DD Smoking

[emilyrobinson4321]

New to this site. Wasn't sure where to post this, apologies if it's in the wrong area.

So my DD has been smoking for a few years now, I tried everything to get her to stop but gave up when she left school in May. I smoke (bad habit, I know, don't get on at me!) and haven always smoked inside the house.

My DD is now asking me if she can buy an ashtray for her bedroom to put her fags out in, so she doesn't have to go outside to smoke. I said no but it's really straining whats normally a good relationship.

She'll continue smoking even if I say no, so I'm considering allowing her to buy an ashtray for her bedroom and smoke in there (as well as the places I smoke: lounge, kitchen, bathroom).

Thoughts?

You could ban smoking in the house full stop and that includes yourself, you're making her smoke anyway via passive smoking so there isn't much point in making her stop.

Aside from that I wouldn't like smoking in the bedrooms because of the fire risk but anything else you've said you don't really have a leg to stand on.. She's probably got home made ashtrays in there anyway.

Your house stinks. Those are my thoughts.

Agree with gamerchick. You have to lead by example, or you don't really have a leg to stand on.

I agree. Ban smoking in the house full stop. Show some committment yourself

When you say you "tried everything" what did tha entail - trying to give up yourself?

Same as everyone else. Why don't you both start vaping instead?

Get some more smoke alarms installed as well.

If you smoke and in the house as well there is no way you can get her to stop doing either tbh. If you are concerned the suggest you quit together. Otherwise I'm afraid she will never listen. She is simply following your example.

I hope you havnt got small children in there plus it's a massive fire hazard.

Both of you start vaping. It's cheaper and your house won't stink because it will do.

I vaped for two years then gave up for good.

who still smokes in their house?

All my Dutch relatives still smoke indoors and I am shocked every time I'm there by just how awful it is

Why do you want your DD to stop smoking? What difference would it make?

If you smoke in the common areas of the house then she's been smoking as long as you have (all her life?), and if you carry on she'll carry on, whether there's a fag in her mouth or not.

The only argument that wouldn't make you look like a total hypocrite or a complete idiot is "It's a fucking disgusting habit, I was stupid to get addicted in the first place, let's quit together." Because at the moment your DD's lungs have absolutely nothing to lose, do they?

Common sense this one. I know it's your House but it's also your daughter. You must smoke outdoors if you expect her to.

You could say "I've realised how bad it smells now, so there will be no smoking in the house and I am going to cut back/give up. Will you help me ?"

Poor DD that she had to grow up in your stinky house. Sorry but that's awful.
How old is DD now?

Wondering if the OP will actually come back.