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Children's health

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Original poster

What to do about DS's infected cut, SH related.

77 replies

Mindgoinground12 · 27/02/2018 15:27

So a few weeks ago i posted about DS1 -17 declining mental health

Previous Thread

Things have actually been doing surprisingly well! Although Ds has still been self harming hes back working, talking to freinds. He SH quite deeply a few days ago let me dress it, close it - with steris and clean it but its become infected, he is very anti doctors and is refusing to go get it looked at, i thought things were going so well and dont know what to do, thinking phone his case worker but dont want to go behind his back because it will set him of, so do i just put ant biotic cream on and hope for the best. I know this proberly isnt the best place to ask, put MN has always been there for me before so just want some opinions.

OP posts:

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 27/02/2018 23:22

Hopeful bump...
Hes now asleep but cut is weeping might have to try and force him - a 17 year old lad

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WhatsGoingOnEh · 27/02/2018 23:33

DEFINITELY don't leave it. But can he not go to the Dr to get it sorted out without revealing that he's self-harmed? I'm sorry if I'm really clueless about MH issues, but in a case like this I think I'd prioritise getting the infection treated (immediate risk) over revealing his SH to a caseworker (more of a long term situation).

uncharacteristichose · 27/02/2018 23:34

I'd call NHS 24 and see what they say. Ideally go to doctor obviously but if he's against it I get that it would be really difficult. It's great he's let you see it though, DD wouldn't tell me for months and wouldn't dream of showing me. That's a real positive that he trusts you!!

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 28/02/2018 11:32

Thanks for your repliers, WhatsGoingOnEh he dosent say hes SH but its preetty obvious given the 30 odd scars around it.

uncharacteristichose thats a good idea actually about nhs direct, yes it took along while, he often wont tell me for a while sometimes i notice first but baby steps it comes with time.

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Sidge · 28/02/2018 11:42

Is it definitely infected? Sometimes a little bit of weeping is normal, but if it's mucky, red, swollen and he's unwell he probably needs oral antibiotics.

If he won't see a GP would he consider seeing the practice nurse? I'm a PN and deal with wounds (including SH) and can liaise with the GP for antibiotics if needed. Otherwise if he'll let you take a photo you could show the GP the pic and s/he may prescribe on that basis - not ideal but they should be sympathetic to the situation.

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 28/02/2018 13:38

Oh its deffintly infected! Theres a red patch about 5 cm by 4cm round the cut us is coming out and hes feverish. He does need anitibiotics, its not so much doctors its any medical professional in any capity in any building. To be fair on him hes had some rubbish experiences in the past.

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KurriKurri · 28/02/2018 15:00

Oh that does sound like it definitely needs attention espceially if he is feverish.
Could you phone the doctor and explain the situation and then he/she could perhaps speak to your son. Would he see someone if he was assured there would be no comment or judgement just treatment and then home?
At worse could you take a photo of the wound and email it to the doctor at least that would be something if he won't let someone look at it.

Good luck.

Sidge · 28/02/2018 15:05

Ah. Then he needs antibiotics - phone and ask the GP to do a script for you to collect.

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 28/02/2018 16:01

Im gonna phone at 5:00 -how our surgery works if you want to speak to a dctor. Im just a bot worried that it needs hosp treatment- DS is prone to infection, this and SH dont mix very well! i drew a line round it this morning and it spread by about 2 cm, but will get oral anti-bs first and see if that helps. I may just be overacting

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Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 01/03/2018 12:38

if anyone wanted an update, phonedand they said he had to be brought in the doctor on end of phone was horriby blunt. DS is worse today, red has spread id say to about 6x7 cm, i had an idea if he got very bad to phone an amulance? if doctor wont prsecribe ovr phone or phone 111 and see if we can get a gp out? i dot know what to do am at breakng point

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KurriKurri · 01/03/2018 12:55

Oh gosh I don't know what to suggest, I think I would phone 111 and ask for advice - although it can be a very long wait for them to call you back.

Is he feeling very ill (feverish etc.)? If so I think I would consider an ambulance. He really needs to be seen - he may need IV antibiotics now.

MummySparkle · 01/03/2018 13:01

Can you get him in the car to 'go to the shops' then go to a corner shop and then on to the drs?

He needs to get it looked at, it is only going to get worse. If he really is refusing treatment then I would call an ambulance. I've been picked up by ambulance to be taken to hospital to dress SH wounds before, I think they will take you in.

Call 111 for advice and explain to them that he is anti medical intervention. They might have a suggestion

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 01/03/2018 13:02

He only has a temp of 38 it was 36.6 two days ago so climbing put not awful. Its just hard i know what he needs to do, but hes so against it if we get a doctor round or ambulance he will kick of- a lot and thats the last thing he needs. but it may need to happen, but i alos have other DC at home. Arggg, im such a failure of a mother , i believe it needs IV's but to get him into hospital and stay in hospital is another thing

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Steeley113 · 01/03/2018 13:06

You don’t need an ambulance, you need to call the Gp and expected he’s refusing to come in, refusing to engage but his arm is very clearly infected. They either prescribe antibiotics over the phone or send someone out, I guarantee they just prescribe over the phone for you.

minmooch · 01/03/2018 13:08

You are not a failure of a mother.

I have no advice I'm afraid - I hope somehow you can get your Ds to a go/ a&e soon and with least emotional outburst.

NolongerAnxiousCarer · 01/03/2018 13:13

That's getting dangerous he needs it treating before he develops sepsis if he hasn't already or he could die! If by caseworker this is someone from his mental health team then yes get them involved. I hate going behind DHs back to speak to his CPN but sometimes it's necessary for his own good. His CPN is always happy to keep my input confidential from my husband though if I ask him to, in fact he always checks if I am happy for him to tell my husband I've called or not. If you can't physically get him to the Dr or hospital then call an ambulance and see if they can pursued a him.

Phosphorus · 01/03/2018 13:16

Could you sign up to Push Doctor?

It might be easier for him to deal with a doctor remotely.

It's not hideously expensive, and they can prescribe.

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 01/03/2018 15:08

Ive tried phoning his case worker to no avail, i think if he gets worse ill phone 111 at the moment hes very fragile so dont want to push him.
Steeley113 i did phone doctor they said i had to bing him in,

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SilverHairedCat · 01/03/2018 15:11

What does he think will happen if he doesn't see the doctor? Does he have capacity to understand sepsis and what that can do to him? What does he want to do? Is there a breaking point for him where he'll agree to be seen or is he waiting for sepsis to kick in?

NoStraightEdges · 01/03/2018 15:18

Oh, love, you're not a failure.

But you do need to get this sorted. What are your options?

Phone again at 5 and explain again.
Ring 111
Take him to OOH later
Wait and see what happens
A&E

If you leave him and he becomes seriously ill not only will it be much worse for his physical health, it sounds like an extended stay in hospital with procedures etc will be really bad for his mental health.

Taking him now will also be bad for his mental health, but possibly not as bad and it'll be much better for his physical health.

So on that basis, it'd be better to get him seen and deal with the fall out. (Easy for me to type, eh?)

Good luck

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 01/03/2018 15:22

Thats the probem Silver hes had infections before and got very sick and the last few times hes been in A&E /on wards its been awful he constently tries to leave and has refused treament for SH cut befor (and OD's but before hes been sectioned for this) but he hasnt had a very bad infection for a while im very sure he knows that this could potentialy kill him if left long enough but weather people listen to that i dont know. So its a mix of not wanting treatment to die and despising hospitals

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ivenamechangedtomanytimes · 01/03/2018 15:25

I agree NoStraightEdges but i dont know how to get him there hes 17 so legaly still a child but still in that over 16 bracet which makes things more difficult. I dont no how to force a rather large strong 17 year old lad bymyself it would be impossible.
On a wound update-as ive just had a peak, its spreading but less red, so atleast a small headway

Original poster

Mindgoinground12 · 01/03/2018 15:26

Sorry name change there dont know what happened!!!

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Bobbiepin · 01/03/2018 15:31

Would it help if he can take control over the process? SH often focusses around control and everything suggested so far centres around what you are doing rather than what your son can do. Maybe have him call 111 to get advice and have the call on speaker but he answers the questions. Once he can see he will be treated as an individual and not judged he might be open to seeing a doctor or further treatment.

Above all, be supportive (as you evidently are) and remind him he is loved. I would possibly imagine there is an element of shame associated with this episode that is preventing him from seeking help.

You're doing a great job, don't get disheartened.

NoStraightEdges · 01/03/2018 15:54

Can you get a doctor to do a home visit?

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