Bad at School, Good at Home

[Wysmum]

I know this is new to some because it is usually the other way around. My Son of 6.5 yrs is in constant refusal mode from start to finish in school, unless of course he wants to participate. At home, no problem, I instruct him to complete the work and 9/10 times its done without a fuss. He always seems to need a little prompting and direction, constant reassurance that hes doing a good job. A bit of an attention hog really. Hes now in year 2 and although they have 'tried everything' not much has changed at school. Previously he would have kicked-out or flipped chairs and tables in an angry rage if he was asked to do something. Now it's not nearly so dramatic, a much calmer no I wont do it. We have worked with the school with rewards and consequences. I cant say much influences him to improve his behavior at school. He could be in a great mood, fully engaged with the topic but the moment the daunting task of writing anything down occur he will shut down. He really loves Maths but again he doesn't want to put pen to paper. Hes very scheduled and particular but not tidy. Sleeps very well (mostly 11hrs) but has a somewhat irrational fear of the dark. He is a constant contradiction.

So after much investigation I have decided to go for Cranial Osteopathic Therapy. A little back story - We had a very traumatic birth (Class A Emergency C-Section / Cord Prolapse) and he was a troublesome child at nursery. Many have recommended this treatment to release possible stress points left over from the birth.

My Question is - Has anyone tried this for a similar issue or can offer any advise at all?

Many thanks

I am a little confused.

You say that 9/10 times he does what you ask without a fuss however then go on to say that he needs prompting, direction, solid praise and lots of attention. That sounds like a lot of fuss that a teacher with 29 other pupils wont be able to give to him.

If he is used to not doing his work and getting lots of positive attention at home for this and only lots of attention then that may be the reason he does not do it in school...

I'm no expert in primary school but it sounds a little odd to me that "no fuss" sounds like an awful lot of fuss.

Sorry, I see how that could be confusing. I mean 'fuss' as in refusal and arguments. His work gets sent home because he wont do it there. He always seems to need prompting and direction to get the work started but nothing laborious and while I generally cook dinner he will pop up with a 'is this ok' like he's unsure of his work.
I have been partial my home schooling him for about 6 weeks now and this behaviour has been continuing on since reception. I hope that my help at home isn't making the situation worse simply because it's the only way the work is getting done right now

"constant reassurance that he's doing a good job"

Is he an anxious child would you say?
Is he easily distracted (not just to keep him on track but in general)?
How is he socially?

Anxious, yes, afraid of the unknown, like Halloween knocking by himself he struggles with but in a group setting its ok. Partly distracted yes because of course if he enjoys the task he's dedicated to the finish. If I'm asking him to get dressed, 10 mins later I might find him playing. He is very social, enjoys playing with the children in the street and working in a group on D&T projects a school. We are waiting on a peds appointment for possible testing which has been half a year in the making. I'm quite open to this possible alternative therapy if it will help.

I don't want to jump the gun here but if you say he is engaged until the point of writing and needs help getting started, could there be a possibility of dyslexia or some sort of processing difficulty? The behaviour could be trying to mask low confidence in actually completing or starting the task. Though if you say this has been happening since nursery then maybe not. I'm a (secondary) teacher and often find dyslexic children need more scaffolding and if they don't know what to do/how to begin they play up instead. Even if the whole class has been told they sometimes need it saying again one to one... Similarly for those with low self esteem in general or adhd (may struggle to focus but can also be intensely focused on the right task)

I'm reluctant to revert to the old "bad behaviour = SEN" thing that is common on mums net but just wondering if it has been considered at all?

Could the school get an educational psychologist to observe him. It would be useful to know if this was "just" poor behaviour (in which case maturity will help) or if there is sonething else underlying it.