My son recently turned 3 and started pre-school in January. He is often incredible sweet and loving, and certainly can look almost cherabic (just mentioning this to be clear that he isn't ALL bad!). However, he frequently lashes out when frustrated which is several times a day.
He hits out at me, his dad, his brother. He sometimes bites his brother and for the first time last week, bit a child at pre-school. Yesterday at pre-school he pushed some children over and they needed to speak to me at pick-up. Pre-school have suggested 1-1 assistant for him next term to help get to the root of his frustration and to help his behaviour which I have enthusiastically agreed to. However today he pushed a little girl down the stairs at softly (thankfully, she was fine but upset) and so I am just feeling really down about his behaviour. It's not a mater of he might push and shove, but when.
Today I removed him from softly and took him home. Shouting at him doesn't work, pre-school have told me that too. So I talk to him and explain to him, but I am not sure whether he really understands and I am sure he would do it again. I have decided today that I can't take him to soft play, and I will have to be v close to him in music etc, classes because I can't risk him hurting other kids. Luckily we live near forest and so I can take him outside more once weather is better, but it's hard to keep him occupied otherwise.
To wind back a little I should explain that 1.5-2.5 years old was quite hard with him. His speech was a little delayed, and he used to head-butt the floor etc. in frustration. He grew out of that, but then started pulling his hair out leading to months of blood tests before we realised this was what he was doing. He has grown out of these phases, and we feel in many ways he is easier. However the aggressive behaviour is becoming a big issue.
I knew pre-school are on it and will help me, however what other channels can I go down? I do feel quite alone really today especially, really makes me feel down. My husband is totally involved, but at work long-hours so doesn't experience the ore-school chats or soft-play mortifications etc.
Would love to hear from anyone else with a similar experience?
He has a brother aged 4 who is at school who we have never had this sort of problem with, and a baby sister aged 10 months. The baby means I can't focus on him 100% at home too, as I have to feed her and change her etc. Because of this, I am worried he has too much screen time at home... which I never thought I would allow and I do feel guilty about however.... it all feels impossible without it!
Thank you.