My son is nearly 2.5 years old, he currently has no verbal communication, refuses to sign, has poor attention and eye contact, finger flicks and spins in circles, he occasionally flaps his arms and shakes his head.
He developed normally until 11 months and then regressed, he showed better communication efforts at 6 months than he does now, he no longer claps or points to things either, but will take you to things if he wants to show you something. He doesn't startle at loud noises, and he is fine with lots of noise and people around. He is mild mannered and really laid back and he is more likely to cry when he is frustrated than lash out.
He has been under community paediatrics since he was 14 months old as he used to walk with significant bowed legs, which have now resolved. But I had to fight to keep them seeing him over this. He see's audiology and speech and language at my own referral (as everyone wrote me off as neurotic), SALT have only become concerned in the last 6 months, and nothing they suggest is beyond what we have been doing since he was 4 months old. His health visitor is useless at his 2 year check asked me to sign a form to say 'what action WE are taking for his delays' I questioned this as she is almost impossible to contact and neither her nor the paediatrician have made any referrals! She just said it's just a standard form that just says action is being taken!
He always has a cold, but the GP responds that he is a child and that it is normal. In the last 2 sessions the Audiologist has admitted that his ear drums are 'dull' and he has got fluid in ears, they remain adamant that his hearing is ok, but over the last 3 or 4 sessions I struggle to see the responses that they say are their, the last session I saw no response at all! Moreover he is so clumsy and unbalanced, even for a 2 year old. But she remains adamant that his ignorance us due to autism not hearing loss and they wouldn't do anything about his glue ear.
I struggle as I don't feel we have the relationship we should have, he is my world and I love him, but I wish I understood him better, I haven't heard his voice in so long I cannot remember what it sounds like. I am not deluded, I have accepted he is most likely autistic and the life I wanted for him is going to be very different. But I still can't shake the thought that there may be other issues being ignored because, despite not being formally diagnosed, they all clearly feel this is down to autism.
Has anyone else had similar experiences? my son is surrounded by the 'normal' children of friends and family, nobody understands and I feel so alone and isolated with him. He is due to start nursery soon and I fear that gap between him and other children is about to get worse, schools and families are set to get involved and help him, but I fear because he will behave and is so easy with new environments that even they will feel they don't need to help him.