6 yo DD bilateral hernias - to operate or not?!

[Sugarbeach]

About a month ago DD was diagnosed as having bilateral hernias due to straining to go while suffering from acute constipation in August....I'm still trying hard not to beat myself up over this. Her constipation seems to be under control for now - the advice was not to operate until the constipation/straining is resolved - which makes sense. As with the hernias - the advice from two doctors (both surgeons) was that the hernias will not go away, it will only get worse over time, so the recommendation is to repair by surgery now, although the final decision, of course is ours as parents.

When I saw the doc this week to review her hernias/constipation, I was so hoping that he was going to say that the hernias will resolve themselves over time without surgery.

I have read/heard that hernias can heal by themselves without surgery, my naturopathic doc also said this is possible although not guaranteed, but then 2 other docs have said that hernias don't go away......but then they are surgeons, of course they'd say that......and then if you read the internet you also see read that you can cure cancer or gallstones by eating coconuts or mangoes or raw food etc..

I really don't want to subject DD to surgery if I can help it.
Please help me think through this one.
Specifically, has anyone had to make the same decision, or had decided against having surgery and in hindsight, was happy that it was the right decision?

Thanks for reading my ramble and for any info, advice or experiences shared.

DS1 had a double inguinal hernia operation at 3 months old, we had no choice really as they were both big and at risk of becomming strangulated; which is extremely serious if it happens and needs immediate surgery. He breezed throught the operation, which took about 45 mins.

You can't see any scars now (he's 9) tiny slits using key hole surgery. I think it was much more stressfull for the parents, the thought of your child having an operation is not fun. But the staff were excellent with DS and us, we went in at 7am and we were out buy 4pm; he just had to pee before we could be released. The stitches dissolved and he had a cling film like plastic covering over the whole area so he could have a bath. And the next day he acted just the same.

I would trust the surgeon, they don't operate is they don't have to. It's mechanical issue in terms of repair, not something tablets and diets can fix if you see what I mean.

What if the constipation comes back and she gets a strangulated hernia? That would be far more complicated and scary than a routine, planned op. You need to be calm, confident and reassuring for your child if you go ahead. You sound as if you are more worried about the op than the actual procedure to rectify the issue. Did you talk to the surgeon in more detail about the op, recovery times etc. I am sure that would reassure you.

It is hard to make these decisions when it's your child, I had no choice really because doing nothing was not an option, but I am glad we did and 9 years on we've had no issues.

Don't beat yourself up, some kids get constipation, it't not your fault.