OK to leave 2mo crying OR bad dad?

[IndiaBound]

Hi all,

Well DD1 was obviously the dream everyone used to comment on - very independent (but loving), hardly cries /cried, etc.

DD2 is adorable but seems to spend most of her waking day crying - she will stop if you hold her, walk with her to your chest, etc. but this of course is hard to do for many hours of the day.

Funny thing is that after say 8pm she calms, will lie back and look around, and only cries when she is hungry.

Is there always something wrong with a baby when they cry or sometimes is it just not possible to 'fix the problem'.

For an example, I have just fed and winded DD2, she was happy in my hands and I put her on a nice warm sofa. She looked around for a bit but then started to cry. Didn't want any more milk, her dummy, etc. but the crying then stopped, then 5 minutes later started for a couple of minutes, then seems to have stopped again.

So, she seems to have settled herself but quite a bit of crying in the process.

Other times she will not get to the settling point, will scream and after a couple of minutes I find i need to go to her and comfort her - she quickly calms down but then if I try to put her down, crying starts again.

I don't believe you can spoil a 2mo but if anyone has any comments or suggestions, I am all ears.

Thanks as always

Graham

Maybe she needs a cuddle? Human contact is a legitimate need.

Have you thought about a sling/carrier? That way she gets her needs met and you have your hands free to get on with stuff. I had a connecta, was great. Counts as tummy time too.

Comfort is a need - she needs to know her needs will be attended to quickly and consistently in order to form secure attachments, which will effect her for the rest of her life.

If you can't hold her in your arms, maybe get a good sling?

I think that's pretty normal for a 2mo. I'd personally never let a young baby just cry, as you said, you can't spoil them. If your baby wants to be held, just hold her.

At two months she is doing it because she needs something.
As Sandor says it she probably needs some cuddle time with her Mum (or Dad)

I worked on the principle that if picking them up and cuddling them stopped them crying then that's what I should do, so I spent most of the day with a baby on my hip for the first year or so!

I now have 3 very well adjusted independent DCs aged 7-14 who are confident and in no way spoiled. Love and attention doesn't spoil children, enjoy the fact that simply being with you is enough to make someone happy!

Thanks for the quick replies - yes have a Bjorn carrier so guess Dad works on his PC looking over baby's beautiful head.

It is just sooooo different from DD1 that it is a shock (to say the least!).

Yes, sounds like she just needs a lot of cuddles. Our DD2 was like that as well and virtually lived in a sling for the first few months.

You mention the pc- we had one of those banana shaped pillows and often settled the baby on one of those on our laps. It worked well for us- baby napped and we got on with work! The only thing is that you're basically trapped until they wake..

Sounds very normal.

My babies were like this too at that age- I used a sling, allowing me to get on with my housework, and attend to my toddler.