Out of mind with worry, dd (nearly 4) has decided she doesn't like food and had eaten nothing for over 4 days

[beatofthedrum]

My dd has always been a picky eater but eaten the food she 'likes' in decent quantities and have always been careful to ensure a balanced diet. Last wed she started behaving strangely with her food, holding it in her mouth a long time and wanting drinks to persuade her to swallow it. By Thursday she was saying she disliked all her favourite foods and mealtimes were stressful. On Friday she stopped eating. Totally stopped and no amount of persuading/telling her Santa was watching/trying to act casual and let her choose worked. She didn't eat Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday (I'm crying typing this, it is scaring me so much). She keeps spitting into her hands and sitting there with it and she is such a fastidious little girl usually, can't best paint on her hands etc. She is letting saliva hang out of her mouth, really regressive behaviour. Christmas has been totally spoilt by the worry of this. Everyone is telling me to act casual and I have tried, believe me, but how long can you leave a situation when a little girl is voluntarily eating absolutely nothing. I manage to be casual for a few hours then I lose it, either begging her to eat or (not proud of it) shouting at her. I've phoned NHS Direct twice and they've been great but all they could do was direct us to an out of hours gp who ruled out temperature, sores in her mouth/throat. He gave us oral thrush medicine just incase was that though he could see nothing but she won't let ANYTHING in her mouth, both hands over mouth screaming crazily. I am so scared. Last night she started eating while watching tv. She ate one babybel then asked for 2 more. Refused everything else I quietly slipped beside her. Went to bed feeling much brighter but she was up in night with very sore tummy and 2 big vomiting bouts - she lost all that she'd eaten. What can I do?? Surgeries not open till tomo. Does nit really seem a GP issue as she seems to be developing some kind of phobia about food. Could really do with some advice. Thanks.

What time was the last thing she ate Friday and what time did she eat the cheese Monday? What has she eaten today?

The only change that's happened recently is that she's just got glasses. She's taken to them really well, no fuss.
Was her first Christmas with her baby brother but he's over 11 months old and she loves him.
Happy at nursery, happy at home. Just don't know where to go with this. Is a total nightmare.

Calm down

Ok - she's having the smoothies and drinks so she will be ok. Food is often a battleground and it cuts us to the quick for a couple of reasons. Firstly we associate food and love far more closely than we realise. Our child rejects our food, she's rejecting us (as we see it). Our child won't eat - other people will think we don't love her enough to provide the right stuff.
The other reason is anorexia - as a mother I know eating disorders are a threat to my child - like all sorts of other horrible things - so anything that hints at that freaks us out.

What you need to do is make sure food is available so she can access it without it being a big deal but DON'T coax her o generally go on about it. When you do that you make food a topic of conversation, you make it part of your relationship and it isn't - it's just fuel.

This is really easy to say bt - I know I would be freaked out too and I hope somebody would come along and tell me to breathe and back off in that case

Well, conservatively - for the time being. Keep giving her what she will eat/drink - smoothies, milk, anything that goes down and has calories in it. My 4yo who is now 8 barely ate real food anyway. He just liked bottles of milk (he regressed at that point as I'd had another baby!!!). Kids can survive well on a liquid diet for a while.

So no panic. She's not obviously unwell, apart from the vomiting, so watch and wait might be Ok for now. If she is sick again, has more tummy pain, or anything else changes then of course take her back to the GP - meanwhile, keep asking her whether her mouth hurts, if her food tastes odd, that sort of thing - the more clues the better.

eg. If you'd said initially about her comment that the food is 'itchy', I'd have not gone off on one about blockages and so on - so keep asking her for clues.

I don't mean go on about it all the time - but if she says, I can't eat such and such, ask why not - etc.

I agree with NL not to make a huge issue of it, but that's hard when it's your child.

GP said to me when I had food concerns about my DS that she does not get concerned until at least 5 days have passed with no food. AS LONG AS LIQUIDS ARE BEING CONSUMED.

Sounds like a bug, and my guess is that she will pick up tomorrow.

Be strong
xx

darn! Not foot and hand and mouth then!

I do think Northern Lurker's post is excellent advice. I find this when my DS is recovering from a stomach upset. It always takes for ever a while for his apetite to return and there's nothing to him anyway so its always stressful. Having different easy foods around the place is a really good tip.

As my SIL always says, they'll eat when they are ready to.....

I think it does sound like a bug. Doctors aren't always right. I know you said she's good at telling you what's wrong etc but we don't always have the vocab or know what's wrong really do we.

We spent Christmas with friends but came back early yesterday as I had been running to the toilet all morning. Everyone else was fine. My friend called this morning, they have both been up all night with D&V - all the kids are fine (touch wood, so far) their symptoms are different to mine. We are all now 'empty' and at times feel hungry, but at other times still feel sick. None of us have eaten. I have a horrible taste in my mouth and if I was only four I'd probably spit it out/drool too.

Just give it a couple more days of offering her drinks and tell her that you will get her something to eat when she says she wants it.

I know it's hard when it's your baby, but honestly, it's far more likely that it's her body's way of coping with one of the bugs that's going around than to be something behavioural - and even if it is behavioural then being calm and letting her get on with it is the way forward, so it's a win/win on the calm & ignoring it stakes isn't it x

Thanks you lot, these last few posts are ringing oh so true. So hard when it's your baby, sniff. Need to get a hold of myself and present a consistently calm front. Just can't understand what is going on and I feel a need to understand her. She is just behaving so oddly, all this spitting/ saliva is not normal for her. My instinct is that something is wrong and I can't shake the feeling of unease.

If she is able to drink then she should be physically able to swallow saliva.

Heck she's not swallowing her saliva. She's not "picky" she's I'll.

Get her to casualty. Ignore nhs direct and out of hours GP. Drooling is a serious symptom

When our ds was 2 and we were in turkey onboliday, he got a virus and ran a very hight temperature. We gave him calpol and ibuprofen as recommneded. He then stopped eating for more than a week. Fortunatly he was still bf, so it was less of a worry as we knew he was gettimg plenty fluids and calories. It turned out that he was allergic to ibuprofne and it had given him terrible mouth ulcers.

"My instinct is that something is wrong" then I would go with that.

You are her mother and if your instincts say there's something wrong then don't let the Doctor put you off trying to working out what's wrong.

General Practitioners are just that - they're not specialists and can give duff advice sometimes. (For example, a friend of mine was told earlier this year by a GP that her 18mo old was sick because she was still BFing Turns out months later that advice was complete twaddle and he most likely has Celiac's disease. He has been in pain in the meantime, because of the delay in diagnosing / treating it correctly. Incidentally mumsnet diagnosed him in an hour!)

In your position I would continue trying to work out what the possible causes could be (mumset is a great place to start) - and go back in a few days if no improvement and ask to see a different doctor if possible.

Sorry that was too polite. I'd insist on seeing a different doctor!

Well at least the GP has been able to rule out anything more serious for now. But they're not all-knowing so I'd guess it's still a bug personally. 2.10mo DS is just getting over a cold that turned into a chest infection, and he has been drooling a fair bit with that.

Fingers crossed for you that she's feeling better soon and back to her normal eating habits.

I also think you should get another opinion. There are all kinds of things that can cause mouth and throat pain that you would need to swab and test for, not just look at.

My toddler DS recently went a while without eating, it turns out it was tonsillitis but they couldn't tell until the 3rd doctor's visit because it simply wasn't that visible before then. He was fine after some antibiotics.

Was that your own GP you saw or an emergency out of hours one?

I would be inclined to take her to your won GP tomorrow or seek another opinion from another GP in the surgery.

About 18 months ago, my then 5yo wouldn't eat anything for about a week. By the end of the week I was starting to get angry (thought he was just messing about) when he suddenly rushed from the table and vomited copiously.

A week later his then 18mo brother did the same thing - was off his food etc. After a few days I took him to the doctor who couldn't find anything wrong, though he was retching and spitting on the floor. A few days after that, he started vomiting too - it was much worse in his case, he vomited for about 24 hours and ended up severly dehydrated in hospital.

Turned out it was the adenovirus, which is very nasty - and typically starts with a week/ten days build up of queasiness beforehand.

Thanks you lot, these last few posts are ringing oh so true. So hard when it's your baby, sniff. Need to get a hold of myself and present a consistently calm front. Just can't understand what is going on and I feel a need to understand her. She is just behaving so oddly, all this spitting/ saliva is not normal for her. My instinct is that something is wrong and I can't shake the feeling of unease.

So PLEASE seek help again. Don't ignore your instincts and the fact that this drooling and spitting is very odd.

Sorry, that has reposted somehow. You are all correct. We can't go on like this. Am going to my own very nice gp tomorrow morning (will easily cry on the phone to get an appt the way I'm feeling!) and leave until I've been referred on.

I think I would try and get another opinion too. I'm afraid to say that in case people jump on me again. But i wouldn't just wait, not if it were my own child.

Has she eaten anything yet today? Has it stayed down?

Drooling can be a symptom of something that's been swallowed and got stuck somewhere. I don't know why that would make her spit out her food. but I think I would probably be trying to get an x ray based solely on the drooling and vomiting.

See here.

It's really unlikely but I think if I felt as uneasy as you clearly do, I'd try and explore all the angles, just basically to put my mind at rest. iyswim?

Oh crossed posts, best of luck tomorrow - try to get referred for investigation, just to be on the safe side as it's been going on for nearly a week.

It really cannot do any harm to have an x ray at least. And it might make you feel a bit less anxious, which in turn will help your dd feel less anxious.

interesting!