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Squint surgery - what to tell DD (aged 4)

5 replies

littlecupcake · 07/05/2014 22:26

We've known since DD was a few months old that she'll eventually need surgery to correct an alternating squint. It's been like a big cloud hanging over us, but the operation has been booked and the date is looming. We are going for the pre-op assessment tomorrow and have just told DD that she needs to go for a check up where they'll weigh her, measure her, check her blood pressure and listen to her heartbeat - she's Doc McStuffins mad so this idea is quite appealing to her!

The problem is that I just have absolutely no idea what to tell DD about why she needs an operation. We are very lucky that nobody has commented to her about her eyes being 'wonky' so she is completely oblivious to the cosmetic issues. However, the flip side is that I can't think of a way to explain it to her in very simple terms without drawing her attention to something that she is completely unaware of (and would like it to stay that way - we all have things we don't like about her bodies, so I don't want to notice what she is oblivious to, especially if surgery corrects it anyway). I hope that makes sense, it's the rambling a of a very tired and very stressed mummy! I can't say the operation will end the need to wear glasses, because chances are that she will still need them. Has anyone got any suggestions, or could you tell me what you've told your children who have had this done?

She had surgery for something else a month ago, so she has already experienced a general anaesthetic. Fortunately it was a really positive experience. She coped brilliantly and bounced back quite quickly, but was really traumatised about having the cannula put into her hand. Is there anything I can ask the hospital staff to do to make this easier for her?

Any positive stories would be really appreciated, as I said this has been looming for such a long time and it will be such a relief to get it over with. If only I could do it for her, I would Sad

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
yousuf1 · 07/05/2014 23:29

I will be going through this soon with ds son who is 5. Hopefully you get the answers and everything goes well. Smile

Messygirl · 07/05/2014 23:38

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Messygirl · 07/05/2014 23:42

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Boleh · 08/05/2014 00:04

I had one aged 5 ish too. It meant that I could eventually get rid of my glasses 7 or 8 years later and that I didn't get headaches if I forgot to wear my glasses for a little while. Is she not at all aware of the feeling of the lazy eye or the double vision / seeing her nose? I wasn't aware of or bothered about the cosmetics but I can still feel if I get really tired one of my eyes goes 'wonky' and I'm pretty sure I was aware of that then.
I think I vaguely recall being told it would help my eyes and that eventually I might not have to wear glasses. I mainly recall being very sick from the anasthetic (I still have a special anti-emetic one now) and that when I finally stopped being sick I was given my first ever creme egg! At the age of 5 not much else sticks in your long term memory!

sallysparrow157 · 08/05/2014 00:18

Make sure the nurses put some magic cream on, and be aware that we will do everything we can to distract her once she is in theatre whilst we put the drip in, if you can think about something really exciting to her that she can chat about or have a brand new book she will really love this will help but the theatre nurses are great at this and have a little stockpile of toys and books, if the cream is on and she is properly distracted she won't even notice the needle.
If she gets really upset by the idea of it, or if it is hard to get the drip in, they cat use the anaesthetic gas to get her to sleep, she will need to have a mask over her nose and mouth, I show kids the reservoir bag on the vent circuit which is like a big green balloon, if they blow it inflates so I just ask them to blow the balloon up as big as they can and see if they can pop it! Generally kids find this quite good fun at first but often get a bit twitchy and upset as they are drifting off, this is entirely normal and if they do use the gas, don't worry about this bit, she will be nearly asleep and won't remember it

As far as telling her why, maybe casually introduce it over time and rather than saying she has a bad eye now say it is to stop her eye from getting bad when she is bigger (which helps with the 'my eye is fine thank you very much so I want to go home now!' argument!)

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