Okay, basically I found out the other day that my friend has never taken her kids to the dentist. They are both now over 10. It came out after a comment her daughter made in front of me. I was obviously very shocked and friend was very upset when it came out.
I have tried to talk to her about it since - she cannot really explain how this has happened - she does have a dental phobia which I think made her put it off initially but I think the last few years she has felt trapped and scared about going for fear of being in trouble.I don't need lots of horrified comments - believe me I have enough of those myself. I realise she has compromised her own children's health and believe me she appears to be the most regretful and remorseful person. She actually seems relieved it has come out.
She knows absolutely that she has done wrong and says some days she feels so guilty she cries and she can't look them in the eye. Both kids look fine to me, although I am fairly sure the younger one will need braces as his look pretty crooked. But I am also aware this isn't the point.
Anyway, I gave her an ultimatum and as a result she has booked an appointment for herself first and then the children a week or so after. I think she is planning on coming clean with the dentist when she goes herself so that difficult convos don't necessarily take place in front of the children.
How should she approach it do you think? Presumeably just come clean and express remorse? Will there be any consequences for her - I'm not going to forewarn her, but just want to be prepared - will the dentist refer to social services for example? I can categorically say there is no other issues within the family - I see them loads and they are loving, involved in the kids lives, really good family unit. Kids doing well at school, happy , attached to parents etc.
Just don't really know what she should expect. Will it depend on whether the kids teeth have been affected or is it neglect anyway? Thanks in advance.