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9 years old and overly worried/stressed

6 replies

ConstantlyKnackered · 25/11/2014 14:38

My youngest dd is 9 and has always been sensitive and easily upset, but this has changed more recently into constant worrying and stress over everything, from schoolwork to spilling a little of her drink.

With regards to homework, she has no need to be worried as she is more than capable of the work. She seems really happy at school with a good circle of friends and not loads and loads of after school clubs, so she has the time to do it.
I've sat her down and explained that as long as she does her best then that's fine, but she just can't seem to let the stress go.

With regards to the rest of the time, she seems happy enough but stresses about things that seem so insignificant and silly things to stress over. She has lots of cuddles and we talk about everything but my dh and his family are worriers and I have an awful feeling this is just in her nature and that no matter what I say or do, she's always going to stress.

How can I help her to stop worrying about stuff so much and just be a happy little girl?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
anewmumatforty · 25/11/2014 19:19

have you seen a homeopath? have you tried Bach flower remedies? x

DishwasherDogs · 25/11/2014 19:24

There's a book called What to do when you worry too much.
It could help. It's a book that you work through and it teaches how to stop worries growing.
It helped dd at the same age.

misshoohaa · 25/11/2014 19:35

Another book recommendation called the highly sensitive child which may help.

ConstantlyKnackered · 29/11/2014 06:38

Thank you for the replies and sorry for the delay, been up and down from the hospital with a sick relative x
I'll definitely try both the books and the Bachs. Dh has a natural stress reliever so perhaps that might help and I'll see if I can put the books on my Kindle now! :)
When I picked her up we had a chat and I suggested a schedule she could perhaps follow in the evening that gave her lots of time for fun but also slotted her homework in in blocks. It's been so far so good for the last few days. :)
We had already written a checklist for her school bag and that had really helped her because she knows she has everything she needs each day. (She does have LOADS to remember - far more than my older ones ever took to school)

Thanks again x

OP posts:
IDismyname · 29/11/2014 06:46

I have a worrier. Take her seriously, because my 'worrier' DS, developed serious pains in his jaw. Had to take half a term off school etc. It was an awful time, and the worrying had been building and building over the years. He was about 12 at the time. I had had no idea.

He's now 16 and has it under control. I would recommend Bach Flower Remedies, a lot of list making, or printing out a weekly/ monthly calendar to maybe fit stuff in. The latter is useful for when she gets to holiday revision.

Lastly, if sleep is an issue, try a good pillow spray.

anewmumatforty · 29/11/2014 19:04

i have an anxiety disorder not helped by misunderstanding my childhood stress so i empathise..another good trick is to turn off electricals an hour before sleep - dim the lights, no tv, reduce the sensory stress. This is actually a technique used in Nordic countries, i have heard, although i started doing this naturally for myself before i had heard anything about it, seemed a natural thing to do. i also read The Highly Sensitive Person - a great resource x

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