroom, slipped and hit her mouth on the bath and bit her bottom lip. She wouldn't even drink anything. I can feel your worry.

Eventually she did start taking small bits and then once she realised that was ok, she went back to eating normally.

It's good that he's drinking. Try not to stress. Plenty of hugs and pain relief and he'll be ok in no time.

Thank you everyone for your words - I feel much better reading that he'll hopefully start up again soon. Especially @housetips & @ladyslipper11. That's encouraging to know.

I've tried calpol as best as poss through the syringe but he's in hysterics at the moment when I go near him with anything he thinks will go into his mouth!

@DippyAvocado - thank you too for the advice. Yes we are keeping a massive eye on him. He's his usual happy self, playing and being bubbly. But as soon as we notice anything different we'd of course take him in to be checked further.

It's nice to hear these things can be overcome but it's tough on day 4 when you're heartbroken for your usually greedy little one! Xx

@milddrpepperaddiction - aw bless her I'm glad she began eating again. This is all I hope happens with us. As soon as he realises he's fine with no pain he'll begin taking in food again. x

This is common and may not go away when he is no longer in pain because he may have associated food with pain.

While that sounds really scary, the best thing you can do is relax about it all. The more stressed you are, the more he will feel pressure. Remove all pressure from eating. Offer everything you normally would plus the milk you know he will eat and don’t comment. Don’t plead, don’t bargain, don’t try to reason with him and if he eats anything don’t praise or make a big deal.

Google Division of Responsibility, it is a technique used for children with ARFID disorder and it is very useful for helping with psychological issues for food refusal.

Thank you I will take a look should he not improve. He was always so into his food and a wide variety so I'm hopeful he'll soon find his feet again. If not it's good to know there's support out there x

Can you try the "baby trick" with calpol?

Draw up the syringe and push it into the teat of the baby bottle. When it's in his mouth like a regular bottle squeeze in the Calpol?

Is he on cow milk? Be wary of giving him too much. 16-24 oz a day can cause constipation. Will he take water from a bottle?

Have you offered something cold like an ice lolly or frozen flannel?

I'm guessing he's not going to be compliant with having his teeth brushed at the moment either is he? :-(

Sending strength and patience.

No I just tried tonight to leave his bottle with water and he's gone tantrum! So I've given milk just to make sure he has something. Doesn't usually wake for anything in night but likes bottle to be there.

He's just too clever - tough to outsmart him! If it's not dummy or milk in a bottle he's not interested.

I'll try the calpol trick though thank you!

will he eat jelly? it is sugar and water, so a few more calories.

Unfortunately not. Nothing but the milk bottle. Tried giving calpol again and it ended in tears. You just feel so guilty x

Perhaps it would be worth considering paracetamol suppositories? You can get them from a pharmacy, this would give him some pain relief without taking it orally? Small kids don't have the "social hang ups" about this in the same way that adults do

Perhaps trying something different at bedtime wasn't the best idea. Bedtime is when they are most exhausted and least receptive.

Why not try water in the day? You can also dilute milk, give smaller quantities, leave a snack plate in reach.

16-24 oz of cow milk a day and no food/fibre is literally a recipe for a severely constipated child.

When he "goes to tantrum" in the day do you let him have his moment without giving in? Wait with him calmly whilst he demonstrates his emotion and frustration and then when he is calm, have cuddles and talk about it.

A tantrum is not a reason to follow a child's will. It is a child expressing themselves. Did you talk about "no milk at bedtime" or did you spring it on him? Children need to know what's coming/changing just as much as an adult.

Yes, he has hurt his mouth but he should be putting more in by now. Pandering to him is. It going to help him to get past this and allowing him to fill up on cow milk (apologies if he's having another kind) will actually make him unwell in the long term. He is not a baby cow, he can't survive as if he were one.

Some of the advice you are getting on this thread risks exacerbating the problem. Of course he is your child and you can do what you want, but from experience with children who refuse food after a traumatic event, if you approach this wrong you can end up with a more long term problem.

Do not trick him in any way with his milk bottle. Do not swap it for water or sneak Calpol in there, you only risk putting him off the bottle completely. If you need to get paracetamol in him talk to the pharmacy about suppositories.

Do not try to reason with him or talk about it. This is pressure and risks making him refuse food for longer. He is scared and nothing you can say will convince him otherwise because he has experienced the pain associated with eating.

Keep offering a wide variety of things plus the milk bottle. You may be stressing that he is only drinking milk but, believe me, it will be a lot more stressful if he drops the milk. I suspect people on this thread do not all have experience of a food refusing child that ends up in hospital because they won't eat anything at all.

Hello all, thanks again for your inputs. I have just come off the phone to our health visitor who reassured me that milk will see him through until he is willing to try eating again.
She said his injury is the equivalent to a tongue tie being cut so will be very painful.

She said as children of that age have no sense of starvation - keep offering his yoghurts and soft foods and keep giving his milk... so I think I'll continue this for the next few days without pressuring him and hopefully he'll feel better soon.

He was playing with his ice cream truck this morning and pretending to eat. So 🤞🏻

Just thought I'd update with a tiny bit of good news - my sons childminder messaged this morning with photos of him - eating 3 pieces of toast! So happy!

That's great news, very encouraging!

Aww well done wee man!

Yes I'm really pleased. Since yesterday morning he's had more toast, biscuits and a lollipop!
So considering where we were on Tuesday it's definitely an improvement... x