3.5yo DD nasal and has large adenoids - am I foolish to wait?

[Lioninthesun]

About 6 months ago I went to an ENT specialist on NHS and they said DD has enlarged adenoids but that they wouldn't do anything about them until she is at least 4/5yo. She snores, is tired in the day but refuses to nap, is a mouth breather and was very dribbly at the time. The main thing for me is that she was falling behind with speech and language development compared to her friends. However, I thought I would have to heed the advice.

Now though I am wondering if I should pay out and go private - her language is very nasal and she always looks tired in the mornings after a night of snoring. She is still delayed in language and her nursery picked up on this (although they aren't great as only when I said I think it is her adenoids for the fourth time did they suddenly say "Oooh I think it might be...ADENOIDS!" - which made me feel I was banging my head against a wall!). They had bought up the delay and said they were concerned as she might need SALT.

Am I being pfb trying to do this before she starts school? I have looked on NHS adenoidectomy web page and it says there are few risks and it can be done in 30mins and the patient can go home straight afterwards. Why were they reluctant to carry this out 6 months ago? Am I missing something? I am feeling a bit angry that I have just sat about waiting as the months she could have been catching up and expressing herself clearer tick by...

My Dd had her adenoids out and bilateral grommets last January. She was just 8 and I had been concerned about her mouth breathing /speech for a long time but had been fobbed off as she wasnt getting frequent infections. When we eventually managed to get her assessed she was almost deaf in one ear.

After the surgery the difference in her speech was phenomenal and her hearing is almost normal now. The surgeon said her adenoids were some of the biggest she had ever seen.

Wrt swimming. I think we were advised not to for 3 months. Dd got terrible infection in France last summer after swimming in the sea but other than that no issues at all.

Thank you Methe that is really interesting. Glad your DD is happier now and it was finally resolved!

Both my boys have had their tonsils/adenoids out when they were very young...DS1 had his out at 3.5 and DS2 had his out at 21 months.

We paid privately for DS1 as he virtually no speech at 3.5 and the ENT consultant said they weren't prepared to do anything until he was 7 as there was every chance the situation would improve as he grew. He had glue ear and constant ear infections due to his huge adenoids.

When we saw the ENT consultant he had no idea why we were there and within 2 mins of walking into his room and without even examining DS1 yet he said that he needed them out because he could hear how nasally he was just with his breathing. He had them out 2 weeks later and was like a different child. His speech caught up almost overnight and within 2 months he was on a par speech wise with his peers. He is nearly 10 now and doing fantastically well at school.

DS2 is slightly more complicated as he has a condition which is related to his airway. He had constant ear infections as well and they removed his to try and help the ear infections and create more room in his airway. He was tiny before he had the operation and he seemed to grow immediately after he had it done. Incidentally the same surgeon did both operations :-)

I'm so pleased I don't seem to be over-reacting here - I was a bit worried I was getting too concerned about it, but hearing everyone's stories about how quickly the issue can be resolved it does make me feel justified!

I have today had an email from a local private surgeon quoting the following for the first appointment to be on 6th Jan, which would be great and obviously very soon!
Initial consultation: £175.00
Paediatric audiogram and tympanograms: £125.00
Adenoidectomy and grommets: £2100 (estimate)
Post-operative review: £125.00

I am wondering what people think - should I wait to see what response I get from NHS or should I just go for this? I need to juggle a few finances about and it means I will have to wait for a new car if I pass my test in January which I have been saving for...

It's so sad that you are having to consider paying out so much for your child to have a much needed operation to improve their quality of life!
My child had the operation at 18mths as he also had quite bad sleep apnea with massive adenoids and tonsils so any hint of a cold his already restricted airways (due to the adenoids and tonsils) were virtually closed up and ended up in HDU needing nebulisers and on occasions nearly had to be ventilated with a tube down his throat as the airways were so bad.

But.... We had really pushed for the operation, they don't like doing it on kids under 4, but they did booked him in for it before it got bad and knew they couldn't leave him so it was brought forward 4mths.

Before he started to end up with hospital stays, the only way I could get them to take it seriously was to show videos of his sleeping (pauses in breathing follow by big gasps - his chest would also cave in a bit)
He also was tired during the day and had bags under his eyes, but his way of coping was to be hyperactive! If he fell asleep during the day he would sleep for hrs.
So what I guess I am saying is push push and push! Take videos, stress the effect it is having on his quality of life.

My child had a constant running nose and would end up with snot caked around his nose in the morning- basically the adenoids were that large it couldn't go anywhere else - anything like that would just help your case.
Hope that you are able to get the help your child needs!! Good luck!