3yo has got preschool jabs tomorrow, advice please?

[Bearfrills]

I haven't told him that he has to have two injections tomorrow, one in each arm, and I'm pretty much dreading it. I think they'll get the first one in but they'll have zero chance at the second because he'll know what's coming. I've got visions of having to pin him down while he shrieks in rage and terror and Nurse Judgeypants judges me - like when he split his head open last summer.

Has anyone got any advice or tips? Should I tell him or not and how should I handle the actual appointment?

We haven't been through this yet but DS has a lot of hospital procedures and we've always been told to be honest with him beforehand. To tell him the day before what will happen and again on the morning, and be honest that it will hurt. DS always asks if he can have a sticker afterwards when we talk about stuff so I go prepared.

Hope it goes well.

I always took chocolate buttons?

If that won't cut it maybe a fancy maazine with a toy that you pull out your bag at the right minute?

I could explain it all (germs, preventative medicine) etc. to dd and she would sit there very calm and accept it, ds couldn't care less about that stuff at that age! I'm sure the nurse will have seen all kinds of reactions, so dont worry about that.

Also it would be a harsh nurse that judges your parenting when your child is scared and in pain. What's to judge? Nothing.

He went with me when DD had her 13mo jabs so I could reference that. He gets himself really angry when he's upset so I'm just worried he's going to be unhappy about it, he hates haircuts too and has a screaming fit over those (but it's more like an angry 'arrrrg!' than a high pitched scream) so I've got the feeling this will have the same result.

The nurse who used to do the kids needles was lovely but the nurse who does it now isn't very good with children and can be quite openly judgemental about behaviour and parenting (or her perceived lack of).

I thought this would happen. My dd got called at a time when i was having to inject after an embolism. I couldnt do it, dh had to and although where possible we avoided her seeing it at times she saw me wincing. So i thought oh shit, she's gonna go crazy and have a snapped needle in her or the like. My dd1 is really dramatic not genteel at all.

I told her in advance all children get called for a sharp scratch and one day i'll get a call and we'd have to go. I didnt tell her the night before in case she worked herself up. On the day i had a gift bag with sweets and a comic in it. I told her we'd been called for the sharp scratch and yes it is stingy and its okay to cry but we all must have it. She was sad but accepting. Well, we were waiting and all these kids came out crying with stickers. Dd piped up i want my turn i want a sticker.

She raced in, braced herself didnt murmur at all and said "ive been so brave mummy. I didnt even screw my face up like you do!"

She left me stunned. Got in the car to her present and tells everyone that she had a sharp scratch. A few days later she whispered mummy that needle hurted me and i dont want it again. That was as dramatic as it got.

You can buy Emla cream from the pharmacy now I think. It's the local anaesthetic cream used in hospitals for blood tests etc on children. Haven't bought it myself so don't know how expensive it is (friend gave me left overs of her tube). You put it on an hour before the jabs and it numbs the skin. Doesn't make it totally pain free but usually improves things a lot.

And of course chocolate bribery.

I thought mine would scream. She just said Owww very loudly then complained "she pinched me mummy". She was very indignant and told everyone who would listen that the nurse pinched her.

tell him it's like a hard twisty pinch, ask him if he knows what that feels like(chances are another child might of done this to him already), and that when a pinch happens, it hurts then it is over,

then offer to let him pinch your arm (or daddy's), let him do it, then say ouch that hurts, lets rub it better then ask if he wants you to do one on him, if he does do a little one, then talk about how to make it feel better,

then talk about how we never hurt a person on purpose, but sometimes we have to do a little hurt (injection) so we avoid much bigger illness that wouldn't get better with a rub,

a friend who has a lot of children, introduced me to this method, I was very sceptical but children seem to be interested in discussing it like this, and it worked really well, part of distress is the surprise that something painful is happing suddenly without prior discussion. Mine all having had the chat, went on to take it really well, no real fuss.

If he knows it going to be like a twisty pinch then he can prepare himself, and he knows it will feel better quite quickly, and he can go and choose his treat for being brave.

Agree with be honest, yes it will hurt but Mummy will be there for a cuddle afterwards - you can have a sticker, chocolate etc. I don't know if you have any younger children, but I also found a friend with me to stay in the waiting room with dc2 meant I could go in alone with dc1 and concentrate on him.

Also, he may be fine at the time but expect some unsettledness (sp?) over the following days. In ds1's case this meant some toilet accidents although he was toilet trained by then and normally fine. Nursery commented on it and said it was probably due to the jabs so they were used to it. Next time, I plan to have a few days at home afterwards if possible.

You need to tell him before you go. If you don't he will worry that it's going to happen again every time you go to the surgery.

It is a shame that they have to do it twice. Our surgery tries to have two nurses available so they can do both at the same time then there's no fighting to get the second one in.

Tell him it is like a scratch and then bet him one packet of sweets for each arm or leg or (other reward) that it will stop hurting before he can count to ten. He will make sure you lose the bet and he'll feel better.

I hope it goes well.

Definitely agree with them knowing its ok to vocalise pain as well. When DS has needles we say ow together.

Thanks for all the tips :)

I've had a chat with him over lunch. I told him we've got to go to the doctors because now he's such a big boy and goes to school (nursery) he needs some special medicine to stop him from getting poorly, the only way to give this medicine is to put it in his arm with a needle. It might hurt a little bit but it's just like a scratch and it'll be over very quickly. I showed him how he'll sit on my knee and how I'll hug him during. I told him he can have Calpol afterwards if he needs to (he loves 'pink medicine') and that he can stay up a little bit later than normal tomorrow night for cuddles with daddy when DH gets home.

I've also promised a trip to the ice cream shop afterwards :o

He seems completely unfazed. I got a whiny-toned "but why!?" and then he seemed to accept it and is happily playing again.

Tell him.
Our nurse won't do a child who hasn't been told they're having an injection before they go into her room. She's very experienced, and has found that children who don't know find it much harder, plus they tend to have hysterics next time they are in the waiting room because they don't trust their parents to have told them what's happening.

I tell them, tell them it hurt, little prick in the arm. And tell them how it helps. Using a jigsaw helps. One bit of the jigsaw is the illness, one bit is the injection. The injection puts the jigsaw pieces into the arm. Then if the illness gets in, the jigsaw pieces fit together and can't hurt him. Mine liked this explanation.

I tend to tell the nurse to do it quickly, and not stop between jabs. Some parents like to stop the child crying after the first, and the nurse is happy to wait for that, if that's what the parent wants, but it seems illogical to calm them down and then do it again. At least the other way you can comfort them by saying it's all over.

We had this dilemma. Told him he was going to the docs, said he needed it to go to his favourite place as there's dinosaurs there. Then promised fav lunch followed by toy shopping.
1st jab was ok, 2nd was not so much.

Hope all goes well tomorrow - trip to the ice cream shop should do it .

At present the thinking seems to be that Calpol reduces the immune response (in the past many paediatricians advised parents to give Calpol about 30 - 60 mins before the jab), so I would not give that unless really necessary (high fever etc., which is unlikely).