Overweight sons

[Temporaryanonymity]

My sons were always lean and thin, even had to buy adjustable waist trews for them.

Over the last year or two they've both piled on the weight. The oldest isn't so bad as he walks a mile or so every day. They've both become less active as they've got older,especially over the winter.

They are 11 and 9. I try to keep them as active as possible. We play tennis, go on bike rides, walks etc. I try and get them out every day but work often gets in the way.

They are always hungry, often saying they are right after a meal. I really feel for them because I was a fat child and I have issues...

So, given my issues I need to approach this sensibly. Any advice? My youngest son has the biggest problem.

Well, the changes need to begin at home. What food is available in the home that they're obviously over-eating?

What's a typical meal for them? Do you buy soft drinks or much junk food weekly?

Rather than just one meal could you outline a typical day’s eating?

I don't buy soft drinks at all. I occasionally buy crisps.

They go to breakfast club so assume they have toast there. When we are at home at weekends I make scrambled eggs/boiled eggs for the oldest. The youngest likes weetabix.

They take packed lunches to school. I give them wholemeal sandwiches and a piece of fruit, now and again some kind of biscuit bar.

After school, well it depends on my schedule but could be be something like a homemade goulash with veg. Yesterday they had spinach and ricotta pasta with a tomato sauce because we had all been out and about. My eldest cycled 25 miles and was ravenous and I had played tennis with the youngest one. He did have an ice cream after tennis.

I did order a pizza on Friday night to go with our movie. They did tuck into that but I don't buy takeout very often. Maybe once a month or so?

That doesn't sound like an awful lot for boys of those ages, they're growing.

It'll be interested to see what the replies are OP

I have a dd like this. It’s not what she eats, it’s the amount. We hardly have any crap in the house. But she’s always starving and asking for food. She seems to be able to last about an hour without being really hungry again. It’s so wearing trying to keep it under control. I don’t have an answer, just wanted to offer sympathy. It’s so easy to blame the parents, but there’s never any advice on how to deal with children with large appetites.☹️

my son is tale sane, he's not fat but has certainly got chubby. I keep boiled eggs, chicken drumsticks, sliced meat in the fridge which help. I also make peanut butter flapjacks which keep him full fpr ages. He has definitely slimmed down....before he'd come in from school and just help himself to a whole packet of biscuits so.I've stopped buying them.
We don't di dessert after dinner but if they are still hungry can have fruit/yoghurt or maybe some jelly if we have some ready.

Can you have a rough look at the calories going in to give you a better idea? My oldest are 9 & 11, they admittedly don’t have a very good diet but I’m working on getting them to eat new/better things. They are both healthy weights.

In the packed lunches they will have a ham sandwich, yoghurt, cheese, fruit, sometimes a brioche & biscuit or crisps. Could they be hungry after meals so snacking?

Snacking is my downfall

teen ds(16) is fat. He has stretch marks because of the weight he has gained. The problem for us is that he hates all sports, always has done. doesn't own a bike and doesn't want to. It's good that yours are active.

My two dds both gained weight at the age your ds are now, but lost it again in later teens and are now both slim and healthy. Puberty leads to big appetites and some weight gain but if they are leading healthy lives it will balance out as they stretch.

They don't seem to be eating that much unless the portions are very big.

Are they getting snacks else where? Do they have pocket money and can they go to shops by themselves?

Thanks for sharing your experiences.

Snacking is an issue. If I bought (for example) a pack of chicken they would eat it all. Same with biscuits. So I don't buy biscuits. We have never really done snacks so this is new territory. But honestly they are always claiming to be hungry.

My children are like this. One is active so gets away with it-the other less so.
They definitely ask for food when they’re bored so I try to keep them busy but that can increase their appetite!
I find there’s just so many ‘special occasions’ that lead to high calorie foods-ice creams on days out (I try to limit or encourage soleros or something), party food etc. Snacks are so prevalent and tied into activities it’s hard to avoid them

Portion control, plus snack control.
I'm lucky my kid who was tending towards plump liked fruit, could fill him up with things that are lower calorie than chicken. Also a very distractible kid, and likes going on walks with us.

Raise the protein?

So they're eating "snacks" between meals? How do you mean "a pack of chicken"?

They'd not eat that as a snack would they? Because a pack of chicken would surely be a meal? And for more than one person.

What are their portions like?

Limit snacks to fruit only....or if there's a long gap between meals, allow them something like three crackers with a bit of peanut butter or some cheese.

Not chicken.

And if they're always hungry, they might need more protein in general. Eggs are good which you already do for them but lunchtime maybe they need something other than a biscuit bar...perhaps an extra piece of cheese or some nuts.

One of my DCs is like this. Would snack constantly if allowed and says they're hungry after a normal sized supper.

To deal with the snacking I now carry and stock my fridge with cut veggies - cucumber, carrot & peppers. If they're hungry they'll eat this. If bored there is whining for other snacks which I ignore. For a 'treat' I'll allow fruit (apple, mango, pineapple) otherwise it's veggies. I get through a cucumber, carrot and one or two peppers per day.

At supper they are allowed extra veg portions if still hungry and fruit for pudding with one spoon of plain natural yogurt.

Ice creams are for holidays only.

I've been doing this for six months and it has been working.

One more thought.., do you know what they have at breakfast club. Ours - despite being "healthy eating" - serves stuff like Rice Krispies and other useless cereal which contains sugar and won't fill up growing boys. (I'd be starving by 10am/snacking if I started off my day with an empty cal cereal.) If you're in a position to (and I realise not all will be), maybe you could see if breakfast could be made more nutritious and filling for them (boiled eggs, whole wheat toast, fruit etc) and maybe they wouldn't want to snack so much.

They are hungry because they are growing fast and children that age often grow out before they grow up. The 11 year could be on the verge of growing 5 or 6 inches a year , DS was 6ft at 13. DC are 20 and 22 and are still very healthy weights for their height

TBH MN really isnt a good place for dietary advice, too many posters with food issues, get proper advice if you need it,

children that age often grow out before they grow up this is simply not true.

OP says they've "piled on the weight" though without her adding their height and weight, it's hard to judge.

Overweight is not the same as a child who is muscular for example. Some children are more muscular but that tends to be children who play a lot of sport.

Wow. I have the opposite problem with my 11 year old soon, so often wonder what children eat to be heavier. He has a big bowl of cereal, then toast or waffles, lunch box contains sanwiches with veg, crisps, cake and fruit, evening meal is usually lots of veg but also carbs and protein and always a pud. He snacks on popcorn and biscuits too but despite that everyone always comments on how skinny he is. He is on 9th percentile and you can see all his ribs. I do worry that he should be heavier as he doesn't look very robust. So in answer to your question it doesn't sound like they are over eating.

Ajas, OPs children are active

It was certainly true for my children and for me when i was that age.
weightgain before growth spurts

"Weigth gain and growth spruts

Kids also tend to get a little heavier just before they have the growth spurt. Toronto paediatrician Miriam Kaufman explains, “That weight gain actually fuels some of the growth, especially with boys—they seem to need constant fuelling.”"

Cut down on the bread. If they’re eating toast for breakfast, sandwich for lunch and pizza for dinner that’s far too much bread for one day.
Ds1 puts on weight if he eats too much bread products despite being very active.
As soon as I cut it back, he lost the weight.

By a pack of chicken I mean a small pack of ready cooked chicken, the sort you'd buy for sandwiches.

At breakfast club I know they just get two slices of toast. It will be cheap white sliced I am sure.

They are tall, to pick up on earlier points. The 11 year old is 5 foot 5 at least. The younger one is shorter obviously.

Have you checked their weight and height in the NHS calculator

Too many parents claim there children are 'always hungry' or 'straving' when there not, no child who is getting 3 meals a day is starving and really shouldnt be that hungry. If they have been paticularly active or only had small meals that day then give them a small, healthy afternoon snack or after dinner snack other than that they can have a piece of fruit or vegetables if they are that hungry.
Its much more likely that they are just bored and feel like eating something tasty than actually hungry or they might even be thirsty as children often mistake thirst for hunger, do they drink enough water everyday?