How to help 6 year be dry at night - please help.

[WalkingThePlank]

My 6 year old still wets himself at night. We did put him back in pull ups as we just couldn't get the bed linen dry quickly enough in the winter but decided to give it another go last night. Typically, he was dry when I went to bed but woke up soaked through this morning.

I am predicting weeks of non-stop laundry to no positive effect. How can I help him? He just doesn't wake up when his bladder is full.

My experience is that there isn't much you can do really and that you just need to give it time. Took until nearly 7 here and then it literally happened overnight.

We stuck with pull ups as less stressful for DD. We see a paediatrician anyway and I did mention it to her once at 6, she said it was very common and not a problem.

So I relaxed, stopped trying to do anything and just waited.

I will check in for any advice going as we have the same problem with 6 year old DD. We were also advised that not much will be done until they turn 7 but will be trying to get her on the list for some help soon.

Have you got the making the bed double trick? Waterproof sheet/sheet/disposable bed mat/sheet. Is godsend with Middle of the night changes.

Will he agree to being lifted? I know that's not best practice but it got us over a hump with elder DC.

Waking her up to go to the toilet when we went to bed, worked for us after about a week.

Also more water during the day, and toilet twice at bedtime (when doing teeth and then just before she switched her light off).

We also got her to help strip the bed in the middle of the night, so it wasn't just a case of her cuddling up in a nice warm duvet while a parent sorted it all out, but was a bit of a hassle for her too.

It is a myth that you will only get help after the age of 7, between the ages of 5-7 if it is impacting on the child's life then they will help (under nice guidelines) I didn't know this and waited for my 8 year old to be seen When he was 7.
He is still in nappies at night as pull up do not hold enough.
And even then I have to change him in the night and sometimes he does still wet through.
We have just tried the melts and unfortunately it has not worked.
I wished I got him seen earlier but everyone told me the magic age of 7!
Eric is a good site, also make sure he is drinking enough as that can impact as much as drinking to much.

Have a look at ERIC website (enuresis foundation) they have loads of good info and I found their helpline hugely helpful. We used a bedwetting alarm. First time when my son was about 8 it didn't work, bit left it a year til he was 9 and it worked a charm. You will get there in the end, I promise you, and you probably won't have to wait as long as we did!

Thanks for the ideas so far.

Have looked at ERIC and I think the problem is that DS is not woken by his full bladder and there doesn't seem to be a solution to that.

Do I go to my GP? I can't see what can be done though.

Definitely go back to the gp, when you get to see the specialist they will probably ask you to do a Sort of diary, we had to measure how much ds was Drinking and how many.
Measure his urine in the day and then write down If wet at night and even weigh my ds nappies.
The specialist will be able tell from this if it's a hormone problem, or if bladder to big or to small ect.
Maybe your son would benefit from the alarm to wake him when he is wetting.

There's a hormone released by the brain that wakes us if we need to pee (sorry, cannot remember what it's called!). But the age we begin producing that hormone varies pretty wildly. Like walking and talking, you can encourage the process but you (or your son) can't make it happen through force of will. Corster's advice about ruling out other problems is spot on. If nothing is out of the ordinary though, it's back to pull-ups and patience I think.

I've heard of the hormone - it's called vasopressin. I seem to have plenty, hence awake at this time. Anyone know if you can test for it or do anything to stimulate its production? My 5yo barely produces a thimbleful of wee when made to use the loo one last time before bed, but is always very wet within an hour or so of falling asleep so using pull ups for now. Thanks for sharing that you can get help before age 7 coster - I was resigned to waiting another 18 months before being able to get any help.

My son was on melts as they thought some of ds problems were the hormone but for him it didn't work.
That's why they will do the charts for a bit as the specialist should be able to see a pattern.
I'm not sure if there is anything other then the melts or a child just naturaly producing it as they get older.

My son was 6 when he became dry at night. Like a PP said it just happened. He had a few mornings when his pull up was dry so we risked it and that was that.

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg111/chapter/introduction

Read this, hope you find it helpful.

I spoke to the School Nurse today who said that there is a Enuresis Clinic. She didn't know if my 6 year old would qualify for an appointment so she had to call them but predictably there was no one available so not sure when/if I will get a call back.

Have done lots of research now and I do think that he just isn't woken by a full bladder. It's not a lack of the hormone as this would cause him to wet himself earlier in the night. I guess they'll want us to do diary, which will stall things further, and then try the alarm thing. I don't really understand the logic of that as it wakes the child up after they have failed to be woken by a full bladder. Surely you need something that wakes them before they empty their full bladder. It apparently takes months to work and I would imagine that has more to do with the children's bodies changing with age. Can't help thinking that there isn't really any help to be had.

I also don't want to take DS to the clinic, I'd rather go on my own. They are not going to actually test his body in anyway so I feel that him taking time of school and being there makes it an issue for him.

The alarm worked immediately for my DS. He was five at the time. He had never had a dry night before, he was dry right away. It was like magic for us. It goes off as soon as there is a teeny bit of dampness so they wake up just before they empty their bladder. That helps them to recognise when they need to go before they need to go.

I believe alarms often work within two weeks, rather than months.

I used to run an enuresic clinic. They are very unlikely to see you alone - the whole point of it is that your child has to be a willing participant in the process. After all, it's his issue (NOT a problem, just an issue that needs some action).

Make sure he is drinking enough in daytime hours - he should have all of his fluids between say 0800 and 1800. He also needs to go to the loo every 2-3 hours. His bladder needs to filled and emptied regularly. The bladder is a muscly bag, and like any muscle needs a workout to become strong - a strong, toned bladder sends a stronger "wake up" message to the brain. A weak flabby bladder can't hold much urine before emptying, and doesn't send a strong message.

Avoid berry drinks, as well as tea, coffee and fizzy drinks. Avoid milk later in the day as it's a food as well as a drink and takes longer to digest than plain fluids, so the fluid part gets eliminated later.

At bedtime do the 3 Ts - toilet, teeth, then toilet again. Double voiding encourages full emptying of the bladder.

Don't lift before you go to bed, as unless the child is fully awake it promotes the "wee whilst you're asleep" message.

He's still quite young, so I wouldn't get too stressed, but it doesn't hurt to make some small changes.

Good luck!

Thank you all, especially Sidge for your wise words.

I have just ordered a Hypnotherapy CD as it happens. Will be interesting to see how that goes.

Still having this problems with my ds (just 7) too.

One of the things that they have suggested is making sure that he drinks enough during the day - I'm pretty sure he doesn't as he never drinks anything from his bottle at school. And then when he does drink it tends to be in the evening rather than earlier (I suspect also that it's partly psychological as he also has occasional accidents during the day, thus I'm sure he thinks that the less he drinks in the morning, the less likely he is to have an accident at school, despite trying to explain it's not quite like that).

I've been doing a 'challenge' with him to make sure that he is drinking enough and that it's earlier in the day. Much easier to do again now it's the holidays. But that's also supposed to help to stretch the bladder which means that it will be able to hold more, which is another element apparently in getting through the night without any problems...

I have just gone through this with my 6 and 7 year olds at the same time and now seem to cracked it!

They are allowed to take a sml drink to bed, make sure they go to toilet just before they get into bed.

Then every night I put a children's bed pad into their bed and then woke them up / carried them if necessary to the toilet when I went to bed (normally around midnight) to go to the toilet. For the first 2 weeks it was hit and miss whether I caught them in time before they peed themselves in bed, but if they did the pad caught the wee ( they slept on the med may I didn't put s sheet over it as it is nice and soft and means no washing!!, unless they wee in duvet, bought a couple of cheap ones from tesco for ease of washing).
In the last week or so, both have not peed themselves before I wake them up / still carry them to toilet, but both have big wees when I take them to toilet even if they are still pretty much asleep.
I think we've pretty much got their bodies in a nightly rhythm now and will keep taking them to the toliet every night at same time until they either wake up themselves or they are 18 lol!
We tried everything else but this really had worked, whilst agree about hormone I think this is not getting their bodies into a routine when they are not quite capable of waking themselves up yet when they need a wee.
Hope that helps ??

Used the Rodger alarm for my dd who was about 7yo and wet every night. Within 3 weeks of using the alarm she was completely dry. First week was v hit and miss but we got great results v quickly. We had tried lifting and a number of the other suggestions made on this thread, but they just didn't work for us. Happily the alarm did. Wasn't cheap but it has the advantage of being wireless and comfortable to wear, and dd was v happy to give it a go.

So, yesterday evening I mentioned to DS that when he wakes in the night he should consider whether he should go to the toilet.

Well, he did this and was dry in the morning. He was so chuffed with himself.

Obviously one swallow doesn't make a summer but this is a good step!
The school nurse contacted me to arrange a referral to the enuresis clinic but I missed her call but it feels like some progress is being made.

Well done both of you! If nothing else, you all get a well-deserved morale boost. Hope it continues

Just thought I'd update. We've now had 4(!) dry nights off the back of us discussing that DS should consider getting up if he wakes up during the night. He did go to the loo the first 3 nights but didn't last night but we've had 4 dry nights. I'm really surprised.
Not sure when we can say we've cracked it though.

You're well on the way!

We've gone backwards I'm afraid. We had 6 nights, 5 nights and now 2 nights dry. We're going to start the Hypnosis CD tonight. Not sure how we're going to get him to lay still for half an hour!!