I realise this is a big ask - depression in children/antidepressants - experiences

[OKJustOne]

Hi there, I realise this is very sensitive but does anybody have a child or know a child (preteen) that has been put on antidepressants and if so, how did they get on?

I feel like it's the last resort and desperately concerned about the side effects etc but I'm wondering if it's the only answer (if counselling etc has been sought and they think medication may be the answer?)

I'm wondering if I should move this to chat for traffic?

Hi OKjustone,
Sorry, I don't have direct experience of ADs for young children, but it was going to be the next thing to try if CBT hadn't worked for DS at age 10. It did work - was pretty lifechanging at the time - so we didn't get as far as the ADs. What help have you and your child had so far? Has anything been offered?

Thanks. We've had 6 sessions: family and individual with a family counsellor, who has suggested cahms and our gp has now referred DC.

DC had previously seen a school counsellor, who suggested we seek more specialised help (hence the family counsellor).

Counsellor said she'd never met a child quite like DC, anxious and very intense.

DC is generally ok in everyday life but is not enjoying their childhood as they should (worrying about stuff too much, over-thinking etc).

It's never great when they look at your child and tell you it's something too unusual for them to help with, is it? We had to wait over a year to get someone who felt they knew how to help DS.

That sounds tricky if your child manages to plough through everyday life but just not happily. I suppose he/she may just be one of life's deep thinkers.

I'm guessing you've already tried all the obvious things like decent bedtimes, fresh air, exercise and comedy films?

How experienced is the family counsellor? Your child might not be that unusual -the counsellor may just be inexperienced

AD in a child would be unusual and probably not necessarily

I hate when this is always the first suggestion but there are no signs of autism are there?

No, no autism. The family counsellor is very experienced.

Sadly, we have a history of mental illness in our family and DC presents themselves in a very similar way.

I think they are far too deep and worry too much, far too much for an 11 yr old. This has been going on since they were about 7/8 and has gradually gotten worse.

Could it just be clinical depression?

It's not that the counsellors are passing the buck or refusing to help, they just want to make sure that DC accesses the best care for them.

And, yes, we're doing all the right things, more sleep (though they struggle to sleep as can't switch off brain!)

More exercise, fresh air and comedy box-sets.

No change at all.

They can be useful if there are significant biological symptoms present (flat mood, poor sleep, poor appetite) but evidence would suggest that talking therapies are more likely to be helpful, and only to use AD's if symptoms are more chronic and resistant to treatment. I think there was a recent study that suggested only one of them - Fluoxetine - was any more effective in children than a placebo (but things change, so check out the facts yourself of course).

Hopefully your CAMHS assessment will help. Not sure how old your child is, but it is also worth remembering that the things you can do as a family will be the most important and have the most impact - resolving any family stress or difficulties, ensuring a good routine, including eating and sleeping, encouragement to participate in activities at home and school, positive communication and rewards/incentives, pushing for an assessment if your child is not meeting normal developmental milestones or managing school or friendships, attending to your parenting style. You might find more info on Young Minds website. Good luck with it.

I'd guessed you had probably thought of all that - but fresh air, exercise etc are essential anyway, even if they don't help with this, so thought it was worth a mention.

If anxiety is an issue you should be careful if offered SSRIs. I had them as a teen and they made my anxiety much worse. Some are known to have that affect now, but drugs companies don't tend to admit to issues if they can avoid it.

As an adult, meditation has done more for me than any medication ever did.

I'm surprised - although I knew things had changed.

I was put on Prozac at about 12/13 for several years until I was old enough to refuse to have it anymore. So 16 if I recall correctly as that's when you are able to decline treatment.

I understand now that Prozac is not a good treatment option for teenagers/pre teens - but happy to be corrected.

It was ...vaguely helpful at the time but not really a fix. Oddly I've found it hugely helpful as an adult now I can make my own choices about what I take

DS started Fluoxetine as an older teen - not convinced it helped, as it seemed to transform depression and anxiety into an unstable cocktail of very up/down mood swings, to the point that he worried about any 'up' days because he knew there would be a corresponding crash of mood to follow.

(Prozac = Fluoxetine, as I understand it?)

The problem is that they are very resistant to solutions, has an answer for everything, cannot meet us half-way with trying anything.

Never wants to do anything, no clubs, prefers not to socialise (though has a big group of school friends).

Very negative and lacks motivation, though is doing very well at school (very conscientious).

Has huge trust issues and feels vulnerable at school (big secondary, they chose it and we've offered to look at smaller schools and they are warming to this).

There has been absolutely no trigger. Loving, inclusive family, spend a lots of time together, we have a comfortable lifestyle, a dog, good range of toys and entertainment at home. We go for lots of walks with dog, have been trying different sports at weekend. Dad and I rarely argue, we're a pretty normal family. I have other children who are happy and nothing like their sibling.

If you ask what Is really bothering them it's 'everything' then will articulate beautifully how they feel and sadly, it is like talking to those in my family who have suffered terribly (DC knows nothing of this) one of whom
took their own life.

DC is really good kid, a kind, loving, thoughtful child who is great to spend time with. They are my PFB and they (and my others) are my world. I just wish I knew the answer.

Yes Prozac is fluoxetine.

OK, your child is NOT your family member who died. They are their own person, with genes and influence from both sides of your family, and a very switched-on parent who is taking them seriously.

They are not somehow doomed to follow the same path.

(That's meant entirely sympathetically - I have a sib with serious bipolar disorder, and I have to try not to catastrophise.)

And - hormones, if they're 11? Puberty is a trigger all by itself.

I was like this at 11, and 18, and when pregnant, and postnatal, and can feel it grinding in again for the oh so lovely menopause.

I hear you but I cannot stress how they are so similar. You are right, luckily, they have their Dad's genes too, which counters this.

I've been very careful not to blur the lines or to assume they will be like this, or to put words in their mouth but I can't ignore it.

They really have absolutely no idea about the family history, it would be detrimental, I think they will take the information and assume that they are the same. They have already disclosed to me feelings and thoughts that are extremely similar, asking me if they are depressed.

I make a massive effort to be very pragmatic and to conceal my concern and worries. They don't think I worry at all and I believe that they need this for stability.

There are elements of puberty in there, but they present as massive strips, with door slamming and then tears and apologises.

Very different to their general demeanour.

Strips? Strops!!!

I was on anti-depressants for a while From 13. Have mild to moderate bipolar. Since managed to treat it through diet and exercise but I only tried doing this after being on the meds for a few years

Has he had a b12 blood test? Does he exercise? Does he get enough sleep? Does he meditate?

Not enough sleep, working on that, upping the exercise. Not had blood test, might be worth it.

Meditating - we've tried that, different types but just cannot switch off brain, or buy into it.

Did this start with the start of secondary? A different school made a huge difference to one of ours.

No, started about 4 years ago, aged 7/8. No trigger, other than moving from ks1 to ks2 (same school, simiilar size classroom etc).

It's not been an overnight change, either, just a gradual awareness and emergence of feelings