Can you sleep train a 7 year old?

[FestiveGanesh]

I have one DC who is an amiable, academically able, outgoing sort, who fires on all cylinders 99% of the time. DC has a good circle of friends with no major fallings out and no bullying.
Home life is stable with fair, relaxed attitudes.
DC has been a bad sleeper for the past two or so years in as much as doesn't seem to need anything like the recommended amount of hours. Will get up in the morning and get on with the day, with no ill effect. DC will go to bed quite happily at around 8.30 and is allowed to read/play quietly until 9, then it's lights out.
However in the past few months, DC cannot fall asleep. Seems to have developed a sort of separation anxiety ("I need you to be with me"/"I want a cuddle")
There is no getting up and coming downstairs, but calling out/crying/ getting up to go to the toilet. Last night was a killer: bed at 9, still awake at midnight, through to nearly 1. Then woke at 3, still awake until well after 5. Up at 8.30, full of beans.
Right now it's the holidays so it's not such a problem, but I can't go on like this.
I've asked again and again if anything is causing worry -no. Too hot/cold - no. Tired - yes. Hungry/thirsty - no.
Help whilst I still have a modicum of sanity.

At 7 I would probably involve them in creating a bedtime schedule with a clear end for adult interaction. Leave a drink, small light on to read by and books but let them know at x time mummy needs to leave and if they can't sleep they need to stay in bed and read/play quietly.

Thanks Thebaby. I was already planning on setting up a list of jobs/tasks that are well within capability. Perhaps making DC responsible for a 'bedtime charter'could enhance that nod to being more in control.

I'll be following with interest, we're having the exact same thing.

My 9 year old limited sleeper has lights out at 8.30 (we have to be up early, you may need to adjust my timings to give you a sensible rising time). If I can still hear him tossing at turning at 9, I generally get into bed with him, and he's asleep within 15 mins. This happens generally once a month.
Mornings - from 5am, he can read. Nothing more exciting - he was waking earlier and earlier as toys, playing etc was too tempting. We get up at 6, out the house at 7.
No disturbing others unless there is a problem, because it it night time.
I try not to tell him to sleep, but do say he needs to rest, and let others sleep.
At weekends he can get up at 6 as normal, and get breakfast (toast or cereal) while DH and I snooze a bit longer.

On the other hand, when we fly at silly o'clock in the night (my flight from home to my parents is at 0140, so we do this a couple of times a year) he bounces out of bed at 11pm and then stays awake for the next 20 hours quite happily. Means I never need to worry about carrying him through Frankfurt airport, unlike his 7 yr old brother..... But this is a pretty limited benefit!

I've tried going in to help settle, and ignoring. It can take 25 mins to 2 hours, either way...

Both my children have had times where they have needed me there to go to sleep. Nine year old still wakes us up several times a week in the night. Loads and loads of time spent outdoors helps enormously though especially if you get out early as it helps set the body clock. We have been going for some good 2 hour walks this holiday and my Dd is sleeping loads better

Unfortunately, it being the holidays had made it a little more difficult as we've been catching up with people all over the place.
This seems to be anxiety related as DC will often say, "I don't want to ever leave you", or "stay until I fall asleep", or "I'm scared that I won't be able to sleep". Sometimes DC says "I'm scared but I don't know what of", or "I feel like everyone hates me."
We've had no family losses this year, we've had no incidences of bullying at school, and DC is generally liked (although can domineer a small group). Any conflicts have been quickly and easily resolved.

We spent several hours outdoors yesterday with walking & very active play. We did low sugar food, limited TV, cut stimulation at 7, warm bath, low lights, soft voices, relaxing music, multiple reassurances and it made not one not of difference.DC was awake in own room/bed from 9-11.40 when I went to bed. DC came in with me as had been sobbing loudly (sorry neighbours!), fell asleep within 20 mins.
There is no fundamental difference in room size, temperature or light levels, or bed comfort, so this seems to be a need for company.
When we are at school, there is no such worry - I barely get a backward glance once we get to the gate, and there is always upset and disappointment when the holidays start as this means X days of no school.

This can often be a tricky age and they start asking questions about death and start worrying at bedtime. My 9 year old will often cry at bedtime and say I just feel sad. I think it will just be a phase that will probably pass. I regularly sat on my ds floor until he went to sleep at the age of 7. Tried not to make it a big deal and thankfully in time it passed although he often still takes him a long time to go to sleep at the age of 11. My friend had a similar problem with her Dd but ended up taking her to the GP and in my opinion it became a much bigger problem as the child became quite phobic about bedtime.

Apart from the anxiety/attachment, I just believe that people need different amounts of sleep.

I need tonnes, Ds2 too. Dh needs less. Ds1 needs hardly any at all.

This dawned on me, many years ago, after Ds1, who has ASD traits, was sleeping less and less, reading a lot into the early hours. But because he was doing well at school, wasn't bad tempered, what could I say or do?

My closest friend who is senior partner of law firm, works regularly till midnight, 2am. Needs little sleep.

I have bouts of insomnia, so I get the not necessarily needing 10-11 hours of sleep.
We have had losses among family & friends, so we have already talked about those sorts of worries, so I don't think it is anything related to that. Just seems to be general clinginess and random, unfounded anxiety.
Doing my best not to make a big deal. In fact, if we could just get DC to stop calling out and either read or play quietly when sleep is elusive, that would be a massive step in the right direction.