4 year old Daughter to have heart surgery

[MeelyBobsMummy]

My DD was born with a hole in the heart and a leaky ventricle. When we adopted her 1 1/2 ago there was no need for surgical intervention but the hospital has now decided it’s is in the best interest of her to have the hole repaired. This will mean major surgery with 4 to 6 weeks recovery. I wanted to know if there is anyone who has had a similar experience and how they discussed with their LO before surgery? I don’t want to scare her to death but she needs to have an idea of what’s going on. She’s just turned 4 this week and not the slightest bit effected by the hole in heart. Thanks for reading

Sounds like it is going to be an open heart OP.

Can you tell her that her heart is perfect for a little girl but she is growing so fast and so well that the Drs need to make it work for a bigger girl so she doesn't get sick.

She is going to hospital, she will go to a room with you where someone will make her go to magic sleep with a mask over her face.

When she wakes up you will be there, she will be a little bit sore because she now has special zip in her chest that only Drs can open.

I assume she has had ECGs and echos before now.

I've been out of cardiology for a while now and didn't do much paeds stuff. But adults are told to hold a cushion or wrap a sheet round their chest to support the wound while coughing - the physios show how.

A special teddy would work just as well, get one that has a body about the size of her chest.

Actually one of my students made Plasticine figures and filmed them, this was meant for a child going into hospital for an op.

Thank you very much for your suggestions, much appreciated

Just wanted to wish you luck
Children don’t really see their illnesses or get bogged down by them - they are very resilient and just want to carry on playing.
So I wouldn’t make a big deal about it - they say a day for age so tell her maybe 4 days in advance what will happen, where she’ll go etc.
Have loads of new books and toys on hand for her to play with when she’s well enough again after the operation.
Hope it goes well

Ps you do have to try not to show how terrified you are to the kids - it’s very hard I know

There's a CBeebies programme called Get Well Soon that I found really helpful when DD was due to go into hospital for a (minor) operation.

There was also a specialist play therapy nurse at the hospital who spend AGES playing with DD and explaining what was about to happen and letting her play with all the equipment.

Oh, and they had an iPad with easy games for DD to play on one-handed whilst they put a cannula into her hand before the operation. I was amazed at the thought and care that all the staff had for DD.

There's a forum called Heartline Families that can offer support and advice from other families in the same situation. If you are in the South West there is also Heart Families South West who have a fb group. Hope the op goes well. My DD has had 11 heart operations and I found lots of helpful hints from forums.

Heartline do some good books too.

You should discuss this with her care team. They will have huge amounts of experience talking to children about why and how in an age appropriate way.

The thing is to make it factual so she doesn’t find it scary. A simple narrative. Your heart pumps blood around your body to help you move. Yours has a little hole in it, a bit like the time you cut your knee. Peter will sew up the hole like . You will be tired after but after a bit of rest in bed you’ll get stronger. It will make running easier when you’re big

There’s some great tips, thanks everyone. I really appreciate the time you’ve taken to respond

I hope this all goes well for you and your DD.