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[Cindyloo20]

Needing some advice here...
My DD has severe baby eczema, it got so bad in September her skin was pretty much peeling away. Back and forth to the doctors we finally got referred.
After trying ALOT of different creams/emollients we feel as though we have finally got it under control although it still has its bad days and still has patches where it seems red/itchy.
We live away from home so my mam FaceTimes me often. Every time she calls she tells me how bad her skin is and how itchy she is etc, as if I don’t know this already! She tells me how she would like me to have it for one day to see how my DD feels, I would take it from her if I could!
She is also convinced that my dog is the cause for her eczema getting worse, our consultant thinks it’s the cows milk because this is 99% of the time what makes symptoms worse, so we are on sma alfamino.
She keeps telling me I should put my DD first and get rid of our dog, we can’t have tests until she is 1 and she is 8 months. I don’t think it’s our dog as she was with my sister for a week and my DD skin actually got worse when she was away, but my mam seems to think I’m lying about this?
Sorry about the rant, but what would you do?
Just to clarify if we have tests and our DD is allergic to dog hair, my sister has said she would take our dog for us.
Thanks if you read this far 🙈

Your problem here is your mother. She sounds emotionally abusive of you.

Stop face timing your mother and get rid of cows milk (dairy) in your dcs diet.

I was like this for 40 years. Creams apart from steroid cream wouldn’t even touch it

Drs were no help. I probably have other allergies but according to my drs surgery there isn’t any such thing as allergy testing. Only found out by accident when I visited the US and couldn’t eat the bread as there was so much sugar in it for 2 weeks

Got told by dr it was a coincidence that not eating wheat made patches of my eczema disappear. Was told that if I wanted to go down the route of trying to identify allergies then to cut out wheat for 2 weeks, then dairy for 2 weeks then eggs for 2 weeks and then come back after 6 weeks and he would prescribe more creams.

I hadn’t eaten wheat for 2 weeks already and then 10 days without dairy as well and for the first time in my life my skin was clear.

Hope your dd gets better.

Thanks for your replies 🙂
What so I say to make her stop making these comments? Do I just ignore her?
I’m struggling with my mental health and this is just making me feel 10 times worse, like I’m a bad mam and it’s my fault her skin is this way.

Well I think you could look at your relationship with her in general. Is this typical? Is she supportive, positive and encouraging in general?

I wouldn’t say so. She always seems so negative about everything. She thinks she knows best because she has had experience of having children and always says ‘listen to your mother I know best’.
Every time I say something to her she turns it around and gets upset!

She sounds quite difficult to deal with. Perhaps this is affecting your own mood and self esteem. Sometimes it's only when we have our own children that we begin to think about this stuff.

Tell your mother that at the first negative thing she says you will end the call and do it. Then don’t face time her for a few days and do the same every time. You know your daughter better than anyone. My ds2 had really bad eczema as a baby and it’s so hard. He’s 22 now and gets it on his hands but that is about it now.

I'd ignore your mother, she sounds unhelpful.

I'd also push for allergy tests (skin prick tests or blood test) for the 14 most common food allergens asap. They can also test for things like dog saliva or dander at the same time. My DD had these before one year. Some consultants have a concern that the tests aren't so accurate very young but with such severe eczema it sounds worth it.