Insomnia in children- any advice?

[cluttered]

DS1 is 13 next week and since Christmas has been having problems with insomnia. He was always a brilliant sleeper as a young child and slept very deeply, literally we have done carpentry in his room with the lights on at night and he wouldn't wake.

On Christmas Eve he was over-excited and stayed up late then when he tried to go to sleep he couldn't for about 3 hours. Since then he hasn't forgotten the worry of not being able to sleep when he wanted to and we have had periods of insomnia for a few weeks followed by a couple of months or so when he has no problems. He always does get to sleep by about 1 or 2 am but he gets more and more upset as the hours tick by knowing he has to get up for school in a few hours.

My question is, have any of you had DC who have experienced this and what did you do to help? I have had insomnia myself over the years (but didn't experience it at all until late teens) so I know how horrible it is. DS does all the right things, he has a good sleep regime and goes to sleep at the same time every night, even in the weekends he only stays up half an hour later than on school nights and he never sleeps in. He has no screen time after 9 pm and not in his bedroom, he has a hot milky drink and reads just before bedtime to make himself sleepy. He is not worried about anything at school, school is only a factor in that it makes him anxious knowing he will have to be getting up to get ready in x hours time.

If he comes out after an hour or so saying he can't sleep I often give him a Nytol (1 tablet of the 2 per night sort which I know says not for under 16, but 1 tablet which is half the adult dose has less of the active antihistamine ingredient, diphenhydramine, than the recommended dose of Benilyn cough mixture which is OK for 12+). If he hasn't had Nytol and is getting really distraught I occasionally give him Phenergan which can be used as a sedative in children. However I am concerned he is relying on these medicines too much. I don't know whether it is worth taking him to the GP, they obviously wouldn't prescribe sleeping tablets to a child and nor would I want them to but I am not sure what else they could suggest?

Do I just need to wait for him to develop his own coping mechanisms? When he realises it isn't the end of the world being a bit sleep-deprived maybe things will improve? Does anyone else have DC who have come through this? Sorry for the long post and thanks for reading.

Hi, I just wanted to respond as I had insomnia myself through my teens, so really sympathise with your son. I had some anxieties around school but I think you are right in that the anxiety about not sleeping takes on a life of its own. While it's lovely that you are so sympathetic, I wonder whether responding to him in this way, particularly with drugs, may be contributing to him seeing it as a big issue. If, as you said in your last paragraph, you hope he will begin to cope, you might want to try and downplay it a little bit.
In my own case I started sleeping well when I left home, no idea why as no problems with home life, the only thing I can think is that we lived in the middle of nowhere, and when I moved out and lived in a city I found the street lights and noises of people very comforting.
Sorry I can't give any more helpful suggestions, but I really do think downplaying it, and stopping the use of drugs (he is old enough for you to explain that they are not something to be relied upon) will help. You would of course need to remain vigilant that things are not getting worse/affecting school work etc, but not show him you are worried.

The last time I had insomnia was while I was pregnant, having dealt with it when I was younger I took the pragmatic view that it wasn't the end of the world if I had a bit less sleep than usual, and told myself that lying in bed with a book and resting would be helpful even if I couldn't sleep. It passed, thankfully. Oh and I played a game in my head where I went through the alphabet thinking of words relating to a particular subject, for examples naming animals beginning with a,b,c,d etc. It helped me drift off!
Maybe you could encourage him to get settled in bed, with a book or something other quiet activity, and suggest that he tried to at least stay in bed even if he can't sleep so his body gets some rest.

On nowhere near the same scale, my 5 year-old has trouble getting to sleep despite being exhausted. The birth of his sister seemed to trigger this. Sorry, I don't have any suggestions other than above but love the alphabet idea. I'm going to tell him to try this.
I think I've made it worse by making a big deal of how tired he is, plus he sees how it stresses me out. my only solution so far has been to stop showing him how it's affecting me. Difficult though.
I'll be watching this thread for any other ideas.

My dd is similar but not So bad. She's nearly 8 and is often awake til 9.30 or 10pm and then hell to get up in the morning. She's very very active and swims every day so is physically tired by 6pm, then seems to wake up. We've tried lavender, drinking milk / eating bananas before bedtime, warm baths, reading / no reading, no tv, we recently bought a lumie sunset /sunrise clock, which is helping.

I read somewhere that unless you wake up in the night, it's not insomnia but delayed sleep. I think it's something to do with melatonin levels and although we live outside the uk and can get melatonin here, dd1 is too little to take it. We go back to the uk once a year and despite the 7 hour time difference and jetlag, dd1 still has the same issue.

cluttered I would take your ds to the gp to see what he says, especially as you are medicating. Have you tried giving him a new vitamin ("stronger sleeping tablet") as a placebo to see if that works? Is your ds tired in the mornings / evenings? Might be an idea to keep a food / activity / sleep diary for a couple of weeks in the run up to your gp appointment in case there is something you don't know about that could be triggering this, although it looks like you are both doing all the sensible things.... Hope this gets resolved soon

Thanks for all your responses. I have also tried alphabet games in the past hardlyever, I will suggest it to DS because it actually did really help. When he has a problem he does stay in bed but he doesn't want the light on to read because he thinks that will prevent him falling asleep so something he can do in his head would be very helpful. Otherwise he just comes out every hour or so getting more and more distraught at his inability to sleep and I end up staying up also because it is horrid being the only one in the house awake.

I will take DS to the GP but first I will keep a more careful record of the frequency of the problem and any relevant events over the next month or so. One thing I have noticed is that he is more likely to have problems if we have had a particularly early evening meal so he may be hungry again at bedtime without realising it.

I am just crossing my fingers that things will improve before he starts coming under more pressure work-wise at secondary school, although he did have several exams in Year 7 and I don't think he had any particular problems sleeping over that period. I will let you know what happens anyway.

Just wanted to reply to butterflies to say my Ds has literally two days ago been prescribed melatonin and oh my god, the difference it has made. He is now dropping off in a normal amount of time, ie not long at all, rather than the anything from 30 minutes to 2 hours previously. He is five so I don't know where you have got the information that eight is too young from. He does have cerebral palsy though and it is known to be more likely that kids with cp can have lowered melatonin levels, so maybe that's why the consultant finally prescribed it after two years of difficulties with him.

Cluttered, I do think a trip to the GP may be a good idea, as long as they are the right sort, as it may reassure your son to be told by a medic that it's not unusual etc (and they obviously may have some solutions! Melatonin may be helpful short term for him possibly as it's a natural hormone rather than a drug iyswim). Good luck for him - horrible not being able to drop off.

Went to doctors today for 11 year old that won't drop off to sleep.
Got Piritin.
Will give it a try. But need find what is on his mind as he a worrier.

floozietoozie - melatonin ypu say. It that a uk doctor prescribed that? I shall ask for that when back at doctors on Friday with kid.

Good luck getting melatonin from a GP. Sorry to be negative but my DS has Aspergers and all of the associated sleep problems and was prescribed melatonin by hospital paediatrician. When he moved on to college he was discharged by the hospital into the care of the GP. Even with hospital recommendation for melatonin to continue, I had to battle for 6 months with local PALS help before GP agreed to continue prescribing. The problrm is melatonin is hugely expensive. I wish you luck

Ds has issues getting to sleep. Guided meditation helps him, there's lot's suitable for Kidd on you tube and spotify. There a great way of clearing the mind and settling in for sleep.

You can buy it online......

Research is still ongoing about times to take it, the dosage, and the affect, so maybe not worth the risk