Taking dd (6) to doctor about her bedwetting next week- anyone know what to expect?

[Joolyjoolyjoo]

Hi All,

I'm finally taking dd2 (6) to the doctor next week about her bedwetting. She has never had a dry night, and I have been fine with that, saying her body would do it when she is ready. We have tried going without her "special pants" but she always ends up asleep in a big cold puddle of wee

we've tried lifting her later on, and she went to the toilet fine, but she was still wet in the morning. She seems to produce a lot of urine at night, and she doesn't wake, even when she is wet through. I wondered about those alarm-thingy's, but I've heard they can be distressing to some children.

I was hoping she would just grow out of it- I know they start producing anti-diuretic hormone in larger amounts at night, and sometimes that doesn't happen until they are 7 or so, so I was ok to wait, but she is getting really down about it, and really really wants to not wear the special pants. A complicating factor is that I haven't dared starting to get her 3.11 yo brother dry at night yet, as I know it would demoralise her so much.

I didn't want to make it an issue for her, but it would seem it IS an issue for her, and she wants me to help her. So I've arranged a doctor's appointment with the nice smiley child-friendly female doctor in the practice, and was just wondering what I should expect from this appointment- would we be referred to a special clinic? Will we be told to leave it and come back when she is 7? Should I bring a urine sample (from dd, obviously!)

Any experiences you have (or any docs out there) would be greatly appreciated. She is really excited about this appointment, and I am trying not to get her hopes up too much- I realise it won't be a magic cure! I feel guilty that she is so eager. Maybe I should have done this ages ago, but I didn't want to make a big deal out it, and everyone told me it would just happen when she was ready. I feel like I have let her down a little.

TIA for any info you can share

Ahh great news, so pleased for you both

Keep me updated! All the best.

Thanks guys Dd is happy to have a way forward, although I've made sure she knows the tablets are not a "magic" cure. I'm waiting until the weekend, when things are a bit more relaxed, then I'm going to try her with the bed layering and the tablets. I'm going to take a deep breath and start ds without the pyama pants too. I am clearing the wash baskets in anticipation!

FAB, I would have been happy to wait, but poor dd2 really wasn't I know one of the nurses at the GP practice really well, and I had asked her which doctor would be best to talk to. She confirmed it was probably the one I had thought, based on the way she has been with the children previously! The GP was really nice- she spoke to dd, and took her worries seriously (some GPs seem to have problems even doing that with adults!) I did say we were aware it might just be a matter of time, but she said that when children get to school-age, and are not happy with the situation like dd, it can affect their self-esteem. There was never any hint of "wait a while" which I was expecting, tbh. So glad we have a lovely understanding GP (I know she has 2 young children herself, so probably has some empathy!) I feel quite positive about it all now and, more importantly, so does dd Sure we will have many setbacks along the way, but I feel glad I have helped her. DD was really excited and happy to be going to the doctor today, and I was really proud of her

Do you have half term next week too - that will be good if you do.

I really really hope the tablets & 'no nappies' works for her. Fingers well crossed!!

Chipping- unfortunately we had half-term this week, and the poor dc aren't getting much of a "holiday" at all, as dad has gone off on holiday (he picks his moments)and DH is busy at work, so they are having to come to work with me (the benefits of being your own boss and having a child-friendly basement!), and mornings are still a bit "stressy" Hopefully next week DH has a day or two off and dad will be back, so there will be a bit more support, and a bit more routine (at the moment DH is home late and I work until 6, so they are eating later, bath later etc) Add to that that dd1 is off on a sleepover tonight, which means dd2 has opted to sleep in beside ds and things are all over the place!

Manyana, manyana, huh?

There's a current train of thought that if a child isn't dry by 5 then it is unlikely to resolve without some intervention (even if as simple as bladder training) and so referrals/assessment should take place much earlier than 7. Some children do just 'grow out of it' but in most cases some sort of intervention is needed.

I can't see anything changing quickly though, Enuresis clinics tend to be in great demand and dropping the age to 5 may well impact hugely on waiting lists. Ours used to have a waiting time of 6 months on average which is about 5 months too long IMO

Oh - that's a shame/annoying/typical/frustrating!!

I bet DD is really excited about trying this - only one more sleep!

Also, are you making sure she has started drinking a lot more in the day, in preparation? It sounds like this will help and it might make her feel that she's started doing something towards it :)

Sidge - yet another thing that needs more funding :(

Thanks everyone, I feel so much better about my DD's bedwetting now and am raring to have a chat with her! My DD's 5 and regularly does 2 wee's a night and has wet pants often during the day. I try desperately not to get cross at her cos I know it's not her fault, but it's oh so hard, especially when I'm tired and have to do yet more washing each day.

I love the idea of layering the bed, will def do that! And I like the idea of bladder training, it's something posative to do rather than just being patient and waiting for things to happen.

One thing though, Sidge, you mention that milk is a bad thing cos the body thinks of it as a food. I've never heard of that before, my DD drinks loads of milk, should I get her to drink water at evening meal then?

I feel so much better knowing I'm not the only one who has problems though!

This threads totally confusing me. My ds has JUST turned 5, we've never tried him without his pull ups, they're soaking every morning and he's starting to be aware of it.

I spoke to the HV last year just before he turned 5, she told me it was normal until about 5 but if he wasn't dry by now shed have to refer him. Of course I'm now stressed about it and my mum is having a go saying I shouldve lifted him at 11pm. My dh was a bedwetter until 8....

Another one here with a night time bedwetter. DS is newly 8. He has never been try at night thought he trained easily and quickly during the day with few accidents ever since. Please all of you visiting eneurisis clinics will you let us know what they say ? We are not in the UK so cant visit one.

Two tips that have saved my life:

• If you are doing the layering thing then hippychick produces these fantastic bedpads which feel like a soft flannel blanket but are actually totally waterprood. They are pricey (I cant remember how much I paid now on AMazon, but I know it was a lot) but so worth it. I layer the bed with sheet, hippychick pad, another sheet, then another hippychick pad, then another sheet and finally a waterproof mattress cover. So there are plenty of layers to strip in the night, and then it all gets flung into the washing machine in the am.

• I also feel uncomfortable with the idea of a reward for becoming dry as for me too it suggestes that being dry is'good' and wet in the night is wilfully 'naughty'. BUT...and it's a big but, I worked out, with DS, the cost of the nappies we were using each night (we were using two pull-ups, one over the other). And I agreed that while he is out of nappies/using the alarm (which we are trying at the moment) he could have the nappy money. He is thrilled, as the money adds up horribly quickly. And I have discussed with him how much nicer and more fun it is to spend that money on toys and things he wants rather than nappies to be thrown away. And I have promised DS that when he is dry for 14 straight nights he can have the cost of the next pack of nappies - again, quite a sum for a little boy. So perhaps I am being a bit disingeneous when I say I dont do rewards but the financial incentive has really helped DS to stick with the alarm.

I am praying the alarm works for us. I'll let you know.

Breeg1 milk isn't 'bad' but in terms of night wetting it's best avoided after teatime really. You could try giving her just water with dinner and afterwards and see if it makes a difference to the timing of her wetting.

If she has wet pants during the day she may well benefit from bladder training - her bladder may well be a little weak and flabby allowing a bit of wee to escape. Young children also put off going to the loo as long as possible as they're far too busy doing more interesting stuff so do make sure she's reminded to go and do a wee every couple of hours or so.

leftmymistletoe ignore your mum, lifting won't help in the long term - it can achieve a dry bed but doesn't actually help the child learn to be dry as it perpetuates the "wee whilst you're asleep" message to the brain. And some children never have a dry pull up as they semi-wake, think "oh I've got my pull-up on, I can just wee in that" and go back to sleep.

If you're feeling up to it you could start the bladder training (see my long post to JoolyJoo further up) and then try going without the pull-up and see what happens, but if his dad was a late wetter he might follow in his footsteps and just take a bit longer to become dry.

Is it better not to wake them up then? I've been waking my DD for a wee around 9-10pm and my hubby's been doing it too (when he remembers) around 12-1am. Even with this, DD's still wet in the morning. I've been wondering if her problem is that she's completely shattered with being woken up repeatedly??

With all the weeing during the night, I've been wondering whether to put her back into pull ups at nighttime. I know she's not keen on the idea though and was wondering if it would undermine her confidence, or if it would give her a chance to relax a bit and have a good nights sleep? Does anyone have any ideas??